As Transamorous Network clients get how important their stories are, they also learn something crucial for living amazing lives: how to identify intrusive thoughts.
Intrusive thoughts are ideas popping up seeming unbidden. They are intuitions which, if followed, lead to everything someone wants.
But if a person doesn’t know how to tune themselves to intrusive thoughts, or they don’t understand where intrusive thoughts come from, life can get pretty crazy, including dating life. That crazy is where “drama” in relationships comes from.
Here’s how to put a stop to that and meet the guy or transgender woman you want.
Intrusive thoughts come from somewhere
Where intrusive thoughts come from is important, because if you don’t know where they’re coming from and you follow them, they could create experiences you don’t want, including drama.
Everyone creates their reality. Most people get a little of what they want and a lot of what they don’t. That’s because they don’t understand what you’re reading.
For example, a trans-attracted man who feels shame about his trans attraction will encounter realities in which the only transgender women he meets match his shame.
They (the transgender women) will be users, or they’ll consider him shady or a “chaser”. They themselves will be insecure and shame-filled (i.e. feeling unworthy) thereby perfectly matching the man’s feelings about himself.
In this humorous clip, a transgender woman gets an earful in her session as we talk (for the first time) about intrusive thoughts. It’s worth listening to because she gets several insights at once, all in less than five minutes.
Everyone is a match
This is why I’m not so interested in meeting transgender women right now. Because while I’m far beyond soothing negative stories that create shame, I want far more in my relationship than an average experience.
I want an extraordinary experience. Having that means I must be a match to it. I must, in other words, become extraordinary myself.
Everyone showing up in our lives matches stories we’re telling ourselves. Those stories determine what impulses, what intrusive thoughts come into our awareness. Our emotions help us know whether to follow an intrusive thought or not. So knowing how one feels is really important.
I know two things tell me how my life is going: what shows up in life now and how I feel.
Paying attention to that helps me understand what intrusive thoughts are coming and whether or not I want to follow them. Following those consistent with my positive stories is creating an increasingly amazing life.
It can work that way for you too.
