transamorous men - The Transamorous Network

October 11, 2022August 29, 2022

When A Trans-Attracted Guy Teaches Me Something Great

Sometimes I’ll learn something great from clients. They come looking for relief from shame and embarrassment about being Trans-attracted. Or transgender women will come to me looking for freedom from a steady stream dating experiences that suck.

All clients, whether trans or trans-attracted seek something they know they’ll feel better if they get it. I’m focused on creating lives – for myself and others – that include everything wanted flowing effortlessly. I know this is possible. So clients who stick with me eventually get that, because that’s the story I’m committed to. They eventually relax into their trans-attraction, or their status as a transgender person. Then they get the wonderful life that is naturally theirs.

The process through which that happens often teaches me things too. That’s one reason I love this practice. It’s a non-ending series of expansionary moments adding up to the Charmed Life I write about.

Case in point: A recent experience with a trans-attracted client who quit his practice. Not only did his quitting teach me something, it proves the power inherent in telling stories.

Paying the price of struggle

Many people think “stories create your reality” or “manifesting” depends on focusing on what we want. Focus on what you want, goes the general lesson, and what you want will manifest. And while that is true, usually what’s happening is we focus on something other than what we want. Then we get that. And then we say “this manifesting business doesn’t work”. It’s why so many don’t believe “stories create your reality” works. It’s working. But the reality people get runs counter to what they want. And that’s because they’re not focusing on what they want.

What happened with this client demonstrates this with supreme perfection. I wrote about his departure in a Positively Focused blog post last week. In that post I shared how he chose a life of struggle and hard work as though those things were badges of honor.

However, a life of hard work and sacrifice isn’t worthy of a badge of honor. Well, it is to other humans. Other people will look at your struggle and hard work and tell you you’re doing an honorable thing. This includes the transgender community. Look around you. If you’re a transgender woman, I wager that your friends support your dating struggle. That’s because they struggle too. So your struggle and their struggle appear “normal”, the price you must pay to get what you want.

BUT YOU NEEDN’T PAY THAT PRICE. In paying that price, you help others feel better about their struggle. Meanwhile you don’t get what you want. Or, if you do, you feel crappy about the process of getting there and likely settle for something less than what you want or give up completely. Your example will, again, help others doing the same feel better about what they’re doing. Which produces the same results you produce.

Living a life of ease

But you’re not here to help others feel better about what they’re doing. You and I and everyone else came here for the fun of life. Not struggle. Transgender and trans-attracted people especially, came to live lives of unique, beautiful, expressive examples of human evolution!

We transgender and trans-attracted people exist to live our lives as the gods we are. We’re here to create unique lives consistent with that which thrills us. And, frankly, I don’t know anyone thrilled about living lives of struggle, sacrifice and pain born of working hard. Nor am I aware of anyone thrilled with a life wherein they don’t get what they want.

Lives lived as the gods we are lead to fun, joy and freedom. The path of struggle, hard work and sacrifice CAN lead there. But often, it doesn’t. (My artwork)

But nearly everyone lives lives almost exclusively filled with that. And the reason people feel anxiety about their lives, or depression, is, at the core of what they are, they know a better path is available.

So few take that path because they get caught up in stories lived by others which lead them astray. Meanwhile, a life of ease, joy and fun awaits those who choose the other way.

We’re all free to choose

It bears repeating. The honorable life is one lived consistent with what and who we are as gods in human form. That’s why the masses and society in general idolize those who “walk to the beat of their own drum”, who are authentic pioneers creating something brand new or earth shattering. Rarely do such people follow society’s general life prescription.

Living that way, as powerful creators we all are, means casting off bogus stories so we live lives wherein everything we want happens effortlessly. Our life can include all manner of great things, including awesome love with that perfect match, where all our needs are met. Humans are the only beings on this planet mostly not living this way. Meanwhile, everything else in nature enjoys the joy I’m describing. I described this in my previous post on Positively Focused.

So many humans choose struggle instead. Then venerate struggle as somehow honorable. I show people how to live lives of joy. Not struggle. So my clients’ lives become the Charmed Life I write about. Not every client ultimately chooses that though. And I must be ok with their choice.

Which brings me back to the client who recently left the pratice. This client chose to follow society’s stories of struggle and sacrifice. Their choosing taught me something awesome.

The power of powerful stories

I saw tremendous potential in this client. He quickly grasped the fundamentals. As a result, our conversations often included profound insights and realizations about how great life is. We also reveled over experiences he created up to that point. Experiences proving undoubtedly that the practice works. Some such manifestations he created he originally thought impossible.

For example, he once believed no transgender women lived in his community. As he changed his stories, though, he came to see them often. It’s not that the women weren’t there. They were. But his stories blinded him to their presence. Once he changed his stories, they started showing up everywhere.

Another, more powerful transformation involved something he did in the past. That act brought him so much shame and self-loathing, he considered ending his life on several occasions. A simple process of changing his stories about that act totally transformed his perspective about the act. Over time, he gave up suicidal thoughts. Then he saw how that act offered excellent future opportunity to transform other people’s lives.

So this client produced quite a number of experiences proving to him “stories create your reality” works. I saw even more powerful realizations ahead of him, were he to continue the practice.

My Powerful stories…

Yet, I also saw in him a potential for “darkness”. By darkness I mean a tendency, a strong potential, that others’ bogus stories about life would sweep him up and carry him away from his emerging Charmed Life.

I likened him to Anakin Skywalker, father of the famous Star Wars Jedi, Luke Skywalker. Anakin became the Star Wars villain Darth Vader after giving into the Dark Side of the Force. Anakin’s mentor, Obi Wan Kenobi saw great potential in Anakin. But what Obi Wan and his fellow Jedi Masters also saw was potential for the Dark Side. In the same way, I saw great potential in my client. And a chance he wouldn’t fulfill that potential.

A wax sculpture at the Madame Tussauds Star Wars exhibit in London depicting Hayden Christensen as Anakin Skywalker from the prequel trilogy. The client who recently ended his membership reminded me of the power of this Star Wars character possessed. And a similar potential for succumbing to the Dark Side. (Photo By big-ashb)

Self-fulfilling prophesy

I often shared this perspective with that client. I hoped doing so would encourage his leaning into the light of his Charmed Life. In doing so I forgot how effective I am as a creator. I forgot I create my reality — including how others show up — through what I focus on. Not what I want.

The more sessions we enjoyed, the more encouraged I got about his potential. But the more potential I saw, the stronger my thoughts about him “turning” got. Since I identify strongly with Jedi stories, I recognize a lot of momentum exists in me about those stories. What I didn’t realize was how powerfully they’d create the client I ended up with.

Later in our session evolution, I sensed a “disturbance” in his way of being. He started coming to sessions less prepared. He started offering pespectives reflecting doubt and suspicion. And he started questioning my path. He became a version of Anakin Skywalker. Right before my eyes! He even turned to the hard-work encouraging book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People!

One day he strongly disputed the validity of the personal reality unfolding in my life. Of course, he knew his stories about my unfolding reality was irrelevant. And he knew such doubts would create realities for him that would eventually have him leave the practice. But that didn’t stop his momentum. A momentum amplified by my own focus.

Neither he nor I was surprised when he said he wanted to end his practice. He punctuated his departure with belligerent statements, feeling offended and again disparaging my path. Remarkably, these are similar behaviors Anakin showed toward his mentor Obi Wan. At one point Anakin even tried killing his mentor before becoming Darth Vader.

You get what you focus on

After that interaction, I realized I got what I focused on. I got a promising client who chose turning away.

Of course I did not want this outcome. But looking back on stories I focused on the most about this client, I must admit they mainly were about him turning away from the practice. So his choice is no surprise in retrospect. After all, I am a powerful creator. I create EVERYTHING in my reality. That includes versions of those with whom I interact. And that includes clients with whom I work.

I’m no exception to universal laws. Just like anyone else, I create what I focus on, not what I want. Focus is key. So if I want what I want, I must focus on that. In this case, I focused on something other than what I wanted.

And I got that.

I feel like Obi Wan Kenobi. Losing his promising apprentice, Anakin, rocked Obi Wan to the core. Unlike Obi Wan, however, I know everything always works out. So I’m not going into self-imposed exile like he did. I’m not going to quit my practice or quit helping others. The client who left will be fine. And I learned something awesome. It’s an experience I’ll remember, always.

I love how this outcome came out of what many would consider a not-so-good experience. Seeing the positive side of it and amplifying that story must mean the future will bring even more and better opportunities. Ones in which I enjoy clients who stick around. Clients who fulfill their potential as proud and powerful trans-attracted and transgender people.

This experience made me a better creator; a better spiritual teacher as well. And for that, instead of feeling sad or sucky, I’m deeply appreciative.

October 4, 2022August 22, 2022

Some People Prefer Hard Lives Over The Easy Life

I wager if a transgender or trans-attracted person wanted to cross the United States, and the options were walking, driving or flying, that person would choose flying. And if instant teleportation were a thing, they’d choose that over flying. In other words, people choose the easy over the hard.

But when it comes to matters of having lives they love, most people, including transgender and trans-attracted ones, choose lives equivalent to walking across the country instead of flying. Then they proclaim how great they are for having made that choice.

I had a trans-attracted client cancel his membership recently. While I remain positive about it, I still recognize old stories I have about his choice. Those stories leave me feeling responsible for his decision. I’ll share why in next week’s post.

That said, his departure confirms what I know: most people remain nearly hopelessly inured to the stories that say success comes form hard work, struggle and sacrifice. So, they’d rather struggle, work hard as hell and “earn” their success whether that be in love or a career. If that success comes, then they’ll act like they did something honorable.

But finding honor in parroting what others do isn’t very honorable. Nor does doing so guarantee success. It’s, as Abraham says, “regurgitation”. The paradox is, so many regurgitate their lives as copies of what others are doing, especially when it comes to dating. Meanwhile, society holds up “original thinkers,” “pioneers” and “people who march to the beat of their own drums” as heroic life examples.

That paradox distinguishes the truly honorable from those indoctrinated into thinking parroting others’ paths merits accolades.

The leading edge isn’t for everyone

This client’s membership lasted over eight months. In that time he realized amazing epiphanies. Epiphanies that created way better life experiences than those he had before learning what he now knows.

So in our time together I helped him tremendously. He said he got all the tools he needs to deliberately create his reality along his desires. I agree.

But he declined to move into the advanced practice, as some others have. Not everyone wants a life proving nothing is impossible.

That’s ok. There’s never a crowd on the leading edge of anything. That includes expanding human consciousness. It also includes enjoying a life in which everything comes easy. Instead of crowds, pioneers populate that leading edge. They show humanity what is possible beyond stories defining things as impossible.

In reality, everything is possible. Including having the love one wants, however that looks. But one must believe that to experience it. And most will not question their stories long enough so that life shows they can have any life they desire. Including anything in that life that would bring them joy.

This client didn’t leave because of his disbelief though. As he put it, he prefers to work hard and earn his success. That sounds reasonable, doesn’t it? But his decision implies a kind of failure on my part.

Living indoctrinated

You see, the idea that one must work hard for one’s success is a persistent distortion of what’s happening on earth. Humans are the only species working hard, working themselves to the bone, their noses to grindstones, earning their living. Meanwhile ALL OF NATURE does exactly the opposite.

My failure is in not inspiring this person to give up his rigid indoctrination to stories that he must work hard for his success. In reality, his success, in everything he wants, including finding his transgender partner already is assured and exists for him. All he need do is line up with that reality and enjoy the fruits of his birthright without exerting any effort at all. But he believes there’s honor and some kind of glory in struggle and sacrifice. Cultural and societal indoctrination holds strong in him.

And so, he chooses to work hard, sacrifice and earn the success that’s already his. But because he can’t see he already has it, he’s willing to do anything to get it. Even if it means struggling.

It’s funny how literally millions of examples show how unnecessary working hard and struggling is. Those examples literally surround us. And every Great Master extolls in their teachings that life, by definition, is one of ease, joy and effortless abundance. That includes having the love one wants, whether one is transgender or trans-attracted.

Abundance is the rule

Animals and plants show how easy life can be. They don’t struggle. They don’t suffer. Everything they want comes to them. That’s why Jesus used examples from nature in his Sermon on the Mount.

In that sermon he extols the abundance, the natural state of being, which permeates all things. And he argues if nature enjoys such abundance, SO MUST HUMANS. So stop your struggle, he admonishes:

Look at the birds of the air, for they do not sow, nor do they reap, nor gather into barns. Yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much better than they? Why take thought about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: They neither work, nor do they spin.Yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not dressed like one of these.
Therefore, if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is here and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will He not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?…For your heavenly Father knows that you have need of all these things…seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be given to you. Therefore, take no thought about tomorrow, for tomorrow will take thought about the things of itself.
The Bible, Modern English Version

Struggle is overrated

What so many don’t know, despite distortive interpretations of such wisdom, is we are all God. In that state, we all bestow upon ourselves the plenty Jesus describes here. But our “little faith” keeps us chained to the toil we see others doing then create for ourselves. We memorialize others’ struggles as something honorable. Then we take that example as the way life is. And how our life should be.

That’s why so many choose life as my former client has. It’s the dark side of living. It’s choosing to live in insecurity and struggle. Such struggle needn’t be part of anyone’s life. But it’s easy falling into the trap of other people’s stories. Stories saying life is hard. Stories asserting that success comes through struggle. When we adopt such stories they become our own. Then we lose the grace, the love, joy and blessings Jesus refers to in his sermon.

The Sermon on the Mount Carl Bloch, 1890. Jesus was onto something important.

Culture, family, religious expectations, national expectations, workplace expectations and parental expectations all drive people to such bogus conclusions. Transgender and trans-attracted people should know this already. Because of our trans-status, many of us get guff from those whose stories tell them trans-status is “brainwashing” or some other negative fallacy.

We all create our realities. Such reality stems from our stories. The problem is, when we take on other people’s stories, theirs become ours. Then our reality matches others’ stories. It’s why life looks so similar for so many. It’s why so many trans-attracted men go on dating sites, or try finding their partner in bars and clubs.

That’s how bogus stories become truth. People see what others do. Not knowing they can create any reality they want, then they copy others’ stories. Then they do what others do. Their reality then confirms the stories as true. Finding a partner is hard, for example. Or all men (or transgender women) are so-and-so. But ANY stories becomes “true” because that’s how reality happens: through stories we tell.

Collective reality distortion

Then such truths get perpetuated as parents, teachers, religious leaders, peers and society amplify distorted truths as “the way life is”. It’s why so many transgender women fall into the “tranny chaser” story about men who find them attractive.

My client’s mother urged him almost constantly to get a job, finish his education, stop being lazy and be of value. So few understand what Jesus and all the Great Masters offer us, especially parents. I don’t perpetuate distortion. My life proves what Great Masters tell us. I help clients create similar lives.

But that doesn’t mean I always succeed. Sometimes society, family and other opinionators win.

When they do, I know nothing went wrong. Everything under the sun is good. There is no evil. Jesus talked of evil and hell, but he used those concepts at a time when such concepts resonated. Today’s humanity is ready for more complex and accurate metaphors. But even the old ones contain universal accuracy.

Life can be easy. It’s what all the Great Masters offer. Everything one wants can come with no effort. Especially finding love. Humanity owns vast capabilities people today say are impossible. But they’ve never put their assertions to the test. Instead, what they think impossible is that way because others brainwashed them into thinking they’re impossible. Those stories then create the reality where some things show up as impossible. But they’re not. Including “I will never find a man who will love me for me.”

I choose the Charmed Life

Meanwhile, pioneers stand on the leading edge. They offer humanity new realities. I enjoy playing in my sessions with such people.

Abraham contrasted struggle with the leading edge in a recent email I got from them. The email prompted this post. Here’s what it said:

Most people…equate results with struggle. And so, you sort of wear your struggle like a badge of honor. And all of that is opposite of allowing the Well-being.

There’s nothing wrong with working hard. Just as there’s nothing wrong crossing the country by foot. But wouldn’t you really rather fly? I would. And if instant teleportation was available wouldn’t you rather do that? I sure would.

While I welcome anyone wishing greater joy and ease in their life, I relish working with folks who choose to fly. Flying is the start. From there everything becomes possible. Having a life one loves means not subscribing to stories others foist on us. It’s the life lived according to the Great Masters. A life that can show that anything is possible.

It’s the Charmed Life I write about. The life opposite the dark side.

Which life are you choosing?

September 27, 2022August 17, 2022

The Great Joy Of Living As Trans

I wrote the following to a client but it applies generally to all trans and trans-attracted people:

Remember Susan (not her real name). You’re not on the way to any goal. You’re greatest joy is in authentic expression. You came to earth because you knew that. So that’s what you’re here for: Every moment expressing who you are…and by doing so improving the world. You, just like everyone else, got stuck in conditions you chose. You chose them because they offer the best combination of “what is” and what you want. So condemn nothing, including yourself, where you are, your job and everything else. Instead, find beauty and joy in everything and you’ll gradually come into your full, glorious, authentic expression.

This transgender woman took that advice then created her professional photography career. She is now off to a great start in that field.

The same thing can happen for any transgender person. Great joy awaits each person, trans or trans-attracted. That’s why we all choose to come into physical life. Because we knew it would be a wonderful, joyful experience.

Why doesn’t it look that way?

But nearly all of us get off track when we come into the world. That happens because the world is full of ideas running contrary to what’s really happening. People who came before us forgot what they knew before getting here. So they’re afraid, insecure in themselves and worried about all kinds of things.

We can’t get here except through other people. When we come that way, we also can’t help but adopt their insecurities, fears and worries as our own.

So, just like them, we try fitting in. We try to belong somewhere. We try becoming something we’re not. But why? Why do we do that?

It’s scary feeling alone. It’s scary not fitting in. But that scary feeling exists to remind us what we knew when we decided to come here. It reminds us that we’re worthy. It reminds us that we’re powerful beings who came for the joy. We came for the joy, to stand out, not fit in. But we came for so much more also.

We all get off track on the way to the joy we knew awaited us. Some never get back on track. If you’re reading this, though, you can get back on track. Do that and you’ll find the joy you knew awaited you here.

Love, happiness and joy is everyone’s birthright. Especially transgender and trans-attracted people. But when we listen to others or society and adopt their beliefs, it’s easy to get off track. (Photo by Sherise VD on Unsplash)

The joy is in uniqueness

We came here for that joy but also to move humanity and the world into places its never been before. That’s the purpose of all creation: becoming more than it is at any given time.

Being transgender and trans-attracted offers that expansion into more. But that expansion depends on transgender and trans-attracted people living authentically. That means standing out. That means accepting one’s unique place in the world, taking up space as that, and proudly expressing one’s authenticity in the world.

It’s easy to instead try to “fit in”. A lot of societal pressure will try to keep authentic beings from their authentic lives. But for those who dare, for those who live life their way, life will support their authenticity.

Living any other way is compromise and bound to end in dissatisfaction. That’s why so many people, regret their lives. Or they live lives of anxiety with a nagging that says “is this all there is to life?”

There is far more to life. Having that “far more” requires living authentic, original expressions of what we are, trans and trans-attracted. It requires expressing our uniqueness.

Expressing joy: a prerequisite

Like attracts like. Many people struggle with this. Especially trans and trans-attracted people. Getting what one wants requires becoming a match to that. That means, to enjoy a life of love and passion with someone who accepts one as one is, one must FIRST ACCEPT WHO AND WHAT THEY ARE. The best indicator of how much one accepts themselves is the amount of joy they feel.

Joy often comes fleetingly through people’s lives. Rarely does it hang around. Usually, it comes in surprising flashes, seemingly out of the blue. Boredom, annoyance, frustration, dissatisfaction and anxiety represent many people’s default life conditions. Such conditions exist in great quantities in the trans community, including among trans-attracted people.

But for those who make joy their objective, those people’s lives will reflect joy back to them. That must include joyful people. And it must also include joyful love.

So joy is the go-to place from which everything everyone wants arrives. The greatest joy comes from that experience wherein one loves themselves for EVERYTHING they are. Including the life they have, however it looks.

Find that kind of joy and relationships and love from others becomes irrelevant. Ironically, when one finds that place, love and relationships come easy because the person matches what they want. See? That’s the paradox.

To get what one wants, one must make themselves a match to it. For transgender and trans-attracted people, that means proudly living as trans and trans-attracted. Doing that is simple. But getting there takes practice because most of us don’t live authentically.

I can help with that.

September 20, 2022August 4, 2022

How Good Really Is The Transamorous Network’s Advice?

An Instagram follower offered an interesting perspective. It shows how powerful stories are. She suggested our content was superficial and didn’t take into account “nuance” that comes with being trans, particularly being both trans and a Person of Color (POC).

Indeed, she went so far as to suggest the person writing our content is cis, and being so, knows nothing about the plight of transgender people:

She is wrong on both counts.

Stories matter a lot

It’s interesting when people double down on their disempowerment as a way of trying to show us that what we offer can’t possibly work. “Complications” exist in every perspective. Such complications play no factor in how things happen in life…unless the life-liver invites them to play a factor.

A person invites such complications to have an effect on life by believing they have an effect. Just like this Instagram follower.

If a POC believes their status as a POC influences their life experience, it’s very hard to have an experience where that status doesn’t have an influence. I’m not saying such status doesn’t have an influence. What I am saying is, that influence is inconsequential when one takes control of stories they’re telling about such status, or any other limiting factor.

Results speak louder

The fact is, our clients find powerful lives through following our advice. So powerful is our advice that even POC find empowering lives. Here are results from actual clients, some of whom face the same apparent “nuances” this person suggests invalidates what we offer:

One transgender female client, who also is a person of color, credits this practice for keeping her from committing suicide.
Another transgender woman of color created a three-year marriage. She’s still in that marriage today, to a cis-gender male POC.
Yet another transgender woman is finding her way out of “online dating hell”. She’s discovering more happiness and hope that she can find a lover.
Still another created her dream career in photography through what we offer.
Meanwhile a trans-attracted guy who tried to kill himself three different times found liberation from suicide ideation. He now pursues his college education, and a career in show business!
Finally, another trans-attracted guy found greater peace and happiness within himself. Every week he discovers powerful insights leading to greater confidence and self-acceptance.

Nuance is a story. As is thinking skin color makes a difference in having what one wants. Neither nuance or skin color need determine one’s experience. Unless one believes they do. Everyone can enjoy a life in which everything they want happens. It’s just a matter of telling stories consistent with that rather than stories complaining or criticizing life.

We show clients how to do that. As a result, they become exceptions to the rules. They get what they want and they find happiness. Ready to find yours?

September 13, 2022July 26, 2022

Depression Can Be A Transgender Person’s Best Friend

If you are experiencing life-threatening circumstances and don’t want to die, you should seek professional advice.

Depression can easily overtake transgender and trans-attracted people. When someone wants something really bad – like a body reflecting who they know themselves to be, or a lover they believe doesn’t exist – the negative stories that person tells about their desire can drive the person into helplessness.

In helplessness – feeling no ability to get what one wants – hopelessness isn’t far behind. Hopelessness is different from helplessness. Helplessness is about feeling no ability to help one’s self. Hopelessness, on the other hand, is a sense that NO ONE can help the person achieve the desire.

Depression can follow long bouts with these two states. Depression, as many know, is an inward-directed, unexpressed anger. As we all also know, depression can debilitate. It’s so powerful, and so many suffer from its conditions, society spends billions on therapeutic interventions to help those chronically “stuck” in such states.

But helplessness, hopelessness and depression are all positive emotional states. This post explains specifically how depression is beneficial. But it can be read as an extension to apply to all emotions, including helplessness and hopelessness.

What is depression?

Many think they understand depression. Especially depressed people. But if they really understood what depression is, they wouldn’t find themselves stuck in it. So let’s look at what depression really is.

Depression is a signal the depressed person is sending themselves. Most people don’t understand this, so instead of listening to the signal and doing something about it, they instead “cover up the signal.”

Let’s say you’re coming up to a railroad crossing. A train is coming. The lights on your side of the tracks are flashing red.

Would you cross the tracks when the light says stop? (Photo by Jude Infantini on Unsplash)

Would you ignore the signal and cross the track? Of course not. You’d get killed.

Depression is like the flashing light. It is telling the depressed person something. The depressed person should stop and take action based on what the signal is saying.

But most depressed people receive the signal and don’t know what it’s saying. So they keep doing what they’re doing instead of doing what the signal is telling them to do (in this case, changing the stories the person is telling. More on that in a bit).

What depression tells people

Most depressed people will disagree with this, but it doesn’t make it less accurate: Depression is not that serious. It’s just a really strong signal.

It just so happens that, as signals go, it’s one of the most intense. Usually, a person who experiences depression was oblivious to earlier, less intense signals received on the way to “depression”.

In other words, they didn’t listen to the less-intense signals, so now they’re getting one of the most intense.

Had they heeded the less intense ones, they wouldn’t have ended up depressed. And, it would have been easier to do something about the signal.

So what is this signal telling the depressed person? It’s telling them they have beliefs and thoughts that are at odds with the “what-is-ness” of life. That’s all it is.

The dominant state of All That Is is positive expansion, eagerness, enthusiasm, joy, ecstasy, etc. It knows everything is always working out towards positive expansion, fulfillment, expression, awareness, etc. This is not theoretical or just “spiritual”. It is the actual state of things.

Depression tells the depressed person something important. Most of them miss that message though. (Photo by Hailey Kean)

Beauty, positivity and joy available everywhere

Humans create their reality. They can create any reality they want. When they are creating reality consistent with what they are as physical embodiments of All That Is, they resonate or feel in tune with All That Is.

How does that feel? It feels positive, expansionary, eager, enthusiastic, joyful, ecstatic, fulfilled, etc.

But when a person creates a reality inconsistent with all the above, they feel consistent with that creation. Anger, frustration, annoyance….all the way down to depression.

Feelings are important. Many people don’t understand their function as signals. They help a person know what they are creating.

So a person who feels depressed has chronically created a reality inconsistent with what they are. Reality creation occurs first in vibration, then in thought form, then in a received thought before the creation becomes physical reality. In each of those stages, an emotion/feeling is received by the person doing the creating. This helps the person catch their creation early on, before it springs into physical reality.

In short, at The Transamorous Network, we refer to this reality-creation process as “telling stories”.

Feelings help keep us on track

If a person keeps telling stories, and thus, creating reality along lines inconsistent with All That Is, eventually they will get harsher or more and more intense signals…until they get the message. Depression, then, is not anything mysterious or serious. It is only a signal a person is receiving.

This example may be illustrative.

Let’s say as a child, a young woman, was sexually abused by her father. The first time it happened, the child may have felt out of sorts. By the fifth or so time it happened, her internal awareness that something is not right is already in high gear.

Now, she has an opportunity to act. She knows what to do, even though she’s a little girl. But she doesn’t because she’s unclear.

That’s the first, and lightest, signal: lack of clarity or confusion.

Now, let’s say the father threatens her. Let’s say he says “you tell your mom and I’m going to kill you.” Or something less extreme: “honey, keep this a secret between you and me. Don’t tell your mom.”

The young girl knows intuitively she should say something. But now she’s confused because her dad is telling her to keep this secret.

Uncertainty momentum creates more momentum

So the situation continues. She starts feeling more uncertainty. That’s a signal.

Note that this little girl’s mood will change. She’ll gradually lose the joy, freedom, happiness and enthusiasm for life. These emotions go away because her thoughts or stories are turning to beliefs – “conclusions about her world” and about what she has experienced:

“this should not be happening”
“I don’t understand”
“I don’t want this to happen any more”
“I feel out of control”
“I feel like this is wrong”

Eventually, this clarity will turn on itself and she will begin thinking different thoughts or telling different stories:

“I’m angry at my dad”
“I hate my dad”

Then she will turn her thoughts/stories on herself:

“This is my fault”
“I must have done something to deserve this”
“I’m a bad person for letting this happen”

The positive, constructive anger expressed at her dad is now turned inward on herself. Action she could have taken to express her anger, or even earlier, her lack of understanding (which is a very light signal), now is not available.

Self blame turns to discouragement about life. Discouragement turns to anger (at herself), anger turns to rage (at herself and her dad and perhaps her mom for not noticing and stopping him) which extends to life in general. Rage at life in general turns to insecurity/guilt/unworthiness.

Less intense signals ignored become more intense signals

Now, in this “vibration” where signals being received are insecurity/guilt/unworthiness, the young woman, who may be in high school by now, is long into creating a reality matching these signals. The momentum of that reality is so strong by now, it’s pretty much running the show.

As a result, this young woman may experience increasingly “negative” life experiences. But these are just signals too. She may start doing poorly in school. Or she might show behavior problems. Maybe she puts on a lot of weight, eating too much. Or she starves herself becoming paper thin. She may start taking drugs. She may dress a particular way, or hang out with people who resonate with this reality she creates.

These life experiences, which she is creating, also generate a feedback loop. The more she remains in this state and does not do anything about the signals, the more of these kinds of experiences she will have.

By now she might even create situations where she is further sexually abused. She may be raped. She may turn to prostitution. Or she may develop other signals we call “illnesses” such as Fibromyalgia, PTSD, “anxiety disorder” or other “traumas”. All of these are signals, not to others, to herself. Spiritually, emotions are the earliest signals. If ignored, the next level activates: life experiences show up as “louder” signals.

The process works either way. Beliefs create the world you want to see, or the world consistent with your beliefs. That’s why it’s better to bring into alignment your beliefs (your stories) and what you want to see.

Vicious circle born of ignorance

If she tries to treat the signals, masking them by taking drugs or drinking, that’s like trying to turn off the lights at the railroad crossing. She doesn’t get to the foundation of all her life troubles: underlying thoughts and beliefs the signals are pointing to.

If she is oblivious to the connection between her signals and her experiences, she will think the experiences are independent of her and the signals. She’ll compound her problematic beliefs, thinking:

“Men are scum”
“The world is scary”
“I’m afraid”

And create more thoughts consistent with her experience:

“I’m a loser”
“These are the only friends I can get”
“Sex is my only value”
“I’ll disappear by eating”

At any time in this process the young woman can turn all this around. But it’s easier to do it in the early stages than it is after reality begins matching the signals.

By the time one reaches the depression signal, turning things around takes longer.

Reversal: omnipresent and available

BTW, all this is subtle. This is why counseling can help because it uncovers many of the original beliefs and experiences that generated the early stage signals. But a person doesn’t need counseling. They can turn this around themselves by focusing on how they’re thinking and change that while paying attention to the signals they’re getting – their feelings and their physical life experiences.

So depression acts as an indicator, helping the creator get back on track when they veer off course. People get stuck in depression (or other negative emotion) when they don’t understand what purpose emotions serve.

The good news is changing course gets really easy with a little practice. And when a person changes their stories about life experience, life experience becomes the Charmed Life I write about. A text from a client who once was on the verge of suicide shows this:

The interesting thing is, the intensity of negative emotion indicates the equal opposite intensity of desire. In other words, those most depressed possess the potential for some of the greatest joys. Their depression indicates HUGE opportunity. If only they turn their stories around.

“Depression”, the signal, can produce great good. For when a person knows what’s shared here and takes action based on it, great good will follow. That’s guaranteed because that’s how the Universe works.

Want to learn more? Schedule a free 1:1 and let’s talk.