Tag: transamorous

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What the best relationship looks and feels like

Photo by Lesly Juarez on Unsplash

TL;DR: The author argues for trans and trans-attracted people being selfish as the way to create a happy life for themselves. They share a client’s experience in creating happiness to illustrate and support his argument.

Trans women and trans-attracted men: Let’s talk about relationships. There’s a lot to talk about here. Mainly because most of us feel relationships are one of the most, if not the most, important things. After all, we are told, we need relationships to be happy. Everything we do, need and want, it seems, comes through relationships. It is relationships with others that create community. It’s relationships through which we – supposedly – find love. Such relationships also create safety, belonging and a whole lot more.

And, if we’re honest with ourselves, relationships also offer the worst in humanity. Relationships with others are the framework through which some of humanity’s worst traits surface. Greed, conflict, psychopathy and violence all would be meaningless were it not for relationships.

So relationships aren’t all rainbows and butterflies, as the saying goes. We all know this. Just ask Israelis and the Palestinians…relationships can suck. And yet, a lot about what we seem to be – human – seems to compel us toward relationships. Especially relationships with other humans.

There’s a far more satisfying, powerful relationship, however, one through which everything we want comes. It’s so all-encompassing, we literally can’t survive without it. And when we prioritize that relationship above all else, we can live our wildest dreams.

That relationship is what I’m writing about today.

Let’s dive in.

Over all else

The relationship I’m referring to has nothing to do with a god, especially the Christian god or Jesus. But this relationship does tap into the power Christians ascribe to their god.

The trouble with this relationship, however, is it’s as plain as the nose on our faces, and yet, we invariably prioritize other relationships ahead of it. And that out-of-whack prioritization creates all the troubles we have in other relationships. That’s because that which we could enjoy a relationship with wants our undivided attention. When we give it that attention, undivided, everything else in life flows easily.

What relationship could I possibly be referring to?

The relationship with ourselves.

That’s right, there’s no better, more satisfying, more powerful relationship than the relationship with ourselves. The reason why is because everything we see “out there” in the world springs from this relationship. So when we get this relationship where it should be – as our number one priority – then everything “out there” falls in line.

It doesn’t happen in an instant. That would be magic and magic isn’t a thing. But when a person prioritizes themselves over all else, then gradually, all else reflects the improvement inherent with prioritizing a relationship with themselves over all else!

Selfishness: a virtue

That seems like circular logic, but, as I’ve written before, the Universe and All That Is functions on circular logic. All That Is exists to joyfully know itself. The paradox of that is, the more it seeks to know itself, the more of itself it creates. This process makes All That Is – and you and me – eternal. So the more All That Is seeks to know itself, it creates more of itself to know. That’s the glorious circular process often described in ancient teachings.

Now, some might argue that prioritizing one’s self over others leads to selfishness. I completely agree. But I know selfishness is not bad. In fact, it’s the best way to be. Because when one lives that way, they discover everything else, including other people, are able to take care of themselves, leaving the person free to be, enjoy and lavish their life.

Indeed, when we put ourselves first in all things, our life also improves. We stop trying to change things over which we have no control. Letting go of such tasks feels better and better. And when we feel better, the world around us reflects that better mood back to us. It reflects it in ever-improving life experiences.

So, really, we have control of all of our experience. How? Because experience reflects back to us our inner state. And when we prioritize our inner state – our relationship with ourselves – then our life experiences reflect that improved inner state.

We also feel love and other higher emotions more. That’s because when we seek to know ourselves, which is aligned with what the Universe always does, we can’t help but feel the eternal joy that is Universal consciousness.

Put it to the test

That previous section may sound like a bunch of “New Age” hooey. Especially to cynical, jaded trans women. But it’s 100 percent accurate. I can write forever about how powerful what you’re reading is. But nothing compares to evidence produced by your lived experience.

So if you’re having trouble believing this stuff, I suggest you prove to yourself how accurate it is.

So how do we prioritize the relationship with ourselves? It doesn’t seem easy when the entire outside world encourages prioritizing others over ourselves. So it takes practice. It helps to know that a “self” exists in us worthy of our undivided attention. That “self” is the “god in human form” I write about in my other blog. Discovering its existence is easy.

The best way to do that is by testing Positively Focused premises, which are summed up in the phrase “you create your reality through the stories you tell”. As a person tests these premises, they create, or manifest, experiences – people and things – that come in surprising, seemingly coincidental ways.

And when so many of such manifestations happen over and over, the person must acknowledge something other than “coincidence” is at work. That acknowledgement is just like acknowledging there is a self worthy of having a relationship with. Paradoxically, the person testing these premises, once they start seeing things happen, will want more things to happen. As more happens, they also get more bold: they want bigger things to happen.

As their desires grow in scale or magnitude, their trust grows. Their trust in themselves and in this self they are building a relationship with.

Betrayal births bitterness

Growing that relationship brings a necessary letting go of beliefs keeping us all prioritizing others over ourselves. As we let go of them, we might have to face hard-seeming choices. Often it means disregarding what others think of us. Sometimes that looks like cutting off certain people, including family members.

For example, a client recently faced having to cut off her daughter. Her daughter, the epitome of a hellion, raked the client over all kinds of emotional coals throughout their 20-year relationship. Yet, the client believed she had to be there for her daughter, despite the poor treatment, because that’s “what parents should do”.

Little did she know she created the belief “that’s what parents should do” after her parents did something the client considered unconscionable.

Throughout her youth, her parents promised her they’d save for and pay for her college. But when the client was 16, the parents reneged on their promise. Because of this the client felt her parents betrayed her. She bitterly resented their decision and that bitterness festered in her.

An angel disguised as a devil

The betrayal was personal for her. So, when she had a child out of wedlock, something she didn’t want in the first place, the client swore to “make things right” by not doing to her daughter what her parents did to her.

The problem with all of that is the Universe has an amusing way of showing us all how our bogus beliefs aren’t in our best interest. It will give us experiences reflecting our bogus beliefs right back at us. If you think all men interested in trans women are chasers, you’ll only meet that kind of guy, for example. If you believe all trans women are not passable or psycho, you’ll get that. In the client’s case, the Universe gave her a hellion daughter. And boy, did this young person torture her!

Their relationship was making the client miserable. Little did she realize, this daughter was an angel the client sent herself. The angel’s mission: to teach the client she has everything she needs within her, to stop blaming her parents, and to put herself first.

After weeks of learning to prioritize herself through what I offer, the client, after one particularly harrowing conversation with her daughter, decided to do just that. She cut her daughter off and the relief she felt was immediate. With each passing day, her relief grew.

Doubling down

Thirty days in, she was feeling great. But then, her old created reality, born of her belief “that’s what parents should do” reasserted itself. Her daughter reached out and kept reaching out. She wanted to “fix” their relationship. The client couldn’t resist. She felt pulled, by her belief, to reconnect. Which is what she did.

This kind of thing typically happens. A client will have an epiphany making their life much better. But then, old belief momentum draws them back into their old way of being, the being they left behind. Usually, when that happens, it shows the client why they would have been better off not letting that happen.

But there’s no way clients can get it wrong. For these kinds of “set backs” actually amplify their commitment to put themselves first. Which is exactly what happened with this client.

The reconnection was horrible. Nothing got “fixed”. And it reminded the client what had been absent for 30 days. It also put those past 30 days of relief, peace and ease in proper perspective. She wanted more of that. So she doubled down on cutting her daughter off.

The way to relief

Two weeks after her recommitment her husband said something remarkable over dinner.

“You seem really happy,” he told her. The client agreed, she did feel happy, happier than she had in decades. The husband credited that return to happiness to his wife cutting her daughter off. But the client knew it was primarily because she was putting herself first and that caused her to make a choice she otherwise would not have been able to do.

A week later, her husband once again noticed.

“It’s so good seeing you so happy,” he said. The client agreed. She said she was returning to the self she knew before her daughter “happened”.

Now, it’s not that the client doesn’t love her daughter. She loves her and wants the best for her. But she realizes that, to be happy, she must put herself first. And when she does that, she thrives. And as she thrives, eventually, her daughter will too. That must happen because the client’s experience and everything in it, including her daughter, reflects back to her, her inner state. Before, her daughter reflected the client’s inner turmoil. Turmoil born of expecting her parents to have put her first, when, obviously, they could not have.

Their decision not to pay for their child’s college was the right thing: they had to put themselves first. The client was making them wrong for doing what they knew was right. And so, the Universe, through her daughter, was showing the client the way to relief.

Putting ourselves first is the best way to personal happiness. (Photo by Lesly Juarez on Unsplash)

It’s all choice

And that’s the thing about realizing what comes from putting ourselves first. We realize no one is responsible for our happiness but us. And, no one can make us happy but us. Any other happiness source is fleeting, capricious and fickle. As such, such happiness sources are not in our best interest to put before the one relationship that really matters.

Meanwhile, as I mentioned before, everything in our experience improves when we do this. And so, the client’s daughter’s life must also improve, as she learns what her mother did: That she must put herself first and stop relying on her mother for her happiness…or anything else, including tuition, food and rent.

Relationships are not about people coming together, planning together, working out problems, coming up with solutions together, compromising, and investing in and extracting from each other what they need, all while claiming to love one another. Rather, each person is 100 percent responsible as a creator for creating the best version of their life.

When they do that, the whole world improves, but only for that person. In the meantime, those choosing a different life way fade out of that person’s experience. Then those reflecting the person’s new choice show up as reflections of that choice made.

This explains why so much variety in life experience exists. People are choosing, either deliberately or not, then the world reflects back to them the nature of that choice.

It’s all about unconditional love

This means, first cultivating a strong relationship with one’s self is paramount. When that happens, life reflects back to the person only the best things in life, because that’s just what happens when one puts themselves first.

Then, and only then, can a person create better versions of life AND better versions of people in their lives. They create versions of people by coming into the presence of another with their relationship with themselves so secure, that that other person has no choice but to reflect back to the creator a version of them matching what’s going on in the creator.

And when the creator achieves that, sees the person exhibiting the version of themselves the creator envisioned, and then revels in that, the manifestation of evidence of their creation, then that person being created feels that reveling as unconditional love for them. And that changes that person irreparably.

That’s why selfishness is so important. It can literally change human relationships. It does that through love, which is what ourselves have in abundance for us.

And that’s how we can influence others in the best way. “Influence” happens whether we know we’re doing it or not. Unfortunately, for most of us, we’re using that influence by recreating versions of people we don’t like, by complaining about their behavior, wishing they were someone that they’re not, or complaining in general.

Meanwhile the one relationship that empowers us to have a different experience of all we experience awaits us. That relationship is all unconditional love. And when we prioritize that relationship, we become that: Unconditional love.

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This Trans-Attracted Man’s Life Gets Better And Better

TL;DR: The author shares the story of a trans-attracted man who finds bliss in his discovery that his reality comes from stories he tells.

Every time a client texts me with evidence their life is getting better, I delight in the receipt. That’s because I know when they send me such messages, they’re having the time of their lives. It’s also delightful because their improved life amplifies my knowing in this “you create your reality by the stories you tell” business, aka (by some) as “Wishful Thinking”. LOL.

When some people use that “Wishful Thinking” moniker, they’re being pejorative. They don’t believe this “you create your reality by the stories you tell” business is real. They believe that because this “you create your reality by the stories you tell” business is working for them. It’s just reflecting back to them the manifestation of their belief: that this “you create your reality by the stories you tell” business doesn’t work, or it’s pseudoscience or new age quackery.

The jokes on them though because this “you create your reality by the stories you tell” business is working, just like it does for me and all my clients. I love that!

But I love more when clients text me with their wonder. That’s what I’m writing about today.

Beliefs defending themselves

This past week a trans-attracted client finds himself as wonder-filled as I am. Except, he’s finding himself so dumbfounded by his manifestation results, he sometimes slips into disbelief.

I love when that happens too because it means that client finds himself in a Belief Confrontation. A Belief Confrontation is when All That Is shows us something at odds with our beliefs. When that happens, the juxtaposition of our belief, and the reality we’re experiencing at that moment, is so jarring, our belief “defends” itself.

Our belief doesn’t put up its dukes and gets into a fist-fight with the reality. It’s not human after all. But the energy and momentum comprising our belief is strong. And that strong momentum, when confronted with another strong momentum of energy or vibration, experiences a kind of polarity shift. Kind of like when you try put two magnets together and they repulse one another.

When that polarity shift happens in a human, the human feels an emotion. Typically the emotion is negative. That negative emotion comes on instantaneously and can feel so strong it can compel the human into a psychologically defensive stance. They’ll resist that which doesn’t accord with their beliefs. Or they might willfully ignore it.

Our civilization is full of examples illustrating this process underway. And it’s underway all the time, everywhere.

It really works

After clients produce evidence that “you create your reality by the stories you tell” is accurate, force accompanying Belief Confrontations ease, allowing the client to feel the force without it taking them over. That’s what happened with this client. He deserves some praise because he’s significantly soothed his Belief Confrontations around the fact that he’s in the driver’s seat of his life, no one else, and that he can create any life he wants.

So when he texted me, he briefly expressed some disbelief, but followed that up with a string of evidence showing this “you create your reality by the stories you tell” business works. And that balance – between the brief disbelief and the litany of evidence – amplified within him his growing momentum aligning with the belief “this ‘you create your reality by the stories you tell’ business really works!”

Here’s what he texted me:

A trans-attracted client amplifying his belief in this “you create your reality by the stories you tell” business by sharing his powerful results.

There’s no evidence proving this “you create your reality by the stories you tell” business doesn’t work. Again, even for those who think it doesn’t work, it’s working. It’s working by showing those people a reality in which the belief “this ‘you create your reality by the stories you tell’ business doesn’t work” doesn’t work!

But for those willing to soften that belief, those people’s worlds will increasingly show them that this “you create your reality by the stories you tell” business does work. And as that evidence grows, the person will consciously come into their own power. The power they knew they had when they first incarnated as human.

The Charmed Life

We all came here in our human experiences to enjoy our creative power. That includes trans people. We all are incipient gods becoming more in a structure we have created as a part of the consciousness of All That Is. That sure sounds like a circular argument. But that’s only because All That Is is circular in its awareness and purpose.

All That Is is all about one thing: knowing itself through expanding its awareness of itself. That’s its purpose. And it joyfully prosecutes that purpose. We are physical expressions of All That Is seeking to expand its self-awareness. As such, we too can joyfully create our experiences as we move through our human lives.

We don’t have a choice about the expansion or the experience. But we do have a choice in how that experience happens, what’s included in it, what’s not, and how much we enjoy that experience. That’s our innate gift we give ourselves.

And when we choose to deliberately create experiences which bring us joy, then that experience of human life just gets better and better. Just as my clients are seeing in their lives. And as I’m seeing in mine. It’s the Charmed Life. And it’s available to everyone. Even trans people.

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Trans People Aren’t Victims And I’m Not Blaming Them

TL;DR: The author answers a question about whether a person is blaming someone by telling them they create their reality. Then they explain why so many fail to hear their liberating message.

A trans-attracted guy I’m working with recently asked a question about the idea expressed in the phrase “you create your reality.”

He asked “When we tell ourselves a story that people who attract [negative] experiences bring it upon themselves through their [negative] vibration, are we also falling into the vibration of ‘blame’? Do we not all attract [negative] experiences no matter what?”

He went further as an explanation:

“Think about Jesus getting crucified, MLK getting shot, or maybe even any [negative] experience you or me have attracted in recent memory. It seems like the [negative] experiences happen no matter what. Couldn’t the same or similar circumstances still happen to a person with [highly positive] dominant momentum?”

These are excellent questions. Other clients asked similar questions before. And, I know many trans women think I’m blaming them for their troubles when I tell them they’re creating their reality, even though I’m not.

So let’s take a look at these questions as a way of clarifying what’s happening here.

The power we’ve always had

In short, no, I’m not falling into blaming people when I tell them they are creating their reality. Instead, I’m empowering them.

But it’s hard for a trans woman, or anyone really, to hear the empowerment if they’re in a deeply negative state. That’s why a few trans women write me rebutting what I offer.

I’m ok with that. I know how hard it can be to hear someone tell us we’re responsible for the problems we face. But really, who else is creating those circumstances? It seems like others are doing it. But that’s why we keep getting more of those situations; because the universe is trying to show us that, indeed, we’re doing it. And when we stop doing it, our lives improve. We also come into tremendous power. Power that was ours from the get-go.

Experiences a person with strong negative stories has cannot happen to someone else who is consistently telling positive stories. But it’s hard to tell what’s really happening with someone by outward appearances, which is why it’s best to just mind our own damn business.

For example, a client’s relatives were once highly respected church leaders. Congregation members looked up to these people as community paragons. What they didn’t know is what my client knew; that these relatives were drug-addicted alcoholics who struggled with all kinds of problems and they rarely lived behind the scenes according to what they said in church.

Creating life they saw possible

Outward appearances don’t tell the whole story. Neither do the words coming out a person’s mouth. What a person’s life looks like tells a more accurate picture. But even that can be misleading, for many reasons.

The main reason is because we each live in our own realities, separate from others’ realities. This is one reason, by the way, why we have so much power to create any reality we want; no one else exists in our reality but us. And, in that reality, we don’t have full access to another’s reality.

Overlaps do exist between people’s realities. But those overlaps are created by each individual in their own reality. In other words, we only see and experience our version of the overlap. The other person’s experience remains inaccessible.

Again, this explains why so much empowerment exists in “you create your reality”. No one else is in it but us. So we can create any experience we want, including versions of others (the overlap) matching what we want to see. These versions don’t show up in an instant, which explains why it can seem like nothing changes when it actually is changing. And this is also why it’s important to have a guide, someone who knows how this “you create your reality business” works. Such a person can show where evidence exists proving what we want is happening.

And, when a person starts seeing that evidence, joy about life returns. It was always there, but now, the person is returning to their original intent when they chose to come into physical existence: to joyfully create the life they saw possible.

So next let’s look at the leaders my client gave as examples.

About the enlightened ones

First off, Jesus isn’t a good example because he wasn’t a real person. Instead, he acted as an archetype in the imaginations of humankind at the time. Human imagination is akin to All That Is. It is the Source from which everything stems. That environment is also shared by a horde of other beings. All these beings are cooperating to guide humanity as it lives its human existence.

From time to time, humanity as a whole will receive “guidance”. It will come as a massive injection of information, usually in the form of a dream or incident, one that doesn’t happen in physical. The life of Christ was one such experience. Why else do you think there’s no physical evidence of his existence?

MLK, on the other hand was a real person. As such, his experience was different. He came into the world knowing he would have a huge impact on the world. He also knew and accepted and allowed his assassination. There are records showing this. I believe it includes a letter, written in his own hand, describing his awareness. In other words, he allowed it as part of his path.

There are lots of enlightened beings, meanwhile, who die in far more peaceful ways, including the iconic Buddha. More pass peacfully than those whose lives end tragically.

Bad things don’t happen to good people. When they seem to, then our judgement of that person is off, not what happened to them.

The contrast is all good

Now, saying someone brings a negative experience onto themselves can express blame, if the speaker IS in an energy of blaming. When I say this, however, I’m appreciative of the vast empowerment the statement implies. I’m in appreciation of the person I’m talking to; appreciation of the person’s immense power

I talk about this all the time in my blogs. Especially with regard to trans women.

“Bad things” or “contrast” as I call them, happens. But that contrast lessens the more positive we are. So while a person with chronic [negative] vibration will have their purse stolen, for example, a chronic [highly positive] person may drop a glass they were washing. Or they may experience a really hot day. Or they may want to buy something and that thing isn’t on sale anymore. They experience much less intense contrast or negative experiences in other words.

And, since a person who is REALLY highly positive recognizes that all [negative] experience is actually positive, they amplify such experiences…to the point that even these lighter versions do not happen. They happen sometimes, but they’re not experienced as contrasting experiences. It’s just all good.

Helping people find liberation

So no, I’M not “falling into blame” by saying another who experiences [negative] experiences brings it on themselves. Everyone creates their own reality. That’s a statement of empowerment.

But if you, dear reader, are mainly in negative energy you won’t read it as empowering. Instead, you’ll read it as blaming. Everyone hears through the filters of their beliefs, they typically don’t hear what’s actually being said. And so their interpretation can vastly differ from the speaker’s intent.

Again, this explains why some trans women read what I write then double down on their beliefs, their interpretations of the world around them. If you’re one of those people, I’m not saying your interpretation is wrong or invalid. What I am saying is there’s a more empowering interpretation than saying “All the anti-trans legislation is threatening me and my sisters.” or “all men who are interested in me are tranny-chasers”.

Those kinds of interpretations of the world around you can’t possibly feel good. And that not-good-feeling is telling you something important. You may not know what it’s telling you, but that doesn’t mean it’s not trying to tell you.

For those who learn what those not-so-good feelings are saying, then take that message to heart and do something, those people’s lives get better. My clients are living proof of this. My life is too.

So no, I don’t blame trans people for negative experiences they live. I’m trying to liberate them from such experiences. How? By showing them how to liberate themselves…by giving up thinking others are doing something to them.

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Girls: Why The Fuck Do We Tuck?

TL;DR: This is a guest story written by Kari and published with her permission. Kari shares a story in which she revolutionized a lot of feelings about her body, including feelings about her penis. Along the way, she realized many toxic beliefs she – and many trans women – hold. She then encourages a reaching for greater, more empowering freedom.

I recently found myself at the intersection of two converging trajectories or evolutions and while I can see the outcome approaching fast, I don’t know how I feel about it.

Hold onto your butts, we’re going in….

The first evolution was my discovery of dresses last summer.

I had bought a few dresses over the five years I have been out, but never really worn them. Until last summer, that is.

Some of these dresses were sleeveless and that’s where the problem first appeared.

Comfort in my skin

I had spent the first part of summer wearing short sleeve shirts and the result was a set of very pasty shoulders and tanned forearms.

I looked like a farmer…in a bad way:

You say Farmer Tan, I say Ombré Skin Art

So this summer I decided to even out that tan by spending a few minutes each day in the sun in my bikini. The road to degeneracy is, however, paved with good intentions. Changing into a bikini and then back into clothes mid morning started becoming tiresome. So I started just stripping down to my panties and lying in the sun on our private balcony. This resulted in a nice light tan across my entire body except my butt which was extremely pale.

And that’s how I ended up naked, on the balcony in the sun, daily.

This naked sunbathing made me consider my body and how I felt about myself. The act of slowing down and being quiet outside did make me think that naturists are on to something and I am way more comfortable with myself now.

Ladies, if you ever feel unattractive, spend 15 minutes on your back and 15 minutes on your tummy in the sun daily. By the end of summer you will be more comfortable in your skin. There is just something about having sunshine and a light breeze on your naked skin that improves your confidence. At least it did for me.

And next summer I may join a naturist group.

Okay, so I hope y’all into TMI, because we are about to overshare.

“My filly blunt”

The other evolution is a little complicated. Transition is a slow evolutionary process. During this summer, perhaps triggered in part by my nude sunbathing or other factors, my sexuality, or rather my sexual expression, started to surface again.

Let me explain.

When switching your governing hormone your sexuality does some strange stuff. Since starting HRT my entire understanding of my own sexuality and how I express it has been completely rewritten. There was a period, shortly after I started HRT, where I almost completely lost interest in anything sexual. Then about two years ago a slow process of re-emergence started.

Slowly the lights have been coming on again so to speak.

When this happened I noted a shift in who I was attracted to, how I was attracted to them and how I thought about and experienced sex.

I also started to engage with my sexuality and its expression in new ways. An example of this is that I now find pleasure in erotic images of myself. I enjoy sharing erotic but tasteful artistic pictures with my partner. To be blunt, I started sending artsy dick-pics to my partner.

Censorship is the antithesis of free speech and must be resisted in all its manifold forms, specifically this form that deprives the viewer of the majestic image that has been redacted.

Oh and if you’re wondering, judging by the response, dick-pics are just one more thing women just do better than men.

Okay, enough waffling about sunbathing and erotic art, this isn’t an art blog or a sunlight therapy woo page on Facebook. This is a transsexual blog and I know you’re here for the same reasons Republicans and Gender Criticals go to Pornhub.

You’re here for the girl-dick.

So let’s talk about this filly’s blunt.

Exploring my nudity

I can’t speak for men but judging by the quality of the examples of the masculine dick-pics I have seen, men don’t think about their genitals in the same way women do. I think for men a picture of their genitals is a visual cv for their sexual qualities.

They are functional images. Its this big, its this long and its shaped in this manner which will have this effect on you when I use it in these ways. Lighting, context, focus and composition are all lost in the singular pursuit of graphic exposure. The male dick-pic is the construction drawing of nude art.

Before transition I didn’t understand the dick-pic. I assumed it was a matter of dysphoria. Showing nudes of myself that featured my penis just felt uncomfortable and ugly.

I hated it.

However, this summer I decided to explore the art of nude self portraits. I had seen a particular content creator on Instagram who specifically makes erotic self portraits via photography and I like her stuff, so I decided to try it myself.

Over the last few months, whenever I have been inspired, I have taken photos of myself in various states of undress.

“Proudly displaying their junk”

One of the things I noted very quickly was that I didn’t have that alien feeling when genitals were visibly in the images, either explicitly or implied by “the bulge”. In fact, I started to see the beauty in these photos. I didn’t see a person struggling with discordant genitals or pathetically resigned to the misery of not being able to do anything about her penis.

I legitimately saw a naked woman with a beautiful dick.

Of course the question that raised itself to me was, did I find this girl-dick beautiful because its mine and attached to me or was it all girl-dicks that had suddenly become beautiful?

My questions led me to the Trans-HiveMind.

I went back to Tumblr.

And on Tumblr I found a lot of girl-dick.

I found trans women proudly displaying their junk and trans women not so proudly displaying their junk with captions asking “would you still date me if you knew about my dick?”

Looking at these images I noted the “would you date a trans woman” posts are as tragic as those Only Fans Milfs on Insta who aim their content at middle-aged dude’s crotches.

Ladies, men don’t need begging.

Why the Fuck do we Tuck?

The posts made by trans women who are clearly comfortable with their genitals on the other hand are beautiful. In fact they are as beautiful as images of women with vaginas.

However, this is not an article to sing the praises of and promote the beauty of girl-dick.

I have far more sinister motives than that and we already know girl-dick is gorgeous.

What I am saying is girl-dick is no less desirable or beautiful or feminine than girl-vagina and when we accept this simple truth, we must ask: Why the Fuck do we Tuck?

We don’t tuck because our genitals are ugly.

We don’t tuck because it’s comfortable.

We don’t even tuck because we suffer dysphoria.

Rock it unapologetically

We tuck because we have been told by heteronormative society that women have vaginas and if your crotch isn’t a smooth, flat front then you are a man.

We have internalized the idea that we cannot be beautiful women when we have a little extra in our undies. We believe men see us, trans women, as second class because we don’t have a genital configuration that ignorance and regressive societal rules have mandated as the gold standard.

Today’s gaff is, for trans women, no different from last century’s whale boned corset for cis women. We don’t need to squeeze our organs into new positions and uncomfortable contortions to be beautiful. We don’t have to mould ourselves to the society’s regressive ideas to be beautiful.

We simply need to rock that bulge unapologetically and one day, society will catch up.

One day, a trans woman is going to walk down the catwalk at Paris Fashion week untucked and no one is going to bat an eye about the girl-dick.

Well, maybe I do know how I feel about the outcome of that intersection now.

Maybe I want to say: Vive le pénis féminin!

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Why Science Took So Long To “Discover” This Great Truth

(Photo by Alex Hockett)

TL;DR: The author asserts that while science has benefitted mankind, it is directly influenced by eternal, conscious spiritual energy underlying the human condition. They discuss this assertion by examining modern research confirming that physical disease stems from thoughts and beliefs; something every trans and trans-attracted person could benefit from knowing.

Looks like science is finally catching up to spirituality. This is really good news for trans and trans-attracted people. That’s because, like many people, these people put a lot of faith and trust in science.

That faith and trust is problematic when it comes to being trans and trans-attracted. Even with that faith and trust in science, many trans and trans-attracted people struggle mightily with who and what they are. Sure, medication can and does help. But even then, struggle remains. Especially when these people’s reality continues reflecting back to them their disempowering thoughts and beliefs.

When it comes to understanding how powerful thoughts and beliefs are, science is out of its league. Which is why science can’t help people with creating their reality. But spiritualists have been helping all people find relief, then freedom then joy by showing people the power they inherently possess. People are extremely powerful. They use that power to create their reality. This includes trans and trans-attracted people.

What’s interesting is, science is just beginning to lear what Spiritualists have known for eons. Recent scientific “discoveries” are proving this.

And that’s what I’m writing about today. I’m writing about scientific research pointing to the connection between thoughts people have early in life and how those thoughts literally create debilitating and deadly illnesses later in life.

Let’s get to it.

Thoughts and beliefs matter

As I wrote above, Spiritualists such as myself have known forever that our thoughts and beliefs are the source of physical reality. Physical reality includes our physical bodies. Therefore, our physical bodies spring from thoughts we think and beliefs we hold.

If we think we were born in the wrong body, power inherent in that belief will create unpleasant realities. This explains why some trans people holding such a belief, become overweight as they get older. Their resistant belief causes them to take action (overeating) in an attempt to soothe those negative beliefs. It’s also why some of those trans people, when they accept their bodies, through physical transformation, lose significant weight.

Thoughts are powerful. They’re so powerful, they can create any reality we want. But consciousness is more powerful than thought. It also enjoys a quality thoughts do not: consciousness is free. It can literally do, be or have whatever it can conceive.

Together, thoughts, beliefs and consciousness represent an awesome combination. This freedom and power enable a consciousness to also create things it does not want. Again, the spiritual community has known this since the beginning. We know, for example, that humans create every experience in their lives, including that body in which they are born.

That’s why spiritual teachers constantly stress the importance of being conscious of one’s thoughts and beliefs. It’s also why we encourage people not to allow others’ thoughts and beliefs into one’s consciousness, unless those thoughts and beliefs are aligned with one’s desires.

Thoughts and beliefs are building blocks of everything we experience. Now it seems some corners of science are beginning to agree. One of those corners is the body of research known as “Adverse Childhood Experiences” (ACEs).

What are ACEs?

An ACE is an exposure to one or more family-of-origin condition which sociologically can be generalized as negative. Researchers put them in three categories: Abuse, neglect and household disfunction:

Categories in which ACEs are organized.

According to ACEs research these events pose an extreme risk to childhood development, and long-term adult health. As Wikipedia describes it: “Scientific evidence is mounting that such adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) have a profound long-term effect on health. Research shows that exposure to abuse and to serious forms of family dysfunction in the childhood family environment are likely to activate the stress response, thus potentially disrupting the developing nervous, immune, and metabolic systems of children.[2][3][4] ACEs are associated with lifelong physical and mental health problems that emerge in adolescence and persist into adulthood,[5] including cardiovascular disease, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, autoimmune diseases, substance abuse, and depression.[6][7][8]“

The “stress response” identified in the research causing “disruption” is important. That’s because it’s not the stress response that creates the disruption.

But science’s focus on stress response as the cause isn’t surprising. Science rests all its “discoveries” on the belief that an objective reality exists. There’s no such thing as an objective reality though. Reality, all of it, springs from within consciousness. It therefore is subjective, not objective.

Humans invented and practice science. “Human” is an experience of consciousness. Because of that, science too, is an experience of consciousness. Science therefore is subject to conscious focus, making all it researches subject to the focus consciousness brings to it.

I’m going to get back to all this in a moment because it explains why it’s taking so long for science to understand what spiritualists have known for eons. But for now, let’s look at this “stress response” in more detail.

What is stress?

Stress isn’t an emotion. Stress is, however, a physical state arising from an emotional experience. It (stress) shows up in the body when a person interprets an experience (a stressor) as physically or psychologically threatening or challenging. “Interprets” is an act of thinking. So we can say that when one thinks something is challenging or threatening, then they will feel the physical effect in the body called “stress”.

We know not everyone experiences stressors similarly. One person’s stressor can be another’s “normal” or even their happy place. The difference lies in how each person interprets or thinks about the experience.

So stress results from thinking about the experience, not the experience itself. Indeed, research confirm this. From a Wikipedia article on stress (the underlined portion is ours):

“Stress is a non-specific response.[5] It is neutral, and what varies is the degree of response. It is all about the context of the individual and how they perceive the situation…A stressor is inherently neutral meaning that the same stressor can cause either distress or eustress. It is individual differences and responses that induce either distress or eustress.[8]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_stress#Causes

Stress then, is a physical manifestation. It is a physical reality showing up in the body. It manifests when a consciousness interprets – thinks about something – in a particular way: A thought happens and from that thought a manifestation results: stress.

“Stress response” then, indicated as the cause of disruption when exposed to an ACE, is not the cause of the disruption. It is a response to the cause.

Another word we could use to describe “disruption” is “manifestation”. “Stress responses” don’t cause “manifestations”. Stress responses are manifestations. Disruptions, therefore, are further-evolved versions of the stress-response manifestation.

Let’s look at what I mean.

It’s circular logic but accurate

First there is energy. Energy is all there is. It is All That Is. You and I are vibrational energy. Energy comprises everything. And all that energy is aware, conscious and mobile. Energy, therefore is conscious, aware action.

Because it is action, it gives rise to vibration. When conscious energy focuses itself, the vibration it emits gives rise to a predecessor of thought. That predecessor I call thought form. It is not yet a thought. But the evolution or momentum of energy’s vibration, as that energy focuses itself, continues gaining momentum. When further evolved conscious energy, such as a human, perceives thought form, the focus on that form evolves the thought form further into what humans know as a “thought”.

If you dismissively think this is circular logic, then you’re dismissing the fundamental nature of All That Is. All That Is is circular in nature. It exists to become more. And it does that by knowing itself. That’s circular!

So when some trans women reading my stories dismissively accuse me of circular logic, they don’t realize they’re accurately describing what the Universe is all about. It’s circular in its basic foundation! So my logic accords with how All That Is actually works!

By the time conscious energy that has evolved itself through thought into a manifested form such as a human, when that human perceives thought, that thought is “perceived” through a process of attraction. By attraction, I simply mean “like attracts like” or an energetic resonance like two magnets attracting each other. Thoughts aligned with the energy perceiving the thoughts get drawn to the perceiving energy. When that happens, those thoughts become perceptible. Then momentum begins.

Reality is circular.

How thoughts create disease

That momentum will draw other energy like itself until the energy further expands or evolves. Spiritual people call the evolution of energy “manifestation”; thoughts become things. That happens through manifestation or the evolution of energy as I’ve described above.

So when a person interprets a stressor, they’re thinking. The person is an evolved – a manifested – form of energy in action. Their thinking process is nothing more than attraction in action. When the person interprets a stressor as a threat or challenge, that act of interpretation or thought begins a process of energetic evolution of action energy. The thought evolves from thought form, into thought then into a physical manifestation: stress in the body. Science and psychology call that physical manifestation the “stress response”.

As with all manifestation and focus, momentum ensues. The person focusing on a threat or challenge, by the nature of their focus, generates more energy action – momentum – in other words. That momentum, spurred by the person’s continued focus, must evolve, attract and become more. The “more” here is what researchers are calling “disruption.”

They’re using the word “disruption” because typically that describes an interruption of the normal processes of the body becoming more. As the body evolves or grows or matures more in line with focus given by the energy inhabiting the body (the personality or person), natural, positive processes of action/evolution take place. These positive processes are how a child’s body grows into an healthy adult one.

But when the person chronically manifests “stress” in their body, that chronic stress interrupts those processes. The interruptions lead to disease. The person’s thoughts, therefore, are what produces disease not the disruption or the stress. Stress and disruption aren’t the cause. They are intermediary steps. Which brings us elegantly, wonderfully, back to the ACEs.

ACE-Disease Correlation

Researchers realized in the mid-1990s stunning associations between these ACEs and nearly every chronic psychological and physical problem. To spiritualists, this is not a “discovery”. We’ve known that thoughts create reality since forever.

Yet these associations are worth noting. That’s because, even though every person is more spiritual than anything else, a remarkably large number discount their spiritual nature in practice, choosing instead to focus like science does: on an objective reality separate from themselves. One in which things can happen to them against their will, where luck is a thing, where “bad things happen to good people” and where “in every life a little rain must fall”.

ACEs researchers in Montana realized remarkable correlations between ACE exposure and disease of all kinds in both children and adults. For example:

  • Children with an ACE score of 1 are 19.6% more likely to develop a chronic condition requiring above routine amount or type of health care services, almost doubling to 36.1% with 2+ ACEs.
  • Children with an ACE score of 1 are 26.9% more likely to be overweight or obese, with minimal change to 26.7% with 2+ ACEs.
  • Adults with an ACE score of 4 or more are 1220% more likely to attempt suicide, 1003%
    more likely to use injected drugs, 460% more likely to have recent depression, and 390%
    more likely to have lung disease.
  • Adults with an ACE score of 2 or more are 400% more likely to consider themselves an
    ‘alcoholic.’
  • Finally, at least 5 of the top 10 leading causes of death are associated with ACEs.

What I see here are disempowering thoughts manifesting into mental and physical disease and death. I wrote “disempowering” on purpose. That’s because there’s another manifestation that happens before the stress response. We should look at that next.

We overlook important clues: our emotions

The action of thought turning to things includes a step we’ve ignored up to now. That step comes in between attracting a thought and the manifestation that thought evolves into. Every person is familiar with this intermediary step. Yet, they don’t realize how powerful and important that step is. We humans call that step “emotion”.

Every thought we think produces an emotion. That’s obvious for really strong thoughts, ones with a lot of momentum behind them. And yet every thought comes associated with an emotion.

Emotions tell us something critical. Ignoring that message is what contributes to creating “negative” manifestations including those which interrupt bodily evolution and create disease.

One of the most important message emotions offer is they tell us what manifestations we have in the works are going to be like when they become “reality”. The message couldn’t be clearer. Emotions that feel good tell us manifestations we have underway are aligned with what we’re wanting to experience. Emotions that don’t feel good tell us manifestations we’re creating are not aligned with what we’re wanting to experience.

What we want or don’t want is shaped by the collection of core values and intents as well as desires day-to-day experiences stimulate from within us. Our wants include every possible conception. From how we want to feel psychologically and physically, to the life we want to enjoy, and the death we prefer.

Our lack of connection to these emotional clues explains how most of us create terrible manifestations; ones we think we would never create for ourselves. And yet we do.

Let’s look at how and why.

Learning ourselves

No one, it seems, would create on purpose getting raped or dying in a terror attack as a manifestation. No one would choose to experience losing their job or ending up homeless or addicted to meth. Many people would even say that no one would choose to be born trans.

But if you look at what I’ve shared so far, you can see quite logically how people would end up in such situations. These things aren’t happening to them. As hard as it may be to accept it, these experiences are springing from them. From the thoughts and beliefs they as a point of consciousness have allowed into themselves.

In other words, something in them attracts negative thoughts. It could be previous experiences in this life in which they’ve formed negative thoughts or beliefs. Perhaps it’s a thought or belief they’ve accepted from another. Or it could be a thought or belief they bring from a previous life. Yes, the energy incarnating as human is eternal. It has and will forever exist as it moves through progressive experiences (lives) as a way of knowing itself. Just like All That Is does.

Tragedies aren’t random. (Photo by John Middelkoop)

Resonance between that “something” and the thought it attracts causes the attracted thought to bind into place. It joins in the individual’s vibrational mix. Momentum ensues from the binding. Then that thought will cause the person to take action, action that will rendezvous the person with a reality reflecting back to that person the vibrational mix inside them.

In this way, conscious energy incarnate as human learns what it has in its vibrational mix. So these reflections, what humans call physical reality, are how conscious energy knows itself.

Constant clues coming for our benefit

I laid out a detailed progression describing how a person ends up creating an experience whereby she is raped. So I won’t detail the progression again. There are an infinite number of ways a point of conscious can manifest any negative experience, including rape.

But there are as many ways a point of consciousness can manifest any positive experience too. And this is where the empowerment of what you’re reading comes in. It’s also why All That Is includes people like me, spiritualists, who are here constantly reminding people what they are.

We all create our reality. When trans women read that, most immediately go to “victimhood” or “disempowerment”: “I didn’t create this thing I suffer from”, they say. They rarely go to “empowerment”: “Really? That means I can create ANYTHING! Show me how!”

Along the way to every manifestation, we constantly get clues about what we’re creating. Emotions are just one of those clues. What shows up is yet another. A person doesn’t go from being happy to getting raped. Along that path, they experience ever more intense clues giving them a heads up as to what’s coming, starting with emotion. Abraham makes it plain:

But if the person ignores the early clues, then they’ll keep coming, until the clues are so intense they can’t be ignored.

So now, with all this in your mind, let’s look at why science is so slow in discovering things like the direct connection between thoughts and physical disease.

The slow pace of science

Speaking of clues, the ACEs research gives us a lot of clues as to why it takes science so long to realize what spiritualists have known for eons. The first reason is obvious: science depends on an objective reality as the basis of the Universe. This is a complete distortion.

Reality is 100 percent subjective. A consensus reality exists, in which all consciousness agrees on some basic assumptions. But any individual consciousness can breach even those assumptions if their focus is strong enough. As such, no individual’s experience resembles another no matter how similar it physically appears. This is readily testable and, if the test is done correctly, over time, will produce convincing results for any individual.

From Wikipedia: The basic assumptions of science’s scientific method.

And that’s the problem with science and its inability to quickly get to what’s really happening in the Universe. It requires agreement. That’s a problem.

Since we’re all experiencing our own, separate realities, we can create any reality we desire and quickly. But because science and other methods have almost forced us to focus more on the consensus reality instead of our individual one, it can take a long time to manifest our desires. What’s more, many of those same methods, including science, make pronouncements totally out of whack with what’s really happening, by claiming some things impossible, that, actually, are not.

Anything the Universe inspires us to conceive can be our experience. THAT is a basic premise of the Universe. But if a person disbelieves the inspiration, or a body of knowledge says it’s impossible and the person believes that, then that person will not be able to go against their powerful focus. Their focus telling them it is impossible.

The power of focus limits or expands

And this is why science moves forward as though through molasses. Scientists believe in an objective reality. So the Universe presents that to them because they believe such a reality exists. Meanwhile, science also believes that which is real must be repeatable by others and agreed to by those same others. So the Universe offers that as the criteria by which science proves its “discoveries”.

Further, laws science has “discovered” and banks on, by those laws, makes some things, in scientist’s, view impossible. Other interpretations or experiences they dismiss as pseudoscience or delusions or hallucinations. At best they consider them “unexplainable”.

All of this greatly slows down “discoveries” science makes. All the while, people like me are proving things to be much different than what science claims. I know, for example that thoughts become things. I know that children aren’t innocently born as blank slates. They come into the world as wise, eternal beings, here to explore themselves in this unique plane. And because they are eternal, they come into the world with a strong trajectory of past interpretations of past experiences; an eternal collection which shapes their values and intents.

Those intents include some things we could call “good” and some we would likely call “bad”. All of those intents are being worked through in collaboration and cooperation with every other point of consciousness human and non human. That collaboration is what comprises All That Is. It also comprises the world in which you and I seem to live.

And none of those things you or I don’t want to experience need be a part of our experience. But they will if we invite them. And we invite them through our focused thoughts.

This is a powerful, eternal being. Not a blank slate. (Photo by Alex Hockett)

Spirit-infused science

That’s why so many struggle in life. They don’t know what you just read. So they invite all kinds of things they don’t want, while doubling down on beliefs that encourage doing that. They think luck is real, including bad luck. They believe life is random and that bad things can happen to them against their will.

It’s why parents perpetuate Adverse Childhood Experiences to their children. Of course, children coming into those experiences are choosing those experiences, so no harm, no foul because there are no victims. And yet, the world we see with all its wars, anti-trans legislation, transphobia, pain and poverty reflects the total state of consciousness and the all-that-is-ness of All That Is.

And in all that, everything is, ultimately, good. If more people can get to that point – seeing all as good – then the world will truly be a better place. But for now, too many people are looking at the world and all the “bad” out there. And through that focus they feel bad about the world, not knowing that bad feeling tells them they are creating more of what they’re feeling bad about.

So this isn’t a story about the age-old fight between spirituality and science. What it is is an attempt to show that there is as valid a source of wisdom in spirituality as there is science. Indeed, I’d say there’s more value in spirituality.

Why?

Because all we experience is spiritual. Including the scientific method. After all, many scientific discoveries (all of them actually) come through dreams, ideations while showering or in similar situations where the mind is on auto-pilot. In other words, times when conciousness is given free rein to tap into All-That-Is-wisdom.

The future of gods

That process has allowed science to give us all kinds of “breakthroughs”. Science therefore is benefiting us. From an individual perspective, however, we each can move much faster towards a life we desire by casting off reliance on science and instead relying on our essential natures, which are literally infinitely more capable, powerful and expansive. Limitless really.

Doing so requires intense focus. That’s because we must release beliefs most of us hold which block that limitless capability. Everything is possible. And, that limitless possibility expresses itself best at the level of the individual. The individual possessing the knowledge spiritualists have known forever: that we are gods in human form. And everything is possible to those who know themselves as such.

The being who chooses to come into the world through families with many of these ACE conditions or as a trans person are no different. Imagine powerful intentions such experiences spark in them. For when we know what we don’t want, we also know what we want. Any one of those people who line up with what they want, instead of what they don’t will, in rapid fashion, create astonishing worlds.

Which is why I write about how wonderful trans women are.

As it is, however, science burdens such people with “trauma” and labels like “gender dysphoria” thereby fostering more momentum behind thoughts manifesting chronic mental and physical imbalances.

At some point I know scientists will realize their error as they did around homosexuality being a mental illness or sin, or women and black people being inferior. When they do, we will be in a completely different world. Where science acknowledges the Source of all it knows: the spirit world.

We still have a ways to go before we get there though. And that’s ok.