I so love when the universe helps clients realize they can trust it, instead of “doing”. That’s what happened this week with a client seeking love.
If you’ve read some posts here before, you know I encourage readers avoid online dating. It’s costly. It rarely succeeds. And it’s not very fun. Especially for trans or trans-attracted people.
Recently, a client came to her own understanding of this. She realized, unconsciously, as most clients do, that the Universe is a wish-granting jewel. It constantly fulfills every desire.
Just because it does that, though, doesn’t mean we receive every desire fulfilled. To receive, we must be tuned in. We must be on the same frequency of the fulfilled desire. That means, of course, following Broader Perspective impulses. If we do that, we end up at the perfect place and time to real-ize fulfilled desire.
However, most of us don’t know how to hear impulses. So we move through life haphazardly. Doing that, we learn to rely on “doing”. Especially when looking for that perfect trans woman. Or that guy who will accept us for who we are. We try making things happen, instead of allowing them to happen for us.
That’s what lead to my client’s epiphany.
Attachment breeds unconsciousness
My client currently is in love. Rather, she thinks she is. Actually, she’s in very strong attachment. Strong attachment over this guy she thinks is “The One”. The problem is, no person is that. The only “The One” in our lives is us. In other words, we each are our own “The One”.
Most of us don’t realize this though. That’s because human society talks us out of our inner knowing. We then forget we are eternal. We forget we are eternally loved and that no love can compare to that. Especially conditional love of another human.
This client finds herself thus. She’s struggling, therefore. She’s struggling because she’s experiencing things about this guy she doesn’t like. Every time they spend time together and get close, for example, he freaks out. Intimacy frightens him. So he’ll waffle. One day he’s all Lovey-dovey. The next day, he “needs space.”
This pattern may sound familiar.
The problem for my client is her attachment. She wants so bad for this person to change. But he can’t change when she focuses so much on his behavior. Behavior reflecting her own waffling way of being.
That’s right, my client realizes in this contrast presented by this guy that she was this way in relationship for decades. So here she is having her dominant way of being in relationship reflected back to her.
I told her this was the purpose of this relationship. To have her see what stories she’s telling. To have her see them so that she can change her stories.
But she’s not having that. Which has her suffering in indecision and strong resistance. Resistance she thinks is desire. Resistance she thinks is love.
Which is why what happened next is so compelling.
The Universe delivers
While my client holds onto her attachment for dear life, her focus on what she doesn’t want already has created what she does want. The Universe already answered her desire for a better relationship, in other words.
And even though she witnessed this unfolding, which I’ll describe in a moment, her attachment still has her pining for this one guy, rather than going with the flow of her unfolding manifestation. Here’s what that looks like:
“I was on my Facebook profile,” she explained one session. We were talking about her dating possibilities and how the Universe keys up an infinite stream of better quality men for her.
“I rarely visit that profile,” She said. “But when I did lately, I noticed I had 150 new friend requests!”
Then she changed the subject: “I’m on eHarmony,” She said. “None of the men I see there are attractive to me. It’s depressing.”
The client said she wondered while viewing her online dating profile if she should date only widowers. She thinks such men would be better matches. That’s because, supposedly, they had long, enduring relationships right up to the bitter end! Then she said she also thought she should date only engineers, since she gets along with such guys easily. (She used to work in an engineering-heavy industry.)
“So when I looked at the friend requests,” She explained, coming back to the original subject. “Four of them were really handsome men. All four were widowers and all were engineers! And…each of them expressed interest in me! That’s so weird! “
“Weird” means “I’m oblivious”
“Weird” is a common refrain from clients. Like the majority of people, they don’t get how consistently Universe delivers on all desires. So they don’t experience enough evidence of this in their lives. When I point it out as happening, they can’t believe it’s just how the Universe works. They instead see these experiences as standing out. As strange. As “weird”.
In time, anyone will move beyond “weird” to just accepting their worthiness. But until then, people just can’t accept that these “coincidences” are how the Universe works. In other words, they’re oblivious. And that obliviousness blocks them from seeing their desires fulfilling themselves, like this client seeing the Universe give her matches without her having to do anything.
This obliviousness is why people are dating online. And trying to “make” other things happen in their lives. They think “doing” is the key to getting what they want. When in fact, relaxing and trusting will make it happen easier and with more fun.
People make a lot of money off other people thinking “doing” is the only way.
I encouraged my client to get this. That the Universe knows better how to deliver what she wants. And that no amount of doing can replace the power and leverage of the Universe.
She’s still attached. So she’s still struggling. But the wonder wasn’t wasted on me. I reveled in the awareness giving me insight into the gift the client received. Even if she didn’t enjoy that awareness fully…yet.
Because I know, in time, should she continue, she will gain that awareness. It’s the natural unfolding of All That Is. All That Is, which is what we all are.
Discover how the Universe is serving you with utmost loyalty. Contact me. Let’s get you started in your own practice.