Most transwomen are murdered by men
Many victims know their killer.
Many killers engaged with their victim in a romantic or sexual context prior to killing them. Their violence stemmed from shame, surprise, embarrassment and fear…
So doesn’t it seem that the best approach to keeping transwomen safe, isn’t whipping up a bunch of fear about men, it’s approaching the men and having them realize finding transgender women attractive is NORMAL?
So when you shame a man who is interested in you as a “chaser”, believe it or not, you’re contributing to the amount of violence perpetrated on people like you.
Apparently, transgender actor and activist Jen Richards agrees. In a post on her Instagram, here’s what she had to say:
Want to stop trans murders?
Stop shaming men who like us, stop calling them gay when they’re not, stop watching dudes play us on screen.
Yes, it’s actually a deeply complicated and nearly intractable set of issues at the dangerous intersection of race, class, homophobia, misogyny, and economics, but the thing that most people can DO, right now, no matter who or where they are, is really that simple: stop shaming the men who like us, stop letting us be portrayed by men.
After years of thinking on this issue, listening to survivors of assault, reading the reports, talking to countless trans women/sex workers, that’s the heart of this. Straight men kill trans women partners because other people, and culture as a whole, says it’s gay, less masculine, to be with us.
So shut it down. Shut down every person or conversation that claims trans women are “really” men, every media depiction with men playing us.
If y’all have other ideas, I’d love to hear them. I’ve seen endless “stop trans murders” posts but no suggestions as to how, or any accountability.
This is our work at The Transamorous Network (the first part).
But we don’t do that by beating men over the head, trying to get them to stop what they would naturally do – the same thing many would do – when their stories trigger such behavior. Instead, we tell men how they can have everything they want. Then we show them how. It just so happens the “how” also has them change their stories about themselves and about transwomen. Which can over time lead to fewer violent acts.
Does our method work? We don’t have hard, scientific evidence, yet. But anecdotal evidence is mounting. And that’s all we need to stay encouraged.
Hi, As a trans-attracted man, I can say that I do not like when transgender are played by men. I can related to your post. BTW I reall like your blog !
Thanks Alexis! Please stick around, check out your YouTube Interviews and our Podcast (it’s in iTunes). And, if you’re available this summer, please consider coming to our first-ever event in Portland: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/the-man-on-fire-conference-tickets-31973752354