I wrote the following to a client but it applies generally to all trans and trans-attracted people:
Remember Susan (not her real name). You’re not on the way to any goal. You’re greatest joy is in authentic expression. You came to earth because you knew that. So that’s what you’re here for: Every moment expressing who you are…and by doing so improving the world. You, just like everyone else, got stuck in conditions you chose. You chose them because they offer the best combination of “what is” and what you want. So condemn nothing, including yourself, where you are, your job and everything else. Instead, find beauty and joy in everything and you’ll gradually come into your full, glorious, authentic expression.
This transgender woman took that advice then created her professional photography career. She is now off to a great start in that field.
The same thing can happen for any transgender person. Great joy awaits each person, trans or trans-attracted. That’s why we all choose to come into physical life. Because we knew it would be a wonderful, joyful experience.
Why doesn’t it look that way?
But nearly all of us get off track when we come into the world. That happens because the world is full of ideas running contrary to what’s really happening. People who came before us forgot what they knew before getting here. So they’re afraid, insecure in themselves and worried about all kinds of things.
We can’t get here except through other people. When we come that way, we also can’t help but adopt their insecurities, fears and worries as our own.
So, just like them, we try fitting in. We try to belong somewhere. We try becoming something we’re not. But why? Why do we do that?
It’s scary feeling alone. It’s scary not fitting in. But that scary feeling exists to remind us what we knew when we decided to come here. It reminds us that we’re worthy. It reminds us that we’re powerful beings who came for the joy. We came for the joy, to stand out, not fit in. But we came for so much more also.
We all get off track on the way to the joy we knew awaited us. Some never get back on track. If you’re reading this, though, you can get back on track. Do that and you’ll find the joy you knew awaited you here.
Love, happiness and joy is everyone’s birthright. Especially transgender and trans-attracted people. But when we listen to others or society and adopt their beliefs, it’s easy to get off track. (Photo by Sherise VD on Unsplash)
The joy is in uniqueness
We came here for that joy but also to move humanity and the world into places its never been before. That’s the purpose of all creation: becoming more than it is at any given time.
Being transgender and trans-attracted offers that expansion into more. But that expansion depends on transgender and trans-attracted people living authentically. That means standing out. That means accepting one’s unique place in the world, taking up space as that, and proudly expressing one’s authenticity in the world.
It’s easy to instead try to “fit in”. A lot of societal pressure will try to keep authentic beings from their authentic lives. But for those who dare, for those who live life their way, life will support their authenticity.
Living any other way is compromise and bound to end in dissatisfaction. That’s why so many people, regret their lives. Or they live lives of anxiety with a nagging that says “is this all there is to life?”
There is far more to life. Having that “far more” requires living authentic, original expressions of what we are, trans and trans-attracted. It requires expressing our uniqueness.
Expressing joy: a prerequisite
Like attracts like. Many people struggle with this. Especially trans and trans-attracted people. Getting what one wants requires becoming a match to that. That means, to enjoy a life of love and passion with someone who accepts one as one is, one must FIRST ACCEPT WHO AND WHAT THEY ARE. The best indicator of how much one accepts themselves is the amount of joy they feel.
Joy often comes fleetingly through people’s lives. Rarely does it hang around. Usually, it comes in surprising flashes, seemingly out of the blue. Boredom, annoyance, frustration, dissatisfaction and anxiety represent many people’s default life conditions. Such conditions exist in great quantities in the trans community, including among trans-attracted people.
But for those who make joy their objective, those people’s lives will reflect joy back to them. That must include joyful people. And it must also include joyful love.
So joy is the go-to place from which everything everyone wants arrives. The greatest joy comes from that experience wherein one loves themselves for EVERYTHING they are. Including the life they have, however it looks.
Find that kind of joy and relationships and love from others becomes irrelevant. Ironically, when one finds that place, love and relationships come easy because the person matches what they want. See? That’s the paradox.
To get what one wants, one must make themselves a match to it. For transgender and trans-attracted people, that means proudly living as trans and trans-attracted. Doing that is simple. But getting there takes practice because most of us don’t live authentically.
The best way to create a better dating life starts with learning how to do nothing. When people discover the power of doing nothing, life really starts taking off. And dates people have get better and better.
This is especially true for those looking for that perfect mate. Transgender and trans-attracted people struggle finding love because they’re caught up in the “doing disease”. It literally feels like that. Dis-ease.
We think all we need “to do” is do more of what others are doing and we’ll find our mate. So that’s what we do. We go to bars. Maybe we ask friends to hook us up. But the one thing so many do while infected with “doing disease” is pursuing a partner via online dating.
I know that path personally. Over the early part of my life I probably spent something like seven thousand dollars subscribed to various online dating sites. That includes transgender-specific ones. I spent another five thousand or so on other match-making alternatives. That was before I discovered a far more powerful way to fall in love: telling powerful stories.
Doing is drudgery
Before that discovery, I was caught up in doing too. And doing had me doing what everyone else did. It worked. Sometimes. Looking back, though, the success rate of all that doing wasn’t very high. It wasn’t any fun either in retrospect.
No one really likes getting on dating sites in order to find love. It’s a lot of work and money. But it’s crazy how many people go there. So few actually find what they want that way, yet, so many go that way and struggle through sucky experiences.
I’ve asked my clients which they’d prefer: meeting their match in their daily life, on the way to the grocery or while in a park for example, or meeting them on line. Every one agrees they’d prefer meeting them in real life.
Why do so many go through that drudgery then? Maybe it’s because they’re trapped in the doing the disease like I was. I’m glad I found the way out. The way out being doing nothing. It seems crazy, but it’s true. Here’s why.
So many people tire themselves out by trying to get what they want through action. But doing nothing begins a path where things happen far more easily. No struggle required. (Photo by Adrian Swancar)
You match what you’re getting
First, the reason why so many seek their partner through doing, yet fail to find them, is because they’re trying to get something they don’t believe they can have. I talk about this with every client. A person can’t find something they think they can’t find. That’s the case for keys, lost gloves and partners one think doesn’t exist.
How can someone find a partner if they think that partner doesn’t exist? That’s the belief in which many transgender and trans-attracted people stand. So many transgender people think they can’t find a guy who will love them for what they are. So many trans-attracted guys think transgender women of the kind they want, don’t exist. And yet, both parties do, do, do, while not knowing their doing doubles down on their negative thoughts about what they want.
Worse still, how can a person find someone to love if they believe they themselves aren’t lovable? Many transgender women struggle with believing they are worthy of what they want. A lot think they love themselves. But track what comes out of their mouths and in short order overwhelming evidence piles up. That evidence shows what that trans woman really feels about herself.
Same goes with trans-attracted men. Although it’s much easier seeing the evidence. We trans-attracted men struggle with shame and embarrassment about our attraction, but also about our desires. We’re insecure about what our desires tell us about ourselves. And so we struggle too.
Insecurities proceed us all
The fact is, if a person doesn’t think their partner exists, or they don’t think they deserve finding them, they’re not going to.
So when such a person goes online to find their partner, armed with such beliefs and insecurities, they draw to them experiences confirming their beliefs and insecurities. They meet skeezer trans women, cavort with call girls and escorts and get had by gold diggers. Or they meet men who only want to sext, see dick picks or ghost the minute online conversations turn to meeting in person.
When people get these responses, they ignore what these experiences tell them. Instead, they try harder, do more, push, struggle more. They think if they do all that, they’ll finally get what they want.
It doesn’t work that way. Especially in love.
Finding love is easy when you give up the struggle. Even if you’re trans or trans-attracted. (Photo by Juliette F on Unsplash)
Doing it different?
Doing nothing begins an important process. That process reverses inertia created when a person keeps doing the same thing over and over, while expecting different results. When someone calms themselves, relaxes and focuses inward, powerful processes get underway even though it seems like nothing happens.
And the more that person relaxes into doing nothing, the more effective they get. That’s because every person, trans or trans-attracted, receives guidance through their intuition. Doing nothing tunes one into their intuition.
What really happens is, by doing nothing, the person calms down noise in their head. That way they start hearing clear signals their intuition sends all day, every day.
In time, the person realizes some profound insights. Like this client:
Uncovering such insights takes a while. And this is the challenge. So many people in our lives tell us doing nothing is lazy and time wasting. But it’s not that. It’s a profound state of being which tunes one back into their deeper knowing.
But if you listen to society, parents, educators and all those loud mouths in the peanut gallery, you’ll hear “stop being lazy”, “work harder”, “success is in the struggle”.
It works but it’s tough
Such approaches work. But do you really want to struggle through life? I don’t. I’d rather enjoy life while seeing my life bringing me everything I want with little effort.
People who struggle claim it’s worth the struggle. They look at and display scars they “earned” on the way to their success. I say give that approach up, especially when it comes to finding love.
Instead, figure out how to become a match to the relationship, that lasting, loving, true love you want. It’s far more fun, easier, and when it shows up, will be a better match. That’s because on the way to receiving it, you’re becoming a match to it. You’re becoming happy. You’re letting go of your pessimism and joylessness. You let go of blame and judgement.
And when all that happens, you can’t help but meet someone who is just like you. After all, in all that doing to find a partner, the judgement, pessimism, and joylessness you experience is what you get in return in the form of partners matching all of that.
A better way exists. It starts with doing nothing, which really is doing a lot. Learning to do nothing transforms lives. My clients know this. It’s time for you to know it too.
There’s great power in managing vibration so that one stands in a high flying state. Doing so through positive storytelling one can literally shape others’ experiences. One can also shape other people. A powerful example of that happened this week with a Transamorous Network trans-attracted client.
This client finds himself profoundly affected by what he’s learned. He started four months ago. So he enjoys some proficiency with positive storytelling. But this week, like many clients, he came having had a rough few days. So when he showed up to the session, he wasn’t ready for what happened.
When I help clients attain a high proficiency with telling stories, I create a vibrational bubble in which I hold the session. Every session feels the same because of this. The high vibrational state I create then hold during the session “pulls” clients from wherever they are, to where I am. That’s why, unlike traditional therapyor counseling, every client enjoys extremely satisfying sessions containing powerful insights and breakthroughs.
A compelling offer
This time, however, I brought a lot more vibrational mastery to the table than usual. That’s because I meditated prior to the session, using a process which increases one’s vibrational focus. I also used another process because I wanted to amplify the great feeling I felt after meditation.
By the time I came to the session, I was bouncing off the walls with intense, positivity, appreciation and joy. So much so, the client’s socks got blown off.
The disparity between where he was and where I was was so great, he had to join me. He literally had no choice because my mastery was so strong. So when the client came into my bubble, his negative vibration had no place to go but outta here! 😂.
Which is why, after the session, he sent this:
Creating people on demand
When it comes to relationships, especially romantic ones, most people try to manipulate, convince, “love” (it’s not really that), bribe, blackmail or blame their partners into being someone they can be happy with. That hardly ever works.
Indeed, the whole idea of “love languages” is part of the problem with relationships. Expecting someone to be a certain way so you feel better is a recipe for disaster. It’s also not loving.
Loving is unconditional. That means, no matter how a person might be, you still love them. That’s hard when vibrational mastery eludes you.
But with vibrational mastery, not only can you love a person no matter how they are, when you do, THEY CHANGE.
The best way to change someone is to tell better stories about them. When you do, you “vibe” with the version of the person you want to experience. Then the person you’re with changes into that person. Better stories about that person make that possible. In the process you also feel fucking great!
Trying to change people through action or words hardly ever works. When it does work, it rarely lasts. It often also creates resentment. But using stories, you can make any change you want permanent. And people love you for it.
It’s just like what my client experienced. And I wasn’t even trying!
Want a powerful relationship with those you love, those you work with and those you care about? Stop trying to change them. Tell better stories about them, become a match to their best self. Then, watch how much power you have to create people on demand.
There’s no doubt in my mind positive stories about life get me everything I want in life. Such a life sounds magical, like wishful thinking, as someone once put it.
But when Transamorous Network clients put the practice to the test, they produce exact same results. They’re guaranteed, of course, because nothing contradicts tenets upon which “Stories create reality” rests. Nonetheless, it’s so cool seeing when clients produce results that seem, well, supernatural.
My newest client came to the practice battling suicidal thoughts that had him in a panic about his life. He’d experienced several “tragedies” in the last two years. He also had resisted sexual desires he considered illegitimate. As a result of negative story telling about those things, he wound up considering life as not worth living. That’s when he contacted me.
Now, in only 11 sessions over 5 weeks, he not only is convinced his Broader Perspective is real, he’s creating mind blowing life experiences. These experiences convince him he’s revealing to himself his own version of the Charmed Life. Soon transgender women will show up wherever he goes, proving his Broader Perspective can create any experience. Including having transgender women show up where, apparently, there aren’t any.
My newest client realizing for himself that what I share is accurate.
Creating “supernatural shit”
Meanwhile, my client continues practicing stories which connect him with the Source of his Charmed Life: his Broader Perspective. The results astonish him.
Two days ago, for example, (at the time of this writing) this client and I had a great session. In it we talked about “tragedies” I touched on above. We started picking at them, turning around negative stories he told about them, so freedom from negative emotion could show up for him.
That night he texted me. I didn’t read it until the next morning. His text described quite an event:
My client expressed at the end of his text what many people believe. They believe this kind of thing belongs in the “supernatural” or random categories of experiences. But supernatural just means “beyond the scientific understandings of the laws of nature”. And nothing ever is random.
I say repeatedly: science is very limited in what it knows. But its believers and practitioners believe it is the only source of dependable knowledge. So when something shows up that exists as real, but outside science’s narrow scope, science’s believers and practitioners will assert the thing false because science hasn’t blessed it as true. 🙄
But most of what humans want to know lies outside the scope of science. Why is there so much suffering, why do I seem to not fit in, why do I like this sexual practice mainstream society thinks is deviant? These meaty questions science can’t answer. Or they try by turning things into diseases and mental disorders and then medicate the experiencer to numb them back into the mainstream where they’re less likely to rock the boat.
Experiences like my client had that night may seem supernatural. But they distinguish the Charmed Life from ordinary life. In that life, the Charmed Life, one experiences things like this all the time.
Revelry for revelry’s sake
I enjoy living the Charmed Life. Part of that joy involves showing others how to create their versions of that life. Doing that, clients and I revel in the results. We don’t revel because of the results though. We revel because reveling feels great.
And when we revel, we focus. By focusing on the revelry, we seed future experiences worthy of future revelry. Such as meeting one’s ideal match.
Nothing compares to the Charmed Life. My clients get it and want more. So do I of course. Want to cultivate your own? I got your back!
Everyone lives in the past. That seems like nonsense, but bear with me as I describe why that is. With just a little practice telling positive stories under their belt – about yourself and the world surrounding you – you’ll realize how accurate that statement is. But if you don’t see life through telling positive stories, “everyone lives in the past” sounds like nonsense.
But it’s not. The reason everyone lives in the past is because they, through science and traditional education, learn a screwy perspective.
We’re all taught “the present” is where we live. Things that happened “before” – that’s they past, we’re told. Things that haven’t happened – that’s the future. So people strive to live in the “present”, that place standing in between this commonly accepted past and future.
The best, and most satisfying way to live though lines up with breaking free of traditional, common knowledge. Stepping out of traditional, commonly accepted knowledge, turns hum-drum, ordinary, uninspiring lives into lives where all your dreams happen. Including dreams of finding your perfect partner, whether you’re transgender or trans-attracted.
Why change perspectives?
Getting that partner means changing perspectives. It seems we live in the “present”, in the “now”, our current experience. Birds fly about. Dogs bark. Cars whoosh by. Winds blow through trees. Yep, that looks like the present. From a universal perspective though, this is not the present.
This is the past. It represents stories – thoughts and beliefs – that have happened already. From a universal perspective, which is the same perspective your Broader Perspective has, humanity’s commonly believed “present” is not the present or the now. It is the past. It’s manifestED.
Why is this so important? How does one benefit by changing perspective?
It’s important because every human is a creator. They create by observing, then telling stories about what they observe. Conclusions, thoughts, desires, preferences…they all represent the same thing: Stories. Stories represent cosmic focus, which channeled, moves all of creation toward immediately fulfilling the story as it’s told.
That means, when a person looks at what people commonly agree is the present, which is past manifestation, and they conclude randomly about that, they create more of what’s manifested in a random manner. That’s why the world seems to mostly stay as it is.
All kinds of things happen in the manifestED version of life, which is the past. But it’s the manifestING version of life everyone knew they wanted to live in when they decided to become human. (Photo by Aditya Vyas)
“No” means “yes”
So if a person or a group doesn’t like what they see, and they rail against that, they create more of that. Pushing against anything already manifestED means giving attention to and focus on that. Again, attention begins the process of creation. It doesn’t matter if “attention” one gives sounds like “I don’t like this”. The person giving attention will get what they don’t like. That’s what they’re putting their attention on, after all.
The Universe doesn’t understand English (or any other language). It only understands vibration. Attention is vibration. It doesn’t matter if you look at something and say “I don’t want this”. Your vibration of attention, whether you like what you attend to or not, tells the Universe “give me more of this”.
This is why things like transphobia, TERF-ism, political division and such continue long after people want something better or different. It’s why JK Rowling continues doing and saying what she does and says. Everyone’s looking at what’s happening, then concluding in ways that create more of what they’re looking at.
In other words, they live in the manifested. The past.
Such things take so long to change because humans also stand opposed to what they want, even when they think they are standing in alignment with what they want. Those wanted things are coming and will manifest though. Which is why, often, future generations benefit from what previous generations wanted. While those previous generations die off in a state of not getting what they want.
Then what’s a better way?
People creating their lives consciously know the commonly known present moment is actually the past. They spend little to no attention there. Instead, they stand in the Unfolding Present, the Moment of Becoming, as Seth calls it.
What is the Unfolding Present?
The Unfolding Present is the no-space space from where the new, the manifestING emerges. It is the instantaneous now, each now-moment, fresh and full of creative vitality. And it’s a place one can experience with practice, just like they now experience the commonly-believed present moment, which is the past.
Now all moments contain creative vitality. But the Unfolding Present holds incipient creative vitality. It is the fountain from which creation springs. The Unfoldling Present exists someplace other than physical reality. Which is why telling positive stories is necessary. For the Unfolding Present is purely positive. Telling positive stories aligns one with that.
Figuring it out through play
This “space” that is the Unfolding Present is a state of being. It’s the state in which children dwell before they’re indoctrinated into “growing up”. Some call it the “flow state”, others call it imagination. Children call it “playing”.
How I prefer describing it is that place in which one knows one’s desires are done, and from that knowing, one relaxes into the IS-ness of being. Being there is obvious because that being-state feels WONDERFUL.
Figuring out how to be in that state is hard to grasp. Now you can see why something like The Transamorous Network is required. Usually people need assistance figuring out how to balance playfulness and what people think is “Adulting”.
But getting there is inevitable, because that’s the basis of everyone’s Broader Perspective state. And everyone’s Broader Perspective wants them experiencing the real present moment, the Unfolding Present or the Moment of Becoming.
Most don’t get there until they make their after-death transition. That needn’t be your fate though.
This illustrated guide offers a complete description of the Moment of Becoming, the actual present moment, and its relationship to All That Is. View the complete guide here on our sister site.
The Charmed Life
The reason your Broader Perspective wants you there is because it is from there that all you want unfolds. Whether conscious of it or not, the Moment of Becoming or the Unfolding Present shoots out of you, turning the ManifestED into something else.
For most people, “something else” looks like exactly what they’re looking at or focused on. Which is why the commonly accepted “present” looks stable. It’s also, as I wrote above, why social change happens slowly.
If one remains unconscious of this state, the Charmed Life remains concealed behind random creations, those manifestations springing from the Moment of Becoming that look a lot like everyone’s commonly accepted present or even the commonly accepted past as well as their persistent beliefs or stories. That’s why car makers, for example, often “renew” models they created for the first time decades ago.
Become conscious of this state though, and your foot comes off the brakes. A new momentum reveals itself, as well as a new way of perceiving. Then your Charmed Life reveals itself to you. From there, you discover, or rather rediscover, childhood wonder.
The world looks fresh, new, constantly. And, you also perceive your desires unfolding, including romantic ones. As you focus more there, you give attention to that.
As I wrote above, attention begins the creation process. So attention on what you want, instead of what you don’t, creates what you want, instead of more of what you have, which often is what you don’t want.
When you perceive that always happening, you live the Charmed Life while standing in its Unfolding. Nothing beats that.
The Charmed Life flows from those who practice telling positive stories. There, one discovers the Universe as a wish-granting jewel, through which life becomes easy.
A personal advanced example
This morning as I’m writing this, I’m thrilled with an experience I enjoyed coming from nonphysical. I came to at about 4 a.m.
Laying in bed, I perceived dreams wherein I taught myself an advanced version of what you’re reading about. In the dream, I felt deep satisfaction while standing in the “now” that contains all my current desires. Some of my desires are extraordinary. Some others represent experiences I know will thrill me as they manifest more.
But what I got in the dream state, then amplified while awake in bed, was standing in the fulfillment of those desires is the Moment of Becoming. And when I “stand” there, I don’t feel excitement, or thrill. Instead, I feel a calm, stable knowing. A knowing born from seeing my desires surrounding me, fully manifested.
This state of awareness makes me a match to my FULFILLED desires. Thinking about them as though I want them, as though I don’t have them, has me standing in the manifestED space. There, I can’t have fulfilled desire because if I still want them, I’m focused on the fact that they aren’t there/here.
“Standing where I want them” is where nearly every trans-attracted person and transgender person stands while trying to “find” their lover. Standing there makes it very, very difficult to get that person.
As mentioned, it takes practice being in a body while focused on and living in the Unfolding. But I assure you, the feeling that comes with being there, fully-tuned to one’s Broader Perspective and living witness to one’s Charmed Life is unmatched.
My experience with it lead me to offer what I’ve experienced to others. Now that a stable of clients produce their version of my results, their results confirm and amplify my own. Nothing matches this life, where my spirituality not only is my income, it also generates profound wonder of All That Is.
You can have this too
The upward spiral of the Charmed Life. Every Transamorous Network client eventually ends up here, guaranteed. (Illustration: My own work)
Two of my clients have begun the intermediate practice. They are blown away by experiences they had with earlier stages. Those stages and results they produced acted like positive feedback loops. I wrote about this upward spiral before on my sister site.
When a person discovers this practice, then practices it, early results are instant. But they’re not so convincing because humans get trained out of understanding what’s introduced. Nevertheless everyone gets them, which is why I offer my money-back guarantee.
But those results kick off a process that’s one-way and inevitable. In a short while for some, a while longer for others, those initial results turn into more obvious results.
Taught how to see these, the client gets excited. Then they want more results, so they do the practice more. More practice amplifies their results, which means more and more convincing results happen.
Before long, clients stand convinced the Charmed Life is real. And the more they reach for it, the more it reveals itself. In time, the client is ready for more advanced practice.
Everyone comes into the world knowing the Charmed Life awaits them. But few get there because they accept indoctrination from others who are oblivious to what’s going on.
That’s ok. It’s usually not fatal. But that does lead to mediocre lives.
PS – this post flew from my fingers after using the bathroom. I had felt the impulse come while in the bathroom and, because I practice following such impulses, I experienced delight watching this post flow. Thanks for reading it. I know you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed is manifested unfolding.
