It’s Not Your Trans Circus, Nor Your Trans-Attracted Monkey

Photo by Park Troopers on Unsplash

The following comes from reader and subscriber Jaimie Harris. She responded to our post about what trans and trans-attracted love can look like. In that post we described how effortless finding love can be. We shared the experience of a transgender client who, by telling increasingly better stories, is finding her way through increasingly better trans-attracted guys.

What Jamie shares further illustrates how powerful stories are. They literally create our reality. And that’s exactly what happened with Jaimie. Her experience, like our client’s, illustrates everything we say here at The Transamorous Network.

Anyone can create anything they want. Whether a lover, a better job or a relationship. Whatever floats one’s boat can be one’s reality. But to have that, one must become a match to that ideal condition. That means thinking and believing in ways consistent with that which one wants.

It’s not easy at first. But that’s only because we’ve allowed ourselves to be trained out of that natural way of being. Every other living thing on this planet lives this way. Which is why you don’t see birds, for example, working hard. Or bears worried about the winter.

So here’s Jaimie’s response to our post. See if you can identify where she changed her old story to match what she wants. Then as a result ends up with exactly that.

Soothing one’s self to get what one wants

Thank you, your writing is on point. I was overwhelmingly lonely, after being on my own for several years. I have dated several men only to find out that they were still married, but they had no intimacy at home. Their problem, not mine. But I primarily prefer to be with ladies. I am pansexual. 

As I was seeking ladies out to date online, even though I live in a city of 8 million people, I still had been unable to find my true love. I know that in my chats I was showing myself to be insecure and too needy for a relationship. But I couldn’t help it because of my overwhelming loneliness.

Finally, I got to the point where I could back off a little bit and decided that if they wanted to stop chatting after a day or two, it was their problem not mine. And then I became less needy when I was online. Now I have a girlfriend who I am engaged to that I met online. Every day she and I are together is even better than the previous day. She is trans but has not started her transition yet. I look forward to making her transition easier than I was since I had no support at home. Each day we are together our love grows stronger. 

I’m sure that those ladies I was trying to date online were thinking I had issues that I still needed to resolve from having lived life as trans and being told I wasn’t worth anything to anybody and I was mental and perverted. I had seen two therapist, but neither one of them were familiar with LGBT issues, even though they advertised they were. 

But your writing has always helped me to keep grounded. Thank you.

Evidence surrounds us daily

We are literally surrounded by evidence proving our thoughts create our reality. Jaimie changed her beliefs. She released beliefs creating “loneliness” enough to attract someone she eventually fell in love with. She also released beliefs telling her she was broken. In doing so, she realized therapists she was seeing couldn’t help her.

Now empowered, she can support her loved one in ways she didn’t enjoy. She no longer believes that other people’s actions have something to do with her. It’s a great way to live: “Not my monkey, not my circus”. Let other people live how they want. Make nothing they do about you. Then watch as your life improves.

Many great things lie ahead of Jaimie if she continues releasing old, disempowering beliefs. The path to everything we want unfolds when we do that. Jaimie’s experience also shows that anyone can do this work. It all comes down to living authentically. And by that, I mean living the fully-positive, enthusiastic, empowered self that lies at the core of all of us. By living from there, life must reflect that back to us in the form of a life we love.

Most of us, transgender, trans-attracted or otherwise instead live lives “realistically”. We think we must be up to speed on current events. We must believe what others tell us. What they tell us about being trans, or trans-attracted, they assert is “true”.

I tell my clients nothing they want lies on that path. Become positively deranged, however, and witness the wonderful life that unfolds from that.

Jamie’s figuring it out. You can too. Need some help? If you need some help, I’m here.

Every Old Trans Sock Meets An Old Trans-Attracted Shoe

Photo by Tommaso Pecchioli on Unsplash

Trigger warning: This story is for trans-attracted men and therefore contains content that, while accurate, may be triggering for some transgender women. If you’re easily triggered by other people’s opinion, best that you go read something else.

Earlier this past month, I posted a popular story about why so many trans-attracted men are showing up these days. This is a companion story. While the other story offered hope to transgender women, this one offers hope to the men. This story encourages men not to settle, to instead hold fast to what they want.

That’s because the Universe will give you exactly what you want. But you must become a match to it. That means telling stories consistent with what you’re wanting. In time as your stories gain momentum, men, you will undoubtedly encounter your dream transgender partner.

There’s an old English saying: “Every old sock, meets an old shoe.” It means, eventually, every thing finds its match or mate. The same holds true for trans-attracted men. Hold out for what you want. Soothe stories you’re telling that contradict what you want. Then you will meet your match.

There’s a match for everyone

While telling stories about what you want, it’s critical that you not listen to other people’s stories. Especially if those stories contradict what you’re wanting. For example, if a transgender woman disparages your desire to be topped by a transgender woman, you don’t want to listen to that.

The Universe isn’t listening to that person relative to your desire. So why should you?

The Universe thrives on diversity. Especially diversity of expression. That means, for every desire, a condition fulfilling that desire exists. This includes mates. In other words, for every person who wants to be with someone, no matter the conditions they desire, mates will show up. That’s right. Mates PLURAL. But most men just want one girl. Unless you men hold yourselves as not a match to what you want, it’s guaranteed you’ll get it.

For example, there are many men who want to be with a transgender woman who finds joy in using her penis. And for every man with this desire, there are increasing numbers of transgender women showing up expressing pleasure in such acts. Indeed, many such women exist on Instagram already. And many are quite beautiful. Same with YouTube. Here’s one YouTuber. Here’s another.

If you are such a man desiring such a girl, it’s really important you tell stories consistent with your desires. What do those sorts of stories sound like? Like this one, offered by Julian, a transamorous reader of our content who also happens to enjoy “bottoming,” apparently:

A transamorous guy offers a killer positive story

Get what you want

Julian’s perspective, his story, is as refreshing as it is bold. It also will guarantee he meets a woman who will derive joy from having sex with him. Julian doesn’t give a rip what other transgender women, or anyone else, thinks about his interest. And, he knows when he meets his match, she will get as much pleasure as he does from his style of sexual expression.

That’s been my experience. Nearly every transgender woman I’ve dated has been a match to my desires. That tells me it doesn’t matter what statistics say, or what transgender women say about my desires. As you are the creator of your reality, statistics don’t matter and neither do others’ opinions.

Every old sock meets an old shoe! You will get what you want. You open the door to what you want the moment you focus on your desires and leave everyone else’s opinion out of the equation.

Need help finding your match? I can help.

The Best Life Is Available To All, Trans or Trans-attracted

Photo by Jamie Brown on Unsplash

Sometimes transgender women, and trans-attracted men, will say to me something totally contrary to how reality works. Then I tell them how reality works. When I do, such people come back with all kinds of reactions.

They call me arrogant. Or claim my assertions are “absurd”. They’ll say I’m blaming the victim. In other words, they’ll double down on their stories about how reality works. Even though the way reality works for them causes them great dissatisfaction. In other words, they blame reality for situations they find themselves in.

Not my clients though.

The thing is, my clients learn how to take control of their lives, so reality responds to their commands. Meanwhile those double-downing on reality being objectively real keep creating the same experiences over and over. Little do they know they are creating that world, a world telling them they don’t control it. So their stories show up as “true” for them.

A reader of my blog-double downing on his disempowering stories.

And it is the truth for them because their stories about reality create the reality that confirms their stories.

So in reality (LOL) they are controlling their reality. They’re just controlling it in a way that creates a perception that they’re not. And they do it over and over so it becomes “true”.

It can be different

Which is why I have my clients examine their belief constellations. For it is our constellations of stories or beliefs that create our reality. Not what we want. Changing what’s in the constellations changes realities we create. The more we tell stories about what we want, the more “what is” shapes to what we want. Tell stories about what we don’t want and we get reality containing that.

I don’t blame people who double down on their ignorance. There’s no blame to be spread. Everyone is empowered and the Universe stands ready to bend to everyone’s command. Being in command though requires thinking differently. That starts with examining how one already thinks.

Abraham echoing what my clients discover. The discovery sparks mystery and joyful revelations too. Who doesn’t want that?

This belief constellation analysis is easier said than done. Which explains the benefit of doing so with someone who knows how. Often our most dominant stories, those with the most creative power, run under our conscious radar. So it can be hard to see what’s going on in our minds.

But uncovering what’s happening in our minds opens whole new worlds of possibilities, mysteries and joyful discoveries. It literally makes every dream available. And that makes the effort worth putting in.

That’s why my clients feel so inspired and empowered. Once they see what they want showing up everywhere, inspiration takes over. After a while, they become more bold in their aspirations.

It’s waiting for us all

My own aspirations now lie far above what most believe possible. Yet, I already see evidence they are manifesting. Anything is possible. Only stories limit that.

And that’s why I really enjoy this practice. Practicing it with others amplifies my own joy. Some men say being with a transgender woman represents the “best of both worlds”. Well, I disagree. The the best of the best of worlds is realizing I am deliberate creator, creating the reality consistent with my most bold desires and helping others do the same.

The best of what life offers is ours. All we need do is believe it is. Then it becomes that. Then that becomes our life. The delicious Charmed Life I write about.

Ready for yours?

When Past Clients Keep Getting Great Results

I love it when a past transgender or trans-attracted client writes me to share results they’re still getting from telling positive stories. It’s a fringe benefit I enjoy: seeing the power of “stories create reality” in past clients.

People who understand and then implement that line get positive results that keep on coming.

That’s why I’m not surprised when clients write sharing their continuing wonder at how great their life keeps getting. When they share, their evidence amplifies my own. I get charge reading their ongoing results as much as I enjoy getting my own results.

When we tell only positive stories about our experience, we start seeing the world differently from most other people. One client for example, shared how, before her practice, her life mainly was composed of worry, dissatisfaction and boredom. She felt some contentment every now and then. But she knew nothing like what she discovered after she changed stories she told about life. She said nearly all her friends still consistently live the way she once did.

That confirms my experience. Most people just don’t know how great life is. But a joyful life can show up for anyone. All it takes: a willingness to deliberately focus. Today, this client is loving life. She’s finding herself consistently in wonder and amazement. For her, boredom, worry and dissatisfaction no longer show up. She’s gotten so much reward, she’s now an advanced practitioner and finding even greater levels of wonder.

The upward spiral is real y’all

On my other blog, I wrote about the positive feedback loop clients get from this practice. Life just gets better and better. By telling positive stories about life, life becomes a virtuous upward spiral. Gradually, subjects we care about improve. And the more they improve, the more they improve.

That’s because of the positive-feedback-loop nature of the practice. Meaning, continuing improvement births even more continuing improvement. And no limits exist to how improved life gets!

A Positively Focused practice (telling positive stories) creates an unending, increasingly joyful life.

So when a past trans client recently wrote me, I wasn’t surprised at how great his (he uses he/him pronouns) life keeps getting. Instead, I congratulated him. Consistently telling positive stories takes some doing. Especially if life isn’t going so well at first. After a while though, it’s just automatic. It’s automatic because that’s the way our Broader Perspective wants us living. And from there, all we desire becomes possible.

But a peculiar thing clients experience surprises them. It’s how they see how different other people experience life. Which is what this client shared:

It’s so great hearing from clients living joyful lives. I love that I’m a part of that change in their lives. It’s a fringe benefit I enjoy from helping others find their connection to the life many think impossible. Especially transgender and trans-attracted people.

The thing is, everything is possible. The only thing limiting life are stories we tell about life. Want to change your stories? Contact me.

When A Trans Woman Offers A Tired, Old Trope

Photo by Tengyart on Unsplash

We love it when transgender women write to us with vitriol. When they double down on their disempowering stories, we know they’re creating more of what’s making them miserable. Their words have nothing to do with us.

Such trans women offer perfect examples, corollaries supporting everything we say here at The Transamorous Network. This particular person responded to a very positive post we wrote about being transgender. I’m surprised it triggered her this way.

Let’s forget the fact her assumptions about me are totally wrong. Being a non-binary person of color would argue for a LACK of privilege, were I concerned about such things.

But since I’m not, I’d rather focus on the rest of her comments. For such comments say way more about Madonna than the thing she criticizes so vehemently.

You can’t have it both ways

When transgender women make such comments, they’re shooting themselves in the foot. Such a person struggles finding happiness and a life wherein everything they want happens effortlessly. To such people a default joy is literally impossible. Telling such stories creates that reality for them. Then they say what Madonna said above.

Again, telling negative stories only reinforces whatever experiences cause one to make such comments. What’s really happening though is, the person first creates the story. Then they experience circumstances confirming the stories. But they don’t know this is happening. They think experiences come first, then they conclude from that experience.

And that’s why they create realities in which they see everyone enjoying more privilege than them. Accept for those who share similar stories.

Strangely enough, everyone is over-privileged. All humans enjoy so much privilege, they can use that privilege to create anything. Including lives so oppressive they think they enjoy no privilege at all.

Stories create reality. There’s no way around that. But misery loves company. Which means, the more miserable a person is, the more misery they’ll experience. Then, when someone shows them a happy alternative, that person will double down on their misery instead. For them, their experience is true. Which it actually is. But it needn’t be.

Some are buying though

Despite this woman’s wrong assertion, transgender women are “buying” what we offer. As a result they find empowering careers, free themselves from suicidal thoughts and experience increasing success at love. Most importantly, they accept themselves more.

Same with trans-attracted men.

We don’t need every one of them buying. But for every one who does, that’s one more person realizing, owning and living a life wherein all they want, happens effortlessly. Who won’t feel perpetual joy experiencing that?

So we know what we offer works. Some aren’t going to get it though. Like Madonna here, they’ll keep on telling negative stories. I prefer playing with transgender women and trans-attracted men who want the perpetual joy we offer.

Want to join us? I can help.