Stories - The Transamorous Network

October 18, 2022October 19, 2022

When Suicide Is The Best Way To A Better Way

I once contemplated suicide. This was long before I discovered my transamory. In high school, I dated one of the prettiest, most popular girls. One day, she quit dating me. Her parents didn’t approve apparently. Drawings I made of her and I engaged in sexual acts, which her parents found, didn’t help my case…

So much did her parents disapprove that they dropped the bomb, in person…on my mom. They showed up at my home one day and, in no uncertain terms, told mom I wouldn’t see their daughter any more.

My adolescent heart broke. Not knowing what I know now, I thought my youthful world ended right there. What was the point of living without her?

Obviously, I didn’t take my life. It was a momentary blip. The next day, the experience past, I moved on. So did my ex, apparently.

That’s why I understand the dismal place people find themselves where suicide seems logical. Whether trans, trans-attracted, cis or hetero it doesn’t matter. Getting to the place where suicide makes sense sucks. But it needn’t suck. Nor need it be fatal.

Instead, it can be the best launching pad to a better life.

Emotions as divining rods

Suicidal thoughts feel scary. Especially when they sneak up on you. But do they though? Are people contemplating suicide happy one moment, then, voila!, they want to die?

Of course not. Suicidal thoughts usually come to ordinary folk after a long period of gradual, increasingly negative thoughts. As such, suicidal thoughts resemble any other thought and its associated momentum.

Thoughts trigger emotions. Nothing else does that. Anyone can figure this out by watching where their emotions come from. The common refrain that “X made me” sad, or angry or jealous is a lie we tell ourselves constantly. No one makes someone else feel anything. How someone feels depends on thoughts that person thinks about what they’re thinking about. That’s the only source of emotions.

Emotions are crucial. They help tell us many important things about every choice we’re making. Some of the most powerful thoughts humans think happen underneath our awareness. It’s not that they’re “unconscious”. It’s just that the thinker is oblivious to how they’re choosing to think about what they’re thinking about. Emotions, therefore, act as an immediate feedback mechanism for our thought-choices. Not just those we choose “unconsciously”, but ones we consciously choose too.

Emotions also tell a person what’s coming in the future. Yes, they’re a kind of divining rod, accurately and constantly predicting the future before the future comes.

But since most people don’t know this, they end up feeling chronically anxious, worried, doubtful, insecure and depressed. Then they’re frightened when suicidal thoughts show up. Thoughts they could avoid completely had they used their emotions, humans’ natural divining rod, appropriately.

Most people don’t understand emotions’ purpose. So they can’t fully benefit from their emotions. (Photo by K. Mitch Hodge on Unsplash)

Negative thoughts start it

Negative thoughts, and their associated emotions, essentially tell the thinker “stop how you’re thinking or you won’t like what comes next!”

Suicidal thoughts do the same, but at volume 10. They say “Dude! Wake the fuck up! You’re heading somewhere you’re not going to like!” That’s why thoughts about killing one’s self feel so awful. If someone thinking about suicide looks back across their “thinking” history, they will find a succession of increasingly negative conclusions about life, themselves or some situation. They’ve been thinking thoughts on a variety of subjects that are grossly inaccurate. And they’ve felt increasingly awful-feeling emotions along the way.

So suicidal thoughts usually indicate a strong momentum of negative thinking (long held beliefs) leading to feeling unworthy, powerless, hopeless and depression; all emotions signaling immediate action is needed.

People generally panic or they double down when such thoughts happen because they don’t know how they happened or where they come from. So they don’t know what to do when they show up (that’s powerlessness), which exacerbates their feeling out of control (that’s helplessness). That triggers more fear and powerlessness and lack of control. See how that momentum builds up?

But such thoughts can be reversed with very little effort.

A client who had suicidal ideation found near-complete relief from such thoughts after one session.

What happens after the act

A hopeless or depressed person who kills themselves ends up where everyone else who dies ends up. They return to where they came, a place I call “nonphysical”. There, they remember everything they forgot when they became human. They remember they are an eternal being. Their awareness expands back into the Broader Perspective that guided them while in a physical body. They realize there’s far more to what they are than life on earth.

They also return to the pure positive, joyful energy being that is their natural state. In that state they also realize something else. They get that their exit from the life trajectory they chose was premature. They also see that, like a bad dream, experiences they feared were of their own making. A path they created that, had they kept walking, would have improved.

Human life experience offers so much rich and satisfying opportunity. It literally changes the being experiencing it in profound ways. It does the same for everyone involved.

The experience offers such profound opportunity, a being standing in nonphysical finds it irresistible. That’s why so many humans and other living creatures incarnate.

Post-suicide, these realizations deeply move the person. They remember the profound reason they chose human existence. That reason compels them so completely, they find themselves drawn right back into another body to resume the process they began. The process leading to profound transformation and elevation.

This doesn’t happen against their will. The happening happens because the being, the eternal being, knows what this experience offers. And it wants that.

Life offers profound transformation and elevation. (Photo by Liam Pozz on Unsplash)

A temporary fix at best

So suicide offers at best a temporary respite from a chronic series of interpretations that ran counter to what really happened. Instead of seeing their life unfolding in a beautiful, perfect, divinely-timed unfolding designed by them, they saw it as an awful experience over which they had no control.

Such distorted interpretations usually don’t lead to suicide. Otherwise far more people would kill themselves than do. Suicide happens less frequently because, most of the time, human consciousness, guided by its Broader Perspective enjoys an underlying propensity towards “good”. Inner guidance steps in well before the train gets near careening off its track.

Transgender people who commit suicide are no exception. Pain they experience before the act is self-generated. Taking one’s life releases the person from pain. But not from the joyful path they took on. Suicide represents a short detour before returning to finish what they started.

In the midst of suicidal thoughts, killing one’s self seems like a good idea. But it only prolongs the inevitable. (Photo by Kristina Tripkovic on Unsplash)

Suicidal thinking’s great potential

Killing one’s self looks bad and wrong and scary. But it’s none of these things. At worse, it’s a temporary detour. At best, it offers a reset for the eternal individual. A chance to recover that awesome awareness state from which the human journey began.

Ultimately, all paths lead to fulfilled desire and expansion of All That Is. No one need experience emotions leading to suicide. Such thoughts usually resolve themselves with just a little attention paid to creating other thoughts aligned with one’s Broader Perspective.

People thinking about killing themselves possess tremendous energy. Such people can transform then channel that energy towards their desires. In other words, a person contemplating suicide enjoys tremendous potential.

I help people learn to channel that energy. I show them how to improve their story telling. After that anything becomes possible. That’s what life holds for everyone. Unlimited possibilities available to all. That’s what makes life so worth living.

I think anyone would enjoy that. Why wouldn’t they? Because most people don’t realize how good life can be. I love helping folks realize life’s goodness.

Thinking about committing suicide? Get help by dialing 988 in the US.

October 11, 2022August 29, 2022

When A Trans-Attracted Guy Teaches Me Something Great

Sometimes I’ll learn something great from clients. They come looking for relief from shame and embarrassment about being Trans-attracted. Or transgender women will come to me looking for freedom from a steady stream dating experiences that suck.

All clients, whether trans or trans-attracted seek something they know they’ll feel better if they get it. I’m focused on creating lives – for myself and others – that include everything wanted flowing effortlessly. I know this is possible. So clients who stick with me eventually get that, because that’s the story I’m committed to. They eventually relax into their trans-attraction, or their status as a transgender person. Then they get the wonderful life that is naturally theirs.

The process through which that happens often teaches me things too. That’s one reason I love this practice. It’s a non-ending series of expansionary moments adding up to the Charmed Life I write about.

Case in point: A recent experience with a trans-attracted client who quit his practice. Not only did his quitting teach me something, it proves the power inherent in telling stories.

Paying the price of struggle

Many people think “stories create your reality” or “manifesting” depends on focusing on what we want. Focus on what you want, goes the general lesson, and what you want will manifest. And while that is true, usually what’s happening is we focus on something other than what we want. Then we get that. And then we say “this manifesting business doesn’t work”. It’s why so many don’t believe “stories create your reality” works. It’s working. But the reality people get runs counter to what they want. And that’s because they’re not focusing on what they want.

What happened with this client demonstrates this with supreme perfection. I wrote about his departure in a Positively Focused blog post last week. In that post I shared how he chose a life of struggle and hard work as though those things were badges of honor.

However, a life of hard work and sacrifice isn’t worthy of a badge of honor. Well, it is to other humans. Other people will look at your struggle and hard work and tell you you’re doing an honorable thing. This includes the transgender community. Look around you. If you’re a transgender woman, I wager that your friends support your dating struggle. That’s because they struggle too. So your struggle and their struggle appear “normal”, the price you must pay to get what you want.

BUT YOU NEEDN’T PAY THAT PRICE. In paying that price, you help others feel better about their struggle. Meanwhile you don’t get what you want. Or, if you do, you feel crappy about the process of getting there and likely settle for something less than what you want or give up completely. Your example will, again, help others doing the same feel better about what they’re doing. Which produces the same results you produce.

Living a life of ease

But you’re not here to help others feel better about what they’re doing. You and I and everyone else came here for the fun of life. Not struggle. Transgender and trans-attracted people especially, came to live lives of unique, beautiful, expressive examples of human evolution!

We transgender and trans-attracted people exist to live our lives as the gods we are. We’re here to create unique lives consistent with that which thrills us. And, frankly, I don’t know anyone thrilled about living lives of struggle, sacrifice and pain born of working hard. Nor am I aware of anyone thrilled with a life wherein they don’t get what they want.

Lives lived as the gods we are lead to fun, joy and freedom. The path of struggle, hard work and sacrifice CAN lead there. But often, it doesn’t. (My artwork)

But nearly everyone lives lives almost exclusively filled with that. And the reason people feel anxiety about their lives, or depression, is, at the core of what they are, they know a better path is available.

So few take that path because they get caught up in stories lived by others which lead them astray. Meanwhile, a life of ease, joy and fun awaits those who choose the other way.

We’re all free to choose

It bears repeating. The honorable life is one lived consistent with what and who we are as gods in human form. That’s why the masses and society in general idolize those who “walk to the beat of their own drum”, who are authentic pioneers creating something brand new or earth shattering. Rarely do such people follow society’s general life prescription.

Living that way, as powerful creators we all are, means casting off bogus stories so we live lives wherein everything we want happens effortlessly. Our life can include all manner of great things, including awesome love with that perfect match, where all our needs are met. Humans are the only beings on this planet mostly not living this way. Meanwhile, everything else in nature enjoys the joy I’m describing. I described this in my previous post on Positively Focused.

So many humans choose struggle instead. Then venerate struggle as somehow honorable. I show people how to live lives of joy. Not struggle. So my clients’ lives become the Charmed Life I write about. Not every client ultimately chooses that though. And I must be ok with their choice.

Which brings me back to the client who recently left the pratice. This client chose to follow society’s stories of struggle and sacrifice. Their choosing taught me something awesome.

The power of powerful stories

I saw tremendous potential in this client. He quickly grasped the fundamentals. As a result, our conversations often included profound insights and realizations about how great life is. We also reveled over experiences he created up to that point. Experiences proving undoubtedly that the practice works. Some such manifestations he created he originally thought impossible.

For example, he once believed no transgender women lived in his community. As he changed his stories, though, he came to see them often. It’s not that the women weren’t there. They were. But his stories blinded him to their presence. Once he changed his stories, they started showing up everywhere.

Another, more powerful transformation involved something he did in the past. That act brought him so much shame and self-loathing, he considered ending his life on several occasions. A simple process of changing his stories about that act totally transformed his perspective about the act. Over time, he gave up suicidal thoughts. Then he saw how that act offered excellent future opportunity to transform other people’s lives.

So this client produced quite a number of experiences proving to him “stories create your reality” works. I saw even more powerful realizations ahead of him, were he to continue the practice.

My Powerful stories…

Yet, I also saw in him a potential for “darkness”. By darkness I mean a tendency, a strong potential, that others’ bogus stories about life would sweep him up and carry him away from his emerging Charmed Life.

I likened him to Anakin Skywalker, father of the famous Star Wars Jedi, Luke Skywalker. Anakin became the Star Wars villain Darth Vader after giving into the Dark Side of the Force. Anakin’s mentor, Obi Wan Kenobi saw great potential in Anakin. But what Obi Wan and his fellow Jedi Masters also saw was potential for the Dark Side. In the same way, I saw great potential in my client. And a chance he wouldn’t fulfill that potential.

A wax sculpture at the Madame Tussauds Star Wars exhibit in London depicting Hayden Christensen as Anakin Skywalker from the prequel trilogy. The client who recently ended his membership reminded me of the power of this Star Wars character possessed. And a similar potential for succumbing to the Dark Side. (Photo By big-ashb)

Self-fulfilling prophesy

I often shared this perspective with that client. I hoped doing so would encourage his leaning into the light of his Charmed Life. In doing so I forgot how effective I am as a creator. I forgot I create my reality — including how others show up — through what I focus on. Not what I want.

The more sessions we enjoyed, the more encouraged I got about his potential. But the more potential I saw, the stronger my thoughts about him “turning” got. Since I identify strongly with Jedi stories, I recognize a lot of momentum exists in me about those stories. What I didn’t realize was how powerfully they’d create the client I ended up with.

Later in our session evolution, I sensed a “disturbance” in his way of being. He started coming to sessions less prepared. He started offering pespectives reflecting doubt and suspicion. And he started questioning my path. He became a version of Anakin Skywalker. Right before my eyes! He even turned to the hard-work encouraging book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People!

One day he strongly disputed the validity of the personal reality unfolding in my life. Of course, he knew his stories about my unfolding reality was irrelevant. And he knew such doubts would create realities for him that would eventually have him leave the practice. But that didn’t stop his momentum. A momentum amplified by my own focus.

Neither he nor I was surprised when he said he wanted to end his practice. He punctuated his departure with belligerent statements, feeling offended and again disparaging my path. Remarkably, these are similar behaviors Anakin showed toward his mentor Obi Wan. At one point Anakin even tried killing his mentor before becoming Darth Vader.

You get what you focus on

After that interaction, I realized I got what I focused on. I got a promising client who chose turning away.

Of course I did not want this outcome. But looking back on stories I focused on the most about this client, I must admit they mainly were about him turning away from the practice. So his choice is no surprise in retrospect. After all, I am a powerful creator. I create EVERYTHING in my reality. That includes versions of those with whom I interact. And that includes clients with whom I work.

I’m no exception to universal laws. Just like anyone else, I create what I focus on, not what I want. Focus is key. So if I want what I want, I must focus on that. In this case, I focused on something other than what I wanted.

And I got that.

I feel like Obi Wan Kenobi. Losing his promising apprentice, Anakin, rocked Obi Wan to the core. Unlike Obi Wan, however, I know everything always works out. So I’m not going into self-imposed exile like he did. I’m not going to quit my practice or quit helping others. The client who left will be fine. And I learned something awesome. It’s an experience I’ll remember, always.

I love how this outcome came out of what many would consider a not-so-good experience. Seeing the positive side of it and amplifying that story must mean the future will bring even more and better opportunities. Ones in which I enjoy clients who stick around. Clients who fulfill their potential as proud and powerful trans-attracted and transgender people.

This experience made me a better creator; a better spiritual teacher as well. And for that, instead of feeling sad or sucky, I’m deeply appreciative.

August 16, 2022June 19, 2022

A Powerful Transgender Woman Creates Her Best Man Yet

It’s so fun watching transgender women and trans-attracted people using stories to create their love lives. I love participating in that unfolding. When such people find their power, they realize they can create what they thought was impossible. Then their lives get really fun.

Of course, everything is possible. The only things keeping some things impossible are stories people tell. “That’s impossible” is a self-fulfilling prophesy.

Things change though when someone discovers they stand at the center of the Universe. There they realize they create everything around them. Including all the lovers they want…or the lack thereof.

Stories are powerful

A transgender client’s personal experience showed how powerful, or disempowering, stories can be. She started practicing with me 36 sessions ago. Last week, something happened that amazed her.

During those 36 weeks, Jennifer (not her real name) uncovered many disempowering stories. They included stories about dating, about men, about men’s intentions. But they also included stories about Jennifer herself. These included stories like the following:

I’m not good enough to get what I want
I’m too fat to get the guy I want
Men only want me for sex
I’m too old
Time’s running out for me to find a guy
I never can find the right guy I want

These stories together created Jennifer’s reality. What did that reality look like? One where men she met wanted her for sex, or for photos of her genitals. Several often called her, but only when drunk. They demanded sexually explicit texts, wouldn’t talk on the phone and when Jennifer pushed the issue, they would ghost her. Others made promises to meet in person, only to disappear later.

No wonder Jennifer created negative stories about dating, about men and about men’s intentions.

It’s not that her stories weren’t true. After all, she formed many of them from past experience. But if Jennifer wants what she wants, she can’t expect to get it while telling stories about what she doesn’t want, no matter how true they are.

Stories are powerful. They can create more of the same. Or they can create what you want.

Choose: get what you want or be right

Jennifer had a choice. She could tell true stories and be right. Or she could tell stories about what she wants and get that.

For example, one story she had about men was “I’ll never meet a nice guy locally”. Every guy she had met, she met through OKCupid. Desperation had her using online dating. No matter how many times I told her online dating works terribly, she kept using it.

That’s because she also believed it was the only way she met men. See how stories create reality? Her stories about not meeting local guys had her believing she could only meet men online. So that’s how she met them. And, the men she met there showed up consistent with her other stories. Especially stories about herself.

The online experience only amplified her frustration, which in turn reinforced her stories about men, her datability and her belief that she’d never meet the guy she wanted.

Again, Jennifer can’t tell stories about her past and get what she wants. Instead, she must tell stories about what she wants. That’s what we focused on in the ensuing 36 sessions.

A lot of transgender women would rather be right than get what they want, which is why they end up sad, bitter and alone. (Photo by Caleb Ekeroth)

Evidence starts proving it works

Over time, Jennifer’s new, empowering stories started creating realities consistent with themselves. It was rough going at first. Often Jennifer reinforced her old stories more than energizing new, more empowering ones.

However, there’s something cool about telling positive stories. Such stories enjoy enormous creative potential. You see, the Universe wants everyone to enjoy what they want, no exceptions. So when someone lines up with what they want by telling positive stories about it, they become a match to that. Then, that person gradually starts seeing evidence of what they want showing up everywhere.

That’s what happened with Jennifer. For example, men started waving at her as she walked down the street. Every time it happened, she said, she looked behind her to see if the guys were waving at someone else. Nope, they waved at her.

Or the male barista at the drive up kiosk would chat Jennifer up, where before he would ignore her. Another time a gas station attendant complimented her nails. And another time, a male restaurant sever paid particular attention to her as he attended the table she sat at with friends.

Ordinary people chalk these examples up to “coincidence” or some other logical explanation. But there’s no such thing as coincidence and logic has nothing to do with it! Everything happens on purpose. The purpose is reflecting back stories one tells about what’s happening.

The more Jennifer got this, the more such instances happened.

Evidence grows more insistent

Until one day while walking her dog at the local dog park, a man who also had his dog approached her. He said hi and Jennifer returned the greeting. They enjoyed a nice conversation while their dogs played. Afterward, the guy said “Oh, dude, I gotta go. I’m late.”

Now Jennifer interpreted that as the guy misgendering her. We don’t know what his intentions really were, but I told her telling such a story was not in her best interest.

“It’s better to make up a story that you feel better about,” I said.

“Like what?” She asked.

“Like ‘the guy was using “dude” like some people do. It’s just a figure of speech, like an exclamation”,” I replied.

At first, Jennifer didn’t like that new story. But after some cajoling she admitted it felt better than the knee-jerk story she wanted to tell.

I told her telling such stories would create the next evidence that would knock Jennifer’s socks off.

And that’s exactly what happened next.

Every transgender or trans-attracted person can enjoy a relationship that knocks their socks off. Unless their stories run contrary to having that enjoyment. (Photo by Jeremy Bishop)

It bowls you over

Jennifer had other stories not related to men and dating. These needed attention too. The combination of stories, what I call a Belief Constellation, creates everyone’s reality. Jennifer’s constellation included many negative stories about her work and her manager. Those stories kept Jennifer on edge, defensive and feeling like a victim.

Feeling on edge, defensive and victimhood makes one a match to situations that exacerbate feeling those ways. And not just work situations, dating situations too. That’s why we needed to soothe Jennifer’s work stories too.

That took a while, but the better Jennifer felt, the more she wanted to do the practice. In time, evidence at work convinced her more and more her new stories were working.

Her boss complimented her more and more. She gave Jennifer more responsibilities. When Jennifer announced she was looking for openings in other departments, her manager offered to reclassify her job so she could get more pay. Finally, her manager came out and told Jennifer how much she valued her and how much she wanted Jennifer to stay.

Evidence at work was bowling Jennifer over. It amazed her that simply telling positive stories could literally change her relationship with her boss!

Then one day Jennifer texted me from work telling me how a process I taught her – called PRE-PAVING – helped change her work experience. In the text, she misspells it as “preparing”:

Then it happened

Riding on that positive momentum created what happened next. Jennifer felt good about changes happening at work. So much so, she softened on the idea that she couldn’t meet men in person. She started acknowledging evidence showing she was meeting men. It’s just that she hadn’t soothed negative stories enough to have such men approach her in person.

That all changed rather suddenly.

A few days after a remarkably powerful session, Jennifer sent me a text. It was awesome:

Many layers prove how powerful this experience was for Jennifer. For one, she didn’t have to do ANYTHING to meet this LOCAL, GORGEOUS guy other than follow her intuition to take Rocco out for walk. Second, there’s NO WAY ON EARTH she could have deliberately sought out this guy. It could only happen this way, a perfect orchestration of her unfolding reality.

Third, the guy did all the work. He approached her and initiated a conversation. But most of all, what’s super awesome about this rendezvous, is through it, Jennifer realized yet another story she needs to clean up.

“He’s out of my league.”

However, even though that happened, she still had an experience totally contrary to EVERY experience she had in the past.

Every encounter a stepping stone

It’s really important at the point of receiving this experience that Jennifer enjoy the experience. Negatively judging herself does no good. Neither does harsh self-criticism about not doing something she thought she should have done. Everything worked perfectly here because this rendezvous wasn’t meant to be the perfect match or the perfect lover.

What it was, was an experience clarifying for Jennifer where she is on the path to becoming the perfect match to her perfect lover. How else will she know what disempowering stories remain in her constellation, if she doesn’t get to see her constellation in action? This experience worked perfectly.

It encouraged her. It created more desire in her. The fact that it happened gladdened her, inspiring her to the possibility that more such experiences can happen. It was a local connection! Something she thought impossible. And it showed that gorgeous men show interest in her.

So many disempowering stories got a dose of positivity just through this one experience. And so long as she remains in all these powerfully positive interpretations, Jennifer makes herself a match to more such experiences in the future.

Every client gets it

I love it when these kinds of things happen for my clients. Every client enjoys this kind of progression on their way to the love, the life, their greatest desires.

Everything is possible. Including having a relationship matching one’s wildest dreams. Nothing stands in the way of whatever anyone wants other than stories a person tells that are contrary to what’s wanted.

Clean those stories up though and watch how remarkable life gets.

Life is a wish-granting jewel. No matter what one wishes for, one can have it. One only need become a match to it, then draw that which is wished for to them as they hold themselves as a match to it.

I show clients how to do that. It’s easy, it’s fun and it works. Every time. You ready for your true love, your version of the wonderful life Jennifer’s creating? I can help.

July 26, 2022June 1, 2022

Happy Stories Way Better Than Any Therapy

A trans-attracted client echoed what many of my clients feel after learning how to tell positive stories about their lives and things they want, including relationships.

He’s been in the practice only four months. And over that time, his life transformed dramatically. No wonder he’s doubling down on telling happy stories about life, about transgender women and about his trans-attraction. He knows it’s the best way to get what he wants in love.

Furthermore, he knows the power inherent in positive stories. They literally make everything possible. Including turning around in just a couple weeks circumstances which had this client contemplating suicide. Suicidal thoughts are nothing serious. Eliminating them comes easy once someone understands then uses the power of positive stories.

That’s what this client did. In a couple weeks, he no longer even thought about killing himself. Now, he’s so clear “stories create reality”, he’s glad he made the choice of connecting with The Transamorous Network rather than going to a therapist:

He’s right on another thing. Mass shootings in the US wouldn’t happen if people understood why emotions exist and where they come from. In their ignorance of this, some get so far down emotionally, feeling powerless and insecure, the only thing they can think of is shooting up a school, church or sporting event.

Such events needn’t happen. But so long as people don’t understand what’s happening inside and around them, they will keep happening. So will the suffering. Same holds true for transgender people and their admirers and suffering they experience in love. So long as such people don’t understand emotions and the power of stories, suffering will continue in life.

Eckhart Tolle wasn’t playing when he talked about how unnecessary suffering is:

Is suffering still necessary for you?

I love how Transamorous Network clients get that suffering no longer need exist in their lives. I love then watching as they tune their lives so their lives match stories they tell about how they want their life, instead of how it is.

The more they do that, the more powerful they get. Then the more free they get. Before long life for them becomes the adventure it is. Then they get the love, the partner, the life they knew was possible.

We suffer because we know deep down that life was supposed to be fun. It was supposed to contain everything we want, flowing to us easily. But for so many, that’s not the life they live.

I want everyone living their happiest life. Therapy does work for some. But it has a terrible success rate. Telling positive stories works 100 percent of the time. Positive story telling is one of the best kept life secrets.

Although it’s not a secret. People have shared this life approach for…ever.

Isn’t it about time you got in on the fun life and find your match?

July 5, 2022May 25, 2022

A Happy Transgender Woman Gets Her Dream Career

A transgender client recently came to her session feeling ecstatic. I immediately became so too. That’s because I knew, even before she described what happened, what happened. She scored her dream career.

How? Solely by telling positive stories.

I know many will say this was a series of massive coincidences. But me and this client know what happened directly resulted from her learning to tell positive stories. As a result, she easily came into her dream job with absolutely no effort on her part. Instead she had fun, fun, fun.

“I told my mom,” she said. “Getting work this way is 1,000 times more satisfying than going through the grind everyone else is doing.”

Indeed. All during this time, her mom forwarded my client job openings from Indeed.com, hoping her daughter would apply. But my client wanted to prove to herself positive stories work better. I’m glad she wanted to test it, because the results were stunning. As they always are.

Here’s what happened.

Becoming a match to what’s wanted

Clare (not her real name) is on her 123rd session. It took her a while to start believing, but evidence she produced along the way roused dramatic behavioral changes. For one, she gave up online dating. She finally agreed it created more negative experiences than positive ones and those negative experiences too easily translated into negative stories about men. Those stories exacerbated her negative online experiences. That got her realizing trying to find a partner through online dating wasn’t worth it.

Then she gave up trying to “find” a guy altogether. Instead, she decided to focus on herself. She decided rather than meeting men who matched who she’s being now, she would become the “best version of herself” and, doing that, meet men who are a match to that.

It’s a standard result of the approach advocated here at The Transamorous Network. Every experience comes as a manifestation of what the experiencer emanates. That emanation happens through stories people tell about experiences had in the past, or experiences they want to have. The best way to meet the perfect partner involves first becoming a match to that. One does that by telling positive stories about a host of subjects. Those stories gradually change emanations one’s putting out about those subjects.

In time, one becomes a match to what they want, rather than being a match to what they don’t want. This process happens effortlessly. With enough practice, the process then happens automatically. Delight, surprise, life enjoyment and an ever-increasing desire for more of that mark “success” with the process. Oh, one also gets everything they want too!

The sucky job hunt

As Clare focused on herself, a lot of resistance she held for many subjects started giving way. In the wake of all that, she discovered more peace and satisfaction with the way her life currently was. For many years, Clare harbored impatience, frustration and annoyance about living with her parents on a farm in rural America.

But through the practice, she learned how to appreciate this situation. Indeed, living with her parents offered exactly what she wanted. The biggest thing was time. Her parents love her, provide for her. Even though they want her to get on with living – get a job, find a place to live on her own and make a life for herself – they also weren’t pressuring her to do those things.

I encouraged Clare see value in all that support. But Clare focused too much on what she thought her parents thought about her living there. As a result, Clare felt pressure, anxiety and impatience. Those emotions motivated her to look for a job.

But looking for a job sucks! It’s tedious, there’s a lot of rejection, and, depending on one’s self-image, it can be demoralizing. Especially when one sees how many jobs one doesn’t qualify for. In many ways, job hunting closely resembles online dating!

Clare wavered between frustration and annoyance, then disappointment and anger as she sent out resume after resume to crickets and rejection.

All the while I encouraged her to give up job hunting and learn to create the job she wants. How? By telling positive stories about what she wants, instead of trying to find a “job”.

Would you jump off a cliff?

I know everyone, or at least most people, look for jobs exactly the way Clare was. And, many of those people find work that way. But it sucks doing it that way! Yes, people find satisfaction working for good companies and for good people. The opposite also holds up. In other words, just because everyone does something a certain way, doesn’t make it the way.

Besides, spiritual beings don’t come into a body to copy experiences everyone else experiences. Especially transgender and trans-attracted people. Just by virtue of being trans and trans-attracted, such people came for a different way. They came to live their special, unique paradigm-busting life experience. One that would transform the world while offering immense personal satisfaction.

I explained all this to Clare, many, many times before she actually believed it enough to apply this approach to getting work. By this time Starbucks hired her as a barista, which was great because their insurance plan paid for surgeries she wanted. She liked the job, at first. She enjoyed who she worked with and customers she served. Beyond that, insurance and a paycheck though, it offered little satisfaction.

It took about six months before Clare was over Starbucks. She wanted work in her field. Something creative. Something more consistent with her aspirations.

Week after week, dissatisfaction increased. Finally, she decided to try telling better stories.

Getting stories straight

It took her a while to find pleasing stories. Subjects she told stories about that impacted “getting a job” were many and varied. They included stories about work, obviously, but also about many other things.

About work, Clare needed to sooth old stories about her not being good enough to have her dream job. She believed such jobs were scarce. You need to know someone in order to get such a job, she thought. She also thought a person needed to live in an urban center, where creatives lived. None of these stories are true. They aren’t false either. But such stories create a reality that excludes getting the job Clare wanted.

Other stories she needed to address were about living at home, about her parents and what they thought, about why she wanted work, about the timeframe in which she “should” start working and more. As I said above, stories about lots of subjects affect success in any outcome. Stories about what’s wanted, for example, contribute only partially to what one gets or doesn’t get. Often, stories hindering one’s ability to get what they want have more to do with stories the person has about themselves. Those stories hinder the vast majority of people.

So Clare had her work set out for her. The main thing I encouraged Clare do was enjoy her now. Have fun, I told her. Find things she liked doing and forget about finding a job. Enjoy the fact that her parents lovingly support her. Enjoy the fact that she doesn’t really need a job.

That’s what Clare started doing.

Getting stories straight means adjusting what I say about life so that my life reflects my adjusted stories back to me. The Universe works no other way. Harness this and the world becomes yours.

Getting bored doing nothing

In essence, I told Clare “stop doing and be more”. That’s a problem for many, many people because most of us think and believe things happen as a result of “doing”.

That’s never the case though, but it looks that way. But the way things look is an illusion. Things happen as a result of what a person thinks and believes and expects. Action is what happens at the last moment. Action or doing puts a person at coordinates in space and time where the desired manifestation happens.

But again, this is really, really difficult for people to get. Especially parents. They think doing nothing is doing nothing. It’s lazy, mooching, being irresponsible.

None of that is true. Doing nothing is doing something. When a person does nothing, they’re soothing negative story momentum. Stories that keep them in “doing mode”, the doing of which keeps them thinking their doing creates results.

Clare had a really hard time with this at first. She quickly got bored. Video games no longer held her interest. Movies got old. She got impatient, frustrated. We talked about these feelings and stories they sprang from and, in time, created new stories for Clare about those things. Those stories allowed Clare greater ease and satisfaction with things she once liked doing.

It took awhile, but Clare found more satisfaction and pleasure in pastimes once she let go of judgement about those things, judgement, representing stories she inherited from her parents and society in general. Especially conservative society which harshly condemns idle hands.

Then things get interesting

One day after weeks enjoying her life, Clare came to her session feeling inspired. She had cruised Instagram this week, something she really enjoys, and her feed served up an invitation to a panel presentation on something like “How to manage production sets in a time of COVID”.

Now’s a good time to include that Clare’s field of choice, where her creative passions point her, involves working on creative production sets. Photo shoots and movie sets are where Clare feels most inspired and engaged. So when this invitation showed up, she knew it was the result of the practice.

“I knew this wasn’t coincidence,” She told me in session. “So I wanted to share it with you. I’m really excited this happened.”

I was too. It was exactly the manifestation Clare wanted. Furthermore, I knew, I just knew, this was the beginning of a series of manifestations leading to Clare getting everything she wants.

We talked about the best way to attend the event. I encouraged her, if she was so inspired, to write down every panel participant’s name and what they say. Then later, followup with each of them with an inspiring message over Instagram. I suggested she highlight something each person said that resonated with her. That resonance, I told her, offered a clue that would unfold in a delightful way.

So notice this: Clare relaxed into her life. She learned to enjoy more and more her day-to-day. She learned to stop telling negative stories about everything about her life. Then, the universe served up the perfect invitation: the opportunity to participate in this discussion.

It was perfect. But more stood ready.

Life happens easy when one takes it easy.

Momentum ensues

The next session, Clare was super excited. She reached out to all the panelists. Nearly all of them replied. Three of them invited her to an in person conversation. Long story short, one of these conversations happened on a photo set in a small company owned and run by a lesbian couple.

Clare’s manifestation was unfolding…

Clare said she could tell she impressed them. She was high flying in relating how the conversation went. She added the other conversations thrilled her too, but this one was the most thrilling.

“Go with that feeling,” I told her. And she did.

She continued corresponding with those panel members who responded to her most actively. Then, one day, seemingly out of the blue, Clare got a voice message from someone she didn’t know.

The voice message told her a corporate gig was coming up and, if she was available, the voice said, they’d love to have her join the team running the shoot.

Clare just got an employment offer!

Manifestation…happens

That same day, she put the details together with the caller. By the time we had our session that afternoon, the opportunity was hers. It came together literally an hour before our session began.

Needless to say, Clare was over the moon. She told me her mother and father both expressed pride in her getting her first paid gig, in her field of choice, with lots of opportunities to leverage this experience into future gigs.

But Clare and I both know the only leverage she needs is the leverage inherent in her power as a deliberate creator, exercised through her powerful story telling.

“I told my mom,” she said. “Getting work this way is 1,000 times more satisfying than going through Indeed.com.”

Indeed. When a person creates opportunity, it’s always more satisfying than going hunting for one. It’s much more fun seeing what one wants come to you rather than you having to go out and find it.

Whether it’s work, income, a lover, better health or happiness, nothing lies out of the realm of the possible. Unless one’s stories say something is impossible, nothing is.

If you’re a transgender woman lonely and longing for love, or a trans-attracted person yearning for that special someone, or you want better work, more money or something else you think will make you happy, there’s no better Source for any of that than the stories you tell yourself.

You are the genie in the bottle standing ready to fulfill your every wish. If you’re ready to tell better stories about your life so that your life improves, and would like some help with that, I’m here.

A delightful post script:

I finished writing this post and the next week, had a session with Clare. She came to the session overflowing with excitement. That’s because after doing the gig described above, “out of the blue” three other people called her. They all offered additional gigs, at rates 21 percent higher than the first one! One of the newer gigs is a 4-5 day shoot, meaning Clare will receive over $1400 for 4 days work!

“This sure beats my Starbucks job!” She said. “I used to make maybe $50 a day there.”

Indeed. Once a person gets in the grove telling positive stories, the flood gates can open, revealing that the Universe, for sure, is pouring down everything one wants. Clare’s experience is a perfect example of that!