men who love transwomen - The Transamorous Network

March 29, 2022February 3, 2022

Give Up Defending Victims Then Watch Life Get Great

Every once in a while a transgender person will write us in anger. They don’t like when we say “you create your reality”. They don’t like it because they think we’re blaming victims for “tragedies” they experience.

Here at The Transamorous Network, we know everyone creates their experience, including tragic ones. So we are saying people create their experiences. Only there are no victims. And when a person gets this for themselves, they realize something powerful: They can create any reality they want, including one where nothing ever bad happens to them.

That’s our point in saying “you create your reality”. Instead of wallowing in unwanted experiences, why not create a life where tragedies don’t exist, and instead, your life fills with joyful experiences?

Today’s post unpacks the “Victim Blaming” trope. It shows why victim hood doesn’t exist as an objective fact. Then it details why no one need experience tragedy. While unpacking all this, the post offers strong arguments why anyone thinking someone “blames victims” should rethink how they’re thinking.

It’s not that the blaming-the-victim trope isn’t true. It’s just that claiming a person does that, severely harms the claimant. That’s because the person making that claim disempowers themselves when they claim “victims” exist.

In other words, they make themselves a victim thereby setting up opportunities to experience victim hood.

Let’s first unpack the idea that tragedies exist.

Tragedies: do they happen?

When a person stands in the belief that “victims” exist, that belief validates the notion that “tragedies” exist. No doubt events happen wherein great suffering occurs. Often, such events happen with little or no warning. At least it seems that way.

Situations happen all the time that one group or another calls tragic. Even our political leaders use that word in describing events that, indeed, seem tragic. Building collapses, earthquakes and other natural disasters, airplane disasters, pandemics, mass shootings, terror attacks, rapes, violent murders…the list goes on and on.

Suffering from tragedies happen. But need they?

From one perspective these events are tragic in the sense that it seems none of the victims asked to have that experience. They (the victims) just had “bad luck”, standing at the wrong place at the wrong time. The tragedy claims them. Then their suffering spreads to their survivors – friends and families. Those who experienced similar situations and those who sympathize with the tragedy through media coverage, a reenactment film, or social media suffer empathetically as well.

It’s understandable then, when someone says “these people manifested that experience” the vast majority of people will respond angrily. They will accuse the speaker of “victim blaming”. Then claim that “creating your reality” is “unmitigated rubbish”. Which is how one person answered a question about Law of Attraction on Quora.

And yet it’s true

“Why would a person choose to be in a terror attack, die in a fiery plane crash, get raped or murdered!?” These people will cry. “That’s totally callus and impossible. It’s irresponsible to say such a thing! Not only does it disrespect the pain and anguish survivors go through, it perpetuates rape culture, misogyny and a host of other evils!”

While this post responds to such arguments in great detail, these words, while accurate, can only go so far. The best way these things get understood happens through practicing creating your reality in your daily life. Results you produce offer far more convincing proof than words on a screen.

So yes, it’s true. When a person experiences something like a tragedy, they chose that experience. We explain here in great detail. So bear with this very long post.

Things happen that appear tragic. But do they happen to everyone, or only those who invite them? (Photo by John Middelkoop on Unsplash)

What are you?

When a baby comes through the vagina, and for now, every baby comes in that way, humans think that being is innocent. They believe it arrived for the first time. It knows nothing about life on Earth. The infant needs nurturing, education and such.

And while the thing (the baby’s body) needs nurturing, the inhabitant knows the deal. It brings wisdom, not innocence, to earth. Whether freshly out of the vagina or 80 years old, a human being represents an emanation from a being possessing vast capabilities.

That being stands as vast as its capabilities. It is eternal, having existed as long as All That Is has been around (it has never not been around). In addition to being eternal, that being also enjoys indestructibility, invulnerability and it exists in all dimensions simultaneously.

You, dear reader, are this being.

Again, words on a computer will not convince you. To know…or credibly believe this…a person must put into practice a process that proves what you’re reading as accurate. Telling positive stories does this. Evidence positive stories produce will, over time, provide such enormously convincing proof, you’ll give up your human experience, revealing what and who you really are.

I have arrived!!! When that baby comes through the vagina, and for now, every baby comes in that way, humans think that being is innocent. But it’s not at all that. (Photo: Alex Hockett)

The Sacred Forgetting

Back to our baby…

When this eternal, indestructible being looks into the dimension that contains planet earth, they see great potential. We won’t go into detail about that potential. We’ll only say the potential is so great, it is literally irresistible.

However, to “come into” this experience and experience it fully, the being must “forget” its true nature. Also, the being, in all its beingness, is too great to “fit” into this dimension. So in addition to “forgetting”, it also must “squeeze” a portion of itself into this reality.

This all happens in the birthing process, shortly before or shortly thereafter, depending on the being’s choices. Some call it The Sacred Forgetting.

When the being sees this reality through the eyes of its creation “the body” (the infant), having forgotten temporarily its true nature, the reality of earth is COMPLETELY OVERWHELMING. This can’t be overstated. For some, it is totally frightening. But the infant is still a creator, no matter how small or innocent it might look.

That’s enough about the baby for now. Now, let’s look at the Universe.

The wish granting jewel

First of all, all physical reality is an emanation of the eternal, indestructible being experiencing it. It has no substance other than that. Therefore, it is 100 percent subjective as an experience. It has no objective reality separate from an observer. And no observer experiences what another does. This graphic helps illustrate this. It’s taken from the book Seth, Dreams and Projections of Consciousness, by Jane Roberts.

The ultimate reality of physical reality and its relationship to the eternal, indestructible force or entity that you are. Your reality overlaps those of another, but the other experiences only theirs. And you experience only yours.

Since it is so that no one experiences what another does, the being emanating determines the emanation. In other words, reality exists as a projected emanation of what goes on “inside” the projector. The being experiencing the emanation projects the emanation, then observes what it projects.

This is crucial for the unfolding of All That Is. Because the unfolding of All That Is is 100 percent dependent on All That Is. “All That Is” is the vast collection of the beings described above. All That Is literally is a stream (like a water shooting out of a hose) of intelligent, awareized energy. That “energy” is what “beings” are.

Since beings comprise All That Is, their collective emanations constitute reality across all dimensions. Why is this? And why is it crucial?

Everything plays a part

The reason reality is set up this way is because it facilitates “more and better”. More and better of what? More and better improvement, expansion, deeper unconditional love and appreciation. All those things are the purpose of the Universe. The Universe, therefore, exists in order to prompt or trigger these things.

So it is predisposed to these things because these things – love, improvement, expansion – are the basis of what intelligent, awareized energy is all about.

These beings could accomplish the purpose on their own. But it’s far more fun and immersive doing it across dimensional reality. And, since “improvement and expansion” are the name of the game, at some point way back in “time” these beings understood through their personal experience that “improvement and expansion” were more satisfying when they happened the way they do right now across space-time-realit[ies].

Now, we’re referring to the relationship between humans and the Universe. But the same dynamic exists between every instance of physical reality and the Universe. Not just humans. An ant enjoys a similar experience. So does a rock. Dirt too. Atoms too. The wind as well. These beings animate every instance of physical reality. Remember: you are one of them. That’s important.

So the Universe exists as a “process” whereby immensely powerful all-knowing beings use the “process” to expand into more and better. In doing so, everything becomes more and better. That evokes more and better, deeper feelings of love and appreciation, joy and empowerment among these beings.

Now let’s get back to that baby.

*Physical reality on earth is an emanation of consciousness, consciousness being the limited version of the being’s experience while in a physical body.*

Separation, illusion, insecurity

Human perceptions create the illusion of separation. It looks, though eyeballs and other senses, like physical reality is separate from the observer. That’s on purpose.

The human forgot what it is. So in human form, this god (what else would you call it?) perceives the world from a human perspective. From that perspective, for example, it looks like there are other “humans”, some of which care a great deal about this baby, some who don’t care at all. Some might even want to harm it.

But initially, the baby is surrounded by humans offering care. This situation – birth conditions, including parental type, economic circumstances, ethnicity, religion and more – are conditions all decided and agreed upon. Every being involved, including the baby, agreed it would unfold the way it does.

In other words, no randomness occurs when a baby comes through that vagina. All conditions are known and everyone involved agreed to them. The baby is a creator. It always was before, it still is now and will forever be.

Abraham telling it like it is from Ester Hick’s daily email.

Dependency begins

The problem, and this is where all problems start (if you want to call them that), is the forgetting. Not only has the baby forgotten, so has its parents, the doctor, the nurse, the uber driver, the children who are now the baby’s siblings. Even though they all agreed in advance, all of them forgot that’s what happened.

So now, the baby comes in (or out). Reality’s bewildering nature so starkly shocks, it causes insecurity in the baby. The baby realizes that, in it’s forgetting and now human perspective in a tiny body relative to others, it must fend for itself.

But it has allies. Its parents, the nurses and doctors, midwives or doulas, in those initial days, care for it. It realizes then that it must rely on these larger humans to give it what it needs.

That’s problematic in a way because it sets up and reinforces something that is not happening but looks like it is: that the baby is dependent on bigger humans, humans who are separate from the baby and could, at any time, withdraw their support or offer dangerous expressions such as anger…and “punishment”. So one of the first things babies learn is how to manipulate adults into caring for them.

Onto emotional adulthood

From that early moment on, the now human has concluded (not learned), or adopted from others’ conclusions, that the world is separate from it and filled with others, some of whom care, but most who don’t. The human also concludes that they must be careful.

They must be careful because at any moment, those who don’t care might come and do something that will harm them. Or those that do care will turn into those who don’t. That’s scary.

Even those with the best upbringing feel this way. We’re generalizing a bit for brevity’s sake. Generally, hardly anyone on the planet grows up free of the following emotions:

Insecurity
Anxiety
Worry
Doubt
Disappointment
Blame
Frustration
Annoyance
Boredom
Impatience
Jealousy/envy
Fear
Pessimism
Anger
Grief
Dispair
Depression

Occasionally, they’ll experience more positive emotions. But because humans generally exist in a state of insecurity, the emotions above represent their dominant life experience.

Now, we’re ready to talk about manifestation.

Where “reality” springs from

Without emotions, it would be very difficult to manage one’s manifestations. There are other factors, but emotions play a big role.

Remember, reality is an emanation that has no objective substance. It’s there to show the being what it has going on “inside” so it may steer to “more and better”. In doing that it gets more love, joy and appreciation.

So when an internal condition exists, that condition eventually gets reflected “out” into the emanation (reality). This is on purpose so the being, now in a human body, can tell what’s happening “inside”.

Because it is in a body, only a portion of its energies are in the emanation. “The emanation” includes the body. So its focus, in the beginning, is kinda fully engaged in negotiating through and around in the emanation, aka physical reality.

That’s why a human who doesn’t know what you’re reading believes the emanation is real. Beliefs associated with that belief tell the human that the way they get what they need happens through manipulating matter – people, circumstances and events. Doing that requires near full attention. And it’s exhausting.

Remember, reality is an emanation that has no objective substance. It’s there to show the being what it has going on “inside” so it may steer to “more and better”. In doing that it gets more love, joy and appreciation.

Linking thought and reality

Now, another word for the word “condition” used four paragraphs above is “vibration”. Everything is vibration. Science has proven this, but please, don’t ever let science be the final word. It knows very little.

Physical reality as an emanation is composed of vibrating frequencies or conditions operating in a harmonic. That harmonic allows human senses to translate the vibrating frequencies the way they do – into objects and space. But those frequencies have their basis in the same “place” from which beings emerge through a vagina into the world. So conditions or vibrations are constantly moving forward, changing and expanding within the being that now is partially in a human body.

Reality springs as an emanation from thoughts people think. These thoughts harmonize vibrationally with others, and increase in frequency until they create the reality each person sees. (Art by me)

How manifestation works

When that internal vibration or condition changes, the emanations must change, matching the internal change. Then the body’s senses translate those changed emanations into changed conditions, circumstances and events matching the internal frequency change.

That’s what happens when some tells stories. “Manifestation” occurs. And manifestations are ALWAYS occurring because people constantly tell stories.

Every human does this. Every human exists eternally. It squeezed itself into a body. Each human being agreed to all the circumstances making its experience “real”. And, each person cooperates with all the others in agreement.

So physical reality happens on purpose. It serves expansion, more and better, and deeper levels of unconditional love which is the basis of All That Is. All That Is, of course, springs from the collective stream of awareized energy, the “being” which all humans are. Which is what you and we are.

So “manifestation” is a fancy word for the process by which internal conditions (stories) get projected into external emanations which match those internal conditions through vibrational harmonics, which are under the direct control of awareized, eternal, indestructible beings choosing to incarnate in a physical body. The process is designed to facilitate greater levels of unconditional love, a kind of evolution for these beings, of which you are one.

A detailed explanation of how manifestation works. (My graphic)

Manifestation: It is law

Any time a person puts their attention on their physical reality, then formulates a story about what they’re putting their attention on that’s different from what they’re observing, they change the frequency of their internal vibration. When they do that, the emanation they’re looking at will change to match the story because the story represents a shift in vibration, vibration setting up conditions for the emanations. All other conditions being equal THIS MUST HAPPEN.

The same is true when a person simply changes their beliefs or changes their mind, or makes a statement inconsistent with observed reality. If they hold that vibrational harmonic long enough, their reality must change to match it and it will change to match it unless the emanator (the person) fails to hold the changed vibrational harmonic.

And this is why everyAnd this is why everyone who says manifesting is rubbish is right. Their story, their internal vibration says “[manifesting or Law of Attraction] doesn’t work”. What do you think their reality is going to show them? It will show them it doesn’t work.

By now you should logically arrive at the following: there are no tragedies. But we’re going to offer more to help you see the logic of that.

The Universe is predisposed to good. We already said that. Love, more and better all represent good. But there seems to be some “bad” going on. Why is that if the Universe is predisposed to good?

It’s because all that “bad” being created is on purpose and designed to lead people to the good.

Now think about that. Doesn’t that make the “bad” actually good?

Free will means a lot

It does. But people enjoy free will. Nothing can happen they don’t want to happen. They sit in the driver’s seat. They also forgot everything you’re reading. So they don’t know they create their reality and their reality is supposed to be filled with fun, good, happy love.

Go back and look at that list of emotions. Most people reside in the combination of these. Even those who say they don’t.

Emotions are early indicators of vibrational harmonics or stories. And emanations (reality) ALWAYS match the internal, incipient condition(s) as late stage indicators. Emotions tell you whether or not the emanation you’re about to experience is going to be good or not when it comes.

But when it’s not, that’s a good thing. That’s because external reality exists to help people understand whether they’re going in the direction of more and better, or not. And since every human enjoys free will, no one but the individual makes the choice.

So if I (as a human) am focused on stories that are predominantly negative, my reality will reflect that back to me. Not as a punishment or something bad, but as a clue telling me “look at and do something about your internal reality (my stories)”.

But I’m free to not do that. If I don’t, my reality will keep emanating what I’m putting out.

Tragedies emerge from free will

If I’m in insecurity or fear most of the time, or anxious, for example, the world around me will reflect that back to me. Not as punishment, but so I can know that my stories need attending. And if I don’t do that, if I keep focusing on conclusions that are negative, I will get more and more of that, in greater intensity, including more and more circumstances reflecting my internal state back to me, like a positive feedback loop.

It’s hard to believe, but a person who is raped had strong vibration happening inside, that created earlier warnings in him or her that, had they heeded them and changed their trajectory earlier, they would have avoided the rape altogether.

The same is true for people experiencing strong emanations such as terror strikes, disasters and mishaps.

Again, you must put the practice to work in your life to convince you of this. These words will not do it. But evidence you create will.

A person in tune with their “higher knowing”, we call that one’s Broader Perspective, enjoys a kind of GPS mapper. Their Broader Perspective routes them around such experiences to the degree the person tells positive stories. Better said: one’s Broader Perspective constantly guides people to everything they want. Since hardly anyone “wants” to experience tragedies, such things aren’t included.

Tragedies happen in the mind of observers and the lives of those who invite them in. That means you needn’t experience one. (Photo by Dasha Urvachova on Unsplash)

When things “go wrong”

We’ll offer another perspective on “tragedies” of which there aren’t any 😊. That is, when such things happen, great good always comes from them, but not always immediately. Hopefully you see this. One of the greatest tragedies, World War II, spurred some of the greatest advances in many, many fields, for example.

The point is, you can’t know, in your human form, why something happens to another. But it’s for certain what’s happening is on purpose and benefits the entity experiencing it. And, when that happens, the benefits spread to everyone else because everyone else is cooperating with everyone else as described above.

So nothing is ever going wrong, even though it may look like it. Conflicts, disagreements, protests, wars…it all represents eternal beings working out vibrational harmonics such that the end result is more and better, best described as an eternal, unconditional state of ever-becoming more…love.

The purpose of existence is simple: creating more love. (Photo by Fadi Xd on Unsplash)

Tragedy disempowers

No one ever need experience “tragedy”. Certainly such situations happen. But they need not be seen as “tragedies” as, surely, they are not. And, no one, absolutely no one, need experience something like that against their will. That doesn’t mean such situations don’t happen. When they do, people involved got there while not paying attention to what they created.

There always will be people struggling to gain their footing, and, in the process create emanations for themselves that look “tragic” to others.

The problem with concluding they are tragic is, when you do that, you tend to enflame your own sense of insecurity, which, if you hold long enough, will manifest into your own tragic versions.

Or, you can take the hint your emotions are sending you, shift your attention to something better-feeling and experience only increasingly positive experiences. That’s the nature of life’s promise to all beings. It also fulfills the basis of the practice my clients and I explore through The Transamorous Network.

March 22, 2022January 26, 2022

Settling In Relationships: The Great Pandemic Of Our Times

A Transamorous Network Client sent a text this week which offers a wonderful clarifying perspective. It shows distinctly why people settle in most areas of their lives, having given up on their dreams.

Some people push back when I say nearly everyone settles, especially when it comes to finding a partner. But when one understands how the Universe works, and why people act how they do while not knowing how the Universe works, one realizes why settling is indeed the greatest pandemic of our times.

And not just in relationships.

Why no one wants to settle but nearly everyone does

Wayne Dyer once wrote “you’ll see it when you believe it.”

That statement accurately reflects how the Universe works. A person who talks themselves into believing something, will, in time, discover that something to be “true”. No matter what it is, or how crazy others think it, a person who believes will see what they believe.

This is how the Universe works. It constantly reflects back to all of us what we believe. It does this so we can adjust our beliefs so they align with what we want, then receive what we want. No matter what that is.

Knowing this is power. For knowing this, one can create any reality one wants. All one needs is sufficient belief.

But the universal experience of “emergence” (commonly called “birth”) is, when a person comes through a vagina, the experience of physical reality, combined with their forgetting who and what they are, creates bewilderment. In that bewildered state, the eternal being, now human, flails a bit for stability. Usually, that means leaning on others who came before. Initially that’s usually parents.

Indoctrination begins

But after a while it also includes teachers, what one sees on TV and peers. It also includes the immediate environment and personal experiences. Having forgotten their eternal nature and origin, for humans, physical reality trumps internal reality. As surroundings take precedence, it appears that reality exists separate from the perceiver. That’s not ever the case. But that’s what it looks like.

So the perceiver begins to “believe what they see”, not realizing what’s really happening; that they are seeing what they believe. Much of what they see and what they learn from others, who are equally if not more out to lunch about what’s really happening than new arrivals, appears to be that the world is random, scary, limited and requires struggle and pain.

In that world, one must “get real”, stop living youthful fantasies, get a job and carry their own weight. This applies not only to earning a living, but to every other aspect of life. Including relationships.

So the result of all this flawed thinking is people give up on their dreams. Or they adopt mediocre goals from others, or parrot what others do. And since mostly everyone has “gotten real” and given up on their fantasies, it’s easy to see why people would settle for something less than their dreams.

No wonder so many live ordinary lives. And no wonder so many settle in relationships. That deftly explains the divorce rate as well.

The “dream” nearly everyone trades their authentic being and desires for. No one comes through a vagina explicitly wanting this. But nearly everyone compromises, then wonders how they got here.

My client’s experience proves the rule

“Alonzo” stood in exactly that place as he shared his thoughts this week. He texted a defense of his limited beliefs while not realizing that’s what he did. What he thought he did was explain “what’s true”.

But what’s true is whatever someone believes long enough. And usually, that means what someone adopted from others, from statistics, or observation, none of which has anything to do with getting what one wants.

Here’s what he texted.

My client “Alonzo” defending limitations inherent in his beliefs. Beliefs born from too much observation and not enough creation.

I know many, many trans-attracted men share similar ideas/beliefs because such men contact me regularly and say similar things.

But again, these things they say have no relevance to what they want. But they do create realities wherein what they want doesn’t exist. It’s no wonder then that they experience frustration and loneliness or, worse, hopelessness in finding their match.

Thinking such thoughts/telling such stories prevents such men from having what they want. What happens next is they settle, choosing to be with a cisgender woman, who can’t possibly (and shouldn’t) satisfy their desires. Then both the woman and the guy live a dissatisfying relationship until they separate in anger, frustration and resignation.

I’m not making this up. Two past clients lived that example. So I know many more have as well.

Some transgender women tell their version of these same stories. Which is why they live sad, lonely, frustrating lives. They’ll settle for a female partner, even though they prefer a male one. Or they go through dating “hell” online, where they kiss many, many frogs. Hell, all kinds of people tell such stories. Transgender women aren’t the only ones trying to solve their relationship dilemmas through online dating.

So let’s look at my client’s text, unpack these beliefs, then create new ones more consistent with what’s wanted. It’s not hard. And anyone can do it. Because everyone came into the world with this ability.

The way out of mediocre

Statistics offer a convenient analysis of a population. But every statistician will tell you that the closer to an individual member of that population, the less accurately that analysis will be. Statistics also don’t explain anything. They just describe a group of things or people based on measurable information.

Of course, we’re not using statistics when referring to how humans create reality. In this case, such things as stats become 100 percent irrelevant. Individual life experience is 100 percent subjective, meaning, no two people experience identical experiences. Nor do they ever conclude similarly.

What’s more, experiences an individual might have depend 100 percent on what they tell themselves. That’s the only thing – their beliefs – creating their experience.

So the problem with the belief that transgender women “…make up 0.6% of the population, and far fewer than that actually are physically attractive to me, are mentally stable, and like the type of sex that I do…” Isn’t that it’s untrue. It may be true.

But is that a truth that helps this guy or hinders him? Obvious it’s the latter. Because looking at this statement he can’t help but think something like “the odds of me meeting a girl I’ll like are infinitesimally small.” That thought will quickly cause feelings like hopelessness, discouragement, pessimism and despair. None of these will lead this guy to his match.

But there is a way out. If you’ve read this blog regularly, you know what it is. It starts with telling better stories.

*Finding your lover needn’t be frustrating. But it is when you’re telling stories that suck and you base your chances on the odds. (Photo by* *Adrian Swancar*)

Don’t listen to the odds

The problem with Alonzo’s first belief is, it limits in the extreme what’s available. Again, if he believes this tiny sliver of the population is the only sliver available, he can’t possibly feel anything other than hopelessness. Especially if he has no idea how to connect with that tiny group.

More important though is this. When a person believes this way, they limit in the extreme what the Universe can do for them. The Universe doesn’t give a rip about that statistic. It is a wish-granting jewel. Everything is possible through it.

But the creation process is controlled by the creator. Not the Universe. So if the creator doesn’t believe what he or she wants, he or she can’t enjoy what’s wanted.

Since Alonzo believes these stats as “true”, what the Universe delivers is what he believes. Again, the Universe can’t deliver something we don’t believe is possible, which is why Wayne Dyer makes his assertion that you will see it when you believe it. Alonzo doesn’t believe he can meet his match. So he doesn’t.

The power of Alonzo’s text, isn’t the statistics. It’s his belief in the statistics. That’s what creates the “truth” of the numbers. Not the “fact” that the numbers are true.

There’s a lot of universal truths in Star Wars. Including this one. Via GIPHY

No one needs a target rich environment

Nearly everyone believes they need a huge group of single people from which to sift through and find their match. But no one needs a large pool. Few people want to simultaneously have a relationship with more than 1-3 people. Most people want only one person. Do you really need a pool of people from which to get that one?

Well, you do need a target rich environment if you have crappy aim! That way your chances are better of hitting the target. But since everyone creates their reality by what they believe, or what stories they tell, each person can precisely and easily move through situations where they meet that one person who knocks their socks off.

But if that person believes their match is hard to find, then guess what? They’re hard to find.

My client says he’s leaving the door open. But is he really? No, he’s not! The door is barely cracked open if he thinks his match exists among only .6 percent of the population. Meanwhile Universe stands ready with more than 100 ways Alonzo can meet her. Alonzo can’t access any of them though believing as he does.

Instead, he could tell stories which cause hope, optimism and even positive expectation to pour out of him. Such stories will automatically make him feel enjoying his desire is possible, even easy. Here’s what some might sound like:

How I feel when I tell this story doesn’t feel good
But I must be here because I can’t be anywhere else right now
I haven’t always felt this way. I remember other times I felt better
That means I don’t have to be stuck here
I can change what I think and believe
Since I can change it, I can accept that I believe this right now
I like thinking that I can change my thoughts/stories
That I can change my stories feels better than feeling stuck
Since I can change my stories, I can accept the stories I currently have.

These stories are a start. The first step always involves getting to a place where one accepts where they are, instead of resisting where they are. Anyone unhappy with where they are is resisting where they are.

Taking the next step

The next step: create stories that dispel or dislodge stories that create not-so-good feelings and replace those icky feelings with better-feeling ones.

There may be few out there, but I only need one
I can tell better stories than those I’m telling
I would prefer better-feeling stories
Maybe it won’t be as hard as I think
Maybe there are transgender women in my town
I really don’t know because I really haven’t looked
That feels true
I like the truth of that. Really, I haven’t looked
I can accept that I haven’t tried looking
Accepting that feels better than accepting how hard I thought it was before
What if I don’t have to try looking?
I like thinking that I don’t have to try
Perhaps there’s hope for me
I like feeling hope
Hope sure feels better than powerlessness
Maybe she is out there
It’s nice feeling some hope

So in a few brief, deliberately chosen statements, a person can go from powerlessness, to relief, to acceptance, to incipient belief…maybe even hope. And from there, it’s all down hill (in a good way), so long as the person doesn’t reinvest in old beliefs.

Stories that prevent you from getting the love you want often sound “true”. But that doesn’t matter! What matters is, is the story you’re telling tune you to what you want? These sure do not! Unless you want to remain single and unhappy. (My artwork)

Get on the upward spiral

Getting out of the momentum of disempowering stories feels hard until a person tries. But feeling powerless, hopeless or pessimism can change in an instant, or at most, a few minutes. Look around you though.

Likely people who don’t know what you’re reading surround you. So they look at the world, draw conclusions about what they see, see realities they create consistent with that, then say “yep, see, I’m right. The world is this way.”

Just like Alonzo.

The minute they tell themselves they’re right, they lock in that conclusion as a belief. Then the world ends up that way. A trans woman only meets chaser men. Men can’t find transgender women who aren’t whackos or prostitutes.

For example, Alonzo told me in our subsequent session that he “hasn’t seen a single trans woman in my area.”

“Of course not,” I said. “You can’t when you have such strong beliefs in the way creating a reality consistent with ‘there are none in my area’.”

It can be challenging convincing someone creating a reality they don’t want, that the reality they do want is as easy to create as that reality they have, the reality they don’t want.

But once someone learns how the they, their Broader Perspective and the Universe work together to create reality, I find these people start on a positive upward spiral leading to everything they want.

All my clients eventually enjoy the upward spiral of positive stories. The better stories they tell, the better they feel, then the better life gets. Then they want more of that, so they tell even more positive stories and life gets even better. (My artwork)

Get what you want

They can’t not get what they want because their Broader Perspective and the Universe want them to have it. The only reason they don’t have it is because they’re in the driver’s seat. This Universe and their Broader Perspective can’t give them what they want when they aren’t focused on that. The Universe and their Broader Perspective only gives the person what they attend to. Which is why beliefs are so important.

Beliefs are how humans attend to what they want. The problem is, most humans use their beliefs to attend to what they don’t want. Which is why so many don’t get what they want. Or they get a smattering of what they want, among a crap ton of things they don’t want.

Getting what’s wanted is supposed to be what’s happening here on Earth. The heaven everyone thinks comes after death is right here on Earth. But each person must create it for themselves. No one does it for them. Not even the Universe or one’s Broader Perspective.

Joy in life comes from figuring out how to do that then doing it deliberately. And the more one does it deliberately, the more joyful they become. Then their world must reflect back to them that joy, because that joy comes from joyful thoughts and thoughts create reality.

It’s not hard to do any of this. Everyone is doing it right now, today. They’re just doing it in the wrong direction which leads them to a life of settling.

I say, do it deliberately and show yourself how easy it is. I can help with that.

February 8, 2022December 31, 2021

A New Client Raves Over His Great Results

Some transgender people – it’s never trans-attracted men – get triggered by how I support the transgender community. They don’t realize their getting triggered has nothing to do with me or what I do. It’s all about their insecurity, triggered by stories they’re telling.

I often respond by telling such people my clients and the community in general benefit hugely from what I offer, evidenced by many people offering thanks, appreciation and examples of how it helps them. Nearly all my clients stick with me because what they get in transformed lives far exceeds how much it costs.

This is why I guarantee the results I promise.

My most recent client offers a great example. He’s a trans-attracted man. After his very first session, he created for himself exactly what I offer and guarantee everyone gets, trans or trans-attracted. Here’s what he texted me:

My newest client gets an extraordinary life experience after only one session.

Everyone gets similar results, although details look different. That’s only because all physical reality is 100 percent subjective. It’s unique to the perceiver. No one shares their experience with another. Which is why so much disagreement happens. Everyone thinks other people are having the same experience they are.

There’s no reason for a transgender person – man or woman – to go through life not getting what they want. Same for trans-attracted people. The only thing keeping such people from what they want is the person themselves.

The trans experience and the trans-attraction experience are human experiences. Both are wholesome and good. I show folks how to get to that wholesome goodness story-wise. Then, in time, their world must reflect that back to them. Including bringing them everything they want.

I don’t care when some transgender women hate on me after reading a Transamorous Network post. They literally don’t know what they’re talking about.

But trolls gonna hate

Sometimes a transgender woman will read me saying transgender women own the lives they create, then tell me I’m victim blaming. But they don’t understand what my clients do. There are no victims.

But if a person believes there are…they make themselves a victim as much as those they pity as victims.

I don’t care when some transgender women hate on me after reading a Transamorous Network post. They literally don’t know what they’re talking about.

But my clients do. That’s why they rave about results, while sticking around. They get a taste of their power. Then they want more.

I know what I offer helps transgender people and those who love them. I know because such people tell me so. That’s why I do what I do. I came here for this.

So when a client raves about results they produce, I focus on that. Those who get negatively triggered, who’ve never even tried to understand what I offer, let alone put it into practice, get the cold shoulder.

I tell them to take their triggered attitudes elsewhere. Find things to read they agree with. Leave me alone.

That way I have more time to serve those ready to live their lives as the creators they came to be.

February 1, 2022December 27, 2021

Transphobias: Better Left In The Great White North

If you’re transgender or trans-attracted, it’s better to think about all the great things about being trans and the great things about being trans-attracted, than thinking about other people’s transphobic opinions about who or what you are. At The Transamorous Network we encourage becoming oblivious to why people say and do things.

Unless you can tell positive stories about them.

That’s why we ignore when a trans woman thinks she knows better about where we’re coming from than we do, and criticizes or demeans what we share. What others think is none of our business 🤣.

A recent client experience shows why doing what we do acts in your best interest.

Coming to grips with her likes

She visited a local drive up coffee kiosk for a java infusion. It’s something she loves doing. Icing on that coffee cake is the beefcake who works there. My client crushes on him every time she sees his hunkiness.

He’s not her only crush. She talks with several men at a time. Her fortune meeting men shows her she’s getting everything she wants. It’s a case in point for trans women: tell the right stories and everything you want – including men – appear.

I think she’s having a great time with all the guy she’s talking with. The most recent guy she spoke with, however, told her dating transgender women scares him. Hearing this, my client expressed feeling two ways about it.

In the first way, she wants to console the guy and his insecurity. But in the second way, she wants nothing to do with it.

Give the finger to other’s opinion. They don’t matter, so you shouldn’t mind.

“I don’t want to have to help a guy come to grips with what he likes,” she said.

Match what you want

That’s when I explained how what he said reflected back to her what she’s thinking about the same topic.

“Huh?” she asked.

“The reason you’re meeting guys who are afraid of dating you is because you still aren’t sure you’re datable,” I told her. “That’s what the Universe is showing you by matching you with this guy. Your dates always match your stories.”

My client has enough of The Transamorous Network’s approach under her belt to get the truth of those words. Every trans woman meets people who match what she’s putting out. If she doesn’t like who she’s meeting, complaining about who’s she’s meeting is the worst thing she can do.

Instead, we recommend becoming a match to the kinds of men you want to date. How? Tell stories about everything that match what you want. Everything. That includes those guys you meet you’d rather not meet.

Doing so requires serious, honest assessment of stories you tell. Especially stories about men…and stories about yourself. Some trans women think they’ve got their thoughts in the right place. Usually, that’s not the case. It’s easy thinking you’re clear, when, really, you’re not. Like this client explains:

A trans woman acknowledges something nearly all trans women (and everyone else) won’t: she really didn’t understand what was going on in her head, until she got a real good look.

Same goes for you trans-attracted men. Figure out your stories, change them and the trans girl you want is yours.

Let’s return to my client’s story.

Back to the coffee kiosk

The hunky dude walking up and down line of cars had what my client interpreted as a “transphobic reaction” to her. She said when he saw her, he looked at her “strange” and kept looking back at her while taking others’ orders.

We talked about this from the perspective of “other people’s opinions aren’t my business“, and why that is. Most people move through the world from places of insecurity, fear, pessimism and negativity. Why on earth would my client want a piece of that????

Instead I asked my client if she could think of alternative stories which would make the hunk’s reaction less personal, or even personally favorable.

It took her a while. But after a little cajoling, she came to some good ones:

His behavior has nothing to do with me
He’s never seen a trans woman before and is curious, not negative
Maybe he’s trans-attracted and didn’t know it until now!
Maybe he finds me attractive!

It doesn’t matter whether these stories are true or not. How they made my client feel meant everything.

Why?

Because how she feels tells her something important. So these stories were very good for her. I knew this because her countenance totally changed after telling them. That meant she was headed in a totally different direction than before.

Stories create the world. And everyone’s telling stories all the time, including you. So why not create the best worlds? How? Tell the best feeling stories.

Leave them in the cold

How this guy reacted to seeing my client had nothing to do with her and everything to do about him. But in that moment, my client observed that reaction on purpose. Even though she didn’t realize it at the time, her current beliefs showed themselves in this guy’s behavior. That was a good thing, even if she didn’t believe it at the time.

Seeing what she saw was great evidence of The Transamorous Network’s approach working. Now she knows what her stories contain. That allowed her to do something about them: create better-feeling stories.

So what started as a negative situation turned out to be a really positive one. This is why nothing ever goes wrong in the world. Everything always goes right.

Leave other people’s opinion’s alone. Especially ones inconsistent with yours. They don’t matter. The only place they belong is where they belong…in the Great White North. In other words, out in the cold. Not in your awareness.

Keep them out there and watch how much your love life improves.

January 25, 2022December 4, 2021

Finding Love Results From Seeing The Proof

This morning during a client session, the client shared a perfect example of how easily The Transamorous Network’s process works for getting the relationship one wants.

The process IS easy. But like my client, many trans women, and trans-attracted men, make it harder than it needs to be. They make it less fun too.

All one need do to get anything they want is tell stories about their desire and feel good about having it. Even if they don’t tell positive stories, evidence still surrounds them, telling them they’re getting what they want.

But because the person won’t acknowledge the evidence, getting what they want takes a VERY long time…or it doesn’t happen at all.

I should correct that. Every desire fulfills itself. But many people, especially trans women, compromise on what they want. They’re too impatient, tell too many contrary stories and focus on the wrong evidence. But even those girls get what they want…as everyone does…after death. For when a person dies, they return to nonphysical where everything happens in an instant.

No one need wait until death though to get what they want. I know this based on my own experience. That’s why I’m committed to serve members of the trans community ready to hear what I share. Those women (and men) are emmissaries of what’s possible.

This trans woman is an example:

But I digress…

It’s basic math

My client, let’s call her Josie, lamented during one session two weeks ago. She complained about men she was meeting and how those men expressed beliefs contrary to what she wanted. We talked a bit more before I turned the subject to something she enjoyed talking about.

After a little time there, Josie admitted feeling better. Then she doubled down on her previous feeling.

“I feel that I take two steps forward,” she said. “Then take one step back.”

What she was saying is she feels pessimistic because she sees herself going backwards. But if you look at what she actually said here, she was sharing evidence of progress. Not going backwards.

Think about it. It’s basic math.

Let’s say a person is walking forward from point A, and they take two steps forward. How far away are they from point A? Right, two steps.

Now let’s say they take one step back. How far are they away from point A? One step. That’s progress!

This is a common perception problem many humans (not just trans ones) suffer from. Josie acknowledged it in our session today.

“I have ingrained ways of looking at things that have me see negatively,” she said.

“I agree,” I said. “Meanwhile evidence surrounds you that you’re progressing.”

He’s looking for you. Are you seeing evidence that you two are getting closer to meeting? (Photo by Tamarcus Brown on Unsplash)

The evidence…

Then I reminded her about our session last week. Back then, after bemoaning progress that looks like two steps forward and one back, she happily described an encounter she had with a guy.

As she describes herself, she regularly smiles at women she doesn’t know, but never smiles or even makes eye contact with men. But last week she caught herself smiling at a guy.

That shocked and surprised her, but she also saw it (in the moment) as evidence of her progress. It so happened that in this same conversation she also talked about the “several men” she was talking to on dating sites.

So here she is producing all this evidence of guys showing her interest. And yet, she’s complaining about her lack of progress!

Then, this week, she shares even more evidence. Turns out that while walking her dog at the local dog park, she not only smiled at a guy, she struck up a whole conversation with him! As she did so, she was so clear what she was doing, she said she wanted to text me about her “progress” as she called it.

It’s easy, if you let it be

I told Josie then that she has the option at any time to turn her attention to evidence indicating progress towards what she wants. Instead, what she’s doing is indeliberately focusing on “lack of evidence”. That makes her feel shitty. Feeling shitty, Josie can’t see her progress. But the progress is there.

Focus on that progress and telling positive stories becomes easy. Then life gets easy. Then everything one wants comes easily. Including that love life where the perfect partner shows up.

But you must let it become easy. Most people fight against “easy” by being indeliberate about stories they tell. They focus on their pessimism, even when life is showing them all the evidence telling them they are getting what they want.

At The Transamorous Network I help trans women and trans-attracted men all day long learn how to turn their lives into lives where everything they want happens. It’s easy once you get the hang of it. And it’s fun.

Josie is beginning to get this. When are you going to?