Editors note: This true story comes from a The Transamorous Network client who is six months into their 1:1 membership. It shows how our services not only connect one with their ideal match in time, but they also transform every other part of life, making it an ideal romp of ease, fun and joy.
My mom and I are moving. She can’t get her beloved grand piano into the new house we’re moving into, she’s going to have to sell it, and buy an upright piano. She contacted a specialist who came and valued it at £5000, but from that, he would take commission and the cost of restoration.
This didn’t seem right to me and I had the thought “I’m sure this piano is worth more.”
So a few days later I was shopping in my favourite wholefood and organic cleaning and beauty products shop. It is run by Jess – a friendly and enterprising South African man who I’ve always felt an attraction to.
I went in there to buy some cheap little Christmas gifts and got chatting as I normally do. Somehow the topic of music came up and he revealed that in a former life he had been a master Piano restorer and technician and salesman for the prestigious Kensington piano company in London.
He also revealed that he had left because of the underhand way piano businesses operate, and he had gone solo, building up an extensive and prestigious client base, including royalty, Yoko Ono and the Royal Academy of music in London.
I told him about my mum’s piano and after a few questions he said to me “I’m sure it’s worth a lot more.” I asked him if he would come and value it for a fee.
Knowing that I was also in the music business, he said to me “well I know everything there is to know about acoustic pianos. But I’m in the market for a vintage Fender Rhodes or Wurlitzer piano, and I know nothing about electric pianos. If you could get me a good electric piano from the 70s era, I’ll come and do the valuation for free.”
I put a post on Facebook, and within an hour or two my uncle, who happens to run a piano tuning and keyboard hire business, contacted me to let me know he had one available. I’ve put Jess and my uncle in contact and it turns out they both worked with the same piano restorer colleague many years ago.
It gets better…
Two days ago Jess came and valued my mum’s piano and has already found a buyer for it for £10,000, double the original valuation. No need for restoration, and no commission.
This morning I picked up the Wurlitzer from my uncle who happened to be in London on a piano tuning job … Jess and my uncle have not yet spoken about money, however Jess told me that he has some very lucrative business opportunities and propositions for my uncle.
When I picked up the keyboard this morning, my uncle asked me what price he should sell it for. I gave him my opinion but added he might want to consider Jess’s business proposition before charging him anything at all. If he gives you some really lucrative work, I said, maybe you’d like to give him the keyboard for free. He agreed.
The keyboard comes without legs. One or two Facebook posts later, I had sourced same exact model legs and could be in receipt of them within days. My plan is to give them to Jess for free. They only cost about £200, but we are making an extra £5000 on the basis of his goodwill.
So Jess gets to pass on his business and he gets a free keyboard. We get a free valuation and double our money! And I get to broker satisfaction for everyone! Yippeee!
Editor’s note: In this series, we’ll highlight conversations with our readers/viewers. We think folks will benefit from these conversations. All names are made up to protect everyone’s privacy:
Dear The Transamorous Network,
I think I just want to be loved for me and feel like I matter to someone. I have been invisible to the women I had been drawn to and treated like trash by those that I did have relationships with. I did meet a transwoman that I was very attracted to more than physically but the fear of being penetrated again (I’m a survivor of molestation) caused me to flee when the time came to get physical.
I’ve been in doomed relationships ever since. I feel I missed out on a chance to be happy with someone. I guess fear and dogma have a lot to do with why so many shy from these relationships. I’d try again with a transwoman if she made me feel safe in the relationship.
I love feminine bodies but have grown weary of ciswomen’s mind games. Which, I’m sure, makes me an asshole. We’ll.. that’s my rant.
Clifton
Hey Clifton,
Wow, there are a lot of stories you have going on in this “rant”. Have you read our content on our website? It would be helpful if you did.
Take, for example, the story “I’ve been in doomed relationships ever since”. How on earth are you to have a fun, enjoyable and fulfilling relationship with anyone (including yourself) if you believe every relationship is a “doomed” one? You can’t!
Another powerful story: “I feel I missed out on a chance to be happy with someone.” You can never miss out because there’s always another relationship on the way. And…each subsequent one is better than the one before it. But you can’t know that though if you “…feel I missed out on a chance to be happy with someone.” With that story, you only get what the story is creating: regret, loneliness and longing.
That sucks.
But life is supposed to be fun and full of fulfilled desire.
There are other even more unhelpful stories you’re telling here. All of them shape your experience. The good news is, you don’t have to have experiences tied to these stories. But you must stop telling these stories first, to have the other experiences. We show people how to do that.
More good news: you said “I guess fear and dogma have a lot to do with why so many shay away from these relationships”. That’s absolutely accurate. There are other reasons too, many of which apply to you. We can say that based on what you wrote here. But your slight awareness of what you have going on can lead you out of troubles you’re experiencing. It all begins with the stories you’re telling.
I know what I want, when I get it, makes me happy. I also know when I’m happy I set up more future happy moments.
But since every time I get what I want, I am happy, I can just be happy, even when I’m not getting what I want.
I can be happy now, no matter what is happening.
This is the basis of our work at The Transamorous Network. I know when I put my happiness first, by telling stories about my life that make me happy, I put myself on a path to living a happy life. That’s because a happy life looks like feeling happy in every moment.
What happens in my life, when I’m not deliberate about choosing happiness, determines how I feel. But life doesn’t have to be that way. I can turn it around. I can choose to be happy, no matter what I’m experiencing, then experience good things always.
I know when I do that my life fills with happy experiences. Such as meeting transgender women in delightful ways. I know this because I’ve tried it and it has always worked out that way. I also know this because my The Transamorous Network clients get exactly the same results.
It’s a bit more complicated than that, but in a short while, I’ve created a life filled with happy experiences. So have my clients.
So this holiday season, I appreciate what I’ve realized: That life is happy when I am happy. And the happier I am, the more my life shapes to my happiness. In my happiness, I don’t need my life to change. But because I’m not focused on my life needing to change, because I’m not telling stories about how bad my life is, my life changes.
It’s a paradox, but it’s true.
I’m grateful for what I’ve discovered. And I’m loving seeing people who have come to me seeking relief from anxiety, insecurities, shame and other life problems, find relief and more, simply by telling better stories.
I appreciate knowing life is supposed to be fun, joyful and filled with fulfilled desires. I appreciating having such a life. And I appreciate sharing what I know with others, then seeing their life turn out that way too.
The easiest, most fun way to find yourself in a rewarding relationship with your ideal transgender partner is by becoming a match to your ideal. You do that by telling positive stories about life.
Speaking practically, telling positive stories creates positive life experiences. Consistent positive story telling creates momentum. Momentum held long enough, will draw your ideal partner right into your bed, guaranteed.
Simple experiments prove this. One need not understand or believe metaphysical or spiritual explanations for why this happens.
Think about it: if you want that beautiful, smart, confident, strong, capable courageous, proud and powerful transgender woman, and you are not beautiful, smart, confident, strong, capable courageous, proud and powerful, you’re not a match to what you want. You get what you think about, what you “be” about, i.e. what you tell stories about.
The stories you tell become who you are. From there, your life experience literally erupts from you, creating experience, people and events matching your stories. Everyone does this all day every day. Most don’t realize they’re doing it.
Why does life work this way?
Positive stories cause human senses to filter out anything not perceived positive. Again: our senses filter experience all day every day, allowing only experiences consistent with our persistent stories. Many transgender women, on balance, are fairly negative, so their life experiences match that.
Same with trans-attracted men’s stories about themselves, about life, probably and about transgender women. If one’s beliefs about trans women aren’t consistent with the trans woman one wants, guess what kind of trans woman one meets? If ones stories about themselves aren’t empowering, inspiring, positive and joyful, one gives off “vibes” consistent with disempowering, uninspiring, negative stories. It’s simple.
You may ask: What about people who seem positive? Why do they have seeming random negative events happen? Someone once told me a story of a trans woman they believed was always positive. She even practiced “the power of positive thinking”. Yet, someone murdered this trans woman.
The thing about creating reality is, one best knows what reality they’re creating in two ways: how they feel, and what shows up in their reality. It’s near impossible to tell what another has in their collection of stories by watching how they behave, or what they say. It’s much better watching how their life goes.
A lot of people who appear positive and happy, are not. They are insecure, lonely, they feel vulnerable, afraid and judged. Many seemingly successful and happy people exemplified this. Robin Williams, Freddie Prinze, Anthony Bourdain, Margaux Hemingway, Daniel Lee Martin, Philip Seymour Hoffman and many others struggled with pain and depression, finally taking their own lives when they appeared on the surface as “successful”.
So people usually have both positive and negative stories going on in their heads at the same time. Their lives include events exemplifying both.
Random negative experiences, such as getting robbed or raped, hit by a bus, or assaulted for being trans aren’t random. They come from long-term focus on negative stories or mixed stories with a negative ones outweighing positive ones.
The benefit of emotions
Often people can’t hear stories they’re telling. That’s why humans come equipped with emotions. Negative stories feel like “fear”, “insecurity”, “worry” or “victimhood”. Told often enough such stories become the person.
From the person then erupts experiences, people and events consistent with stories they’ve become. That’s why people get robbed, raped, hit by a bus or assaulted for being trans.
The same things happen for shame-filled trans-attracted men. Their negative stories about their attraction matches them to trans women who share similar (although not identical) stories. In other words, such men meet trans women who are not beautiful, smart, confident, strong, capable courageous, proud and powerful.
Often such feelings get past one’s perception because one focuses too much on what’s happening outside their head. Focus works best when it predominantly focuses on what’s happening inside one’s head first, since everything happening outside one’s head springs from what happens inside one’s head.
Negativity owes itself to positivity
Very few people chronically tell positive stories. There are many people, and a lot of trans women telling negative stories though. Everyone’s life matches their stories.
But even negative story tellers from time to time experience positive experiences. They do because a little positivity overwhelms tons of negativity. It does because negative “energy” isn’t an energy. Negative “energy” is what happens when positive energy gets diminished.
In other words, negative “energy” owes its existence to its relativity to positive energy. It has no substance, no independent existence of its own. It is defined by a lack of positivity.
What’s more, a chronically negative person still is, at the core, pure positive energy. That energy, no matter how obscured it may be by negative focus, still can overcome its overshadowed state when the negative-focused person drops their guard.
When he’s not paying attention, asleep or doing something “mindless” such as driving a car, taking a shower or experiencing something fun, positive focus’ power eeks through. That’s why a negative person can sometimes experience positive experiences.
Positive benefits feel fun
When I’m positive and excited by my positive stories, when I’m enthusiastic and eager about what I’m up to (or planning), I open up. I’m open to possibility, I see things consistently negative people can’t.
The world is full of delights.
Staying positive I produce results easily and fast. More important, on the way to those outcomes, I enjoy life more. That means life experience becomes more entertaining, more fun, more positive.
“Happy accidents”, what some people call “luck”, happen often for people telling positive stories. It’s not luck, but who cares what it’s called? Through such events problems solve themselves faster compared to focusing on the problem, trying to find a solution or trying to make a solution work.
When negative, one sees more negativity. Such focus turns things into “impossible problems.” When someone filters life through negative stories, the sheer enormity of bad things in the world overwhelms awareness. Every Transamorous guy becomes a “tranny chaser”. Every trans woman is a potential victim, every trans woman a guy meets ends up being a skeezer, working girl or gold digger.
A lot of people stand in such negative stories. Yet no such experiences need happen to anyone.
That’s incredibly naive
Someone reading this may not believe a bit of it. The majority of people believe negative situations described above are just natural parts of being trans-attracted, transgender or human.
I know, and my clients know, this is NOT NATURAL. Anyone well-practiced in telling positive stories discovers this.
A Positively Focused person knows her life experience springs ongoingly from her, not others. So she focuses on the one thing that really matters: her focus, not what others say, do or believe. Which is why my clients sometimes find their old friends getting on their nerves. My clients become so positive and their old friends’ chronic negativity so obvious, they become like oil and water: intolerable of each other.
Here’s the critical thing about being negative: It’s very hard to turn that train around. A life-long “realistic”, pessimistic or negative person may feel right about the world they experience. And they will be right.
They’ll be right because life experience springs from their stories. That doesn’t mean an alternative experience, one in which all desires fulfill themselves, including desire to have their ideal partner in their bed, doesn’t exist.
Momentum is momentum though. It takes a lot of work initially reversing negative-focus momentum. Since lives full of fulfilled desires are possible for everyone, that work pales in comparison to benefits derived, making the effort worth it.
Desires fulfilling themselves.It’s a life available to anyone, because everyone at their core is positively focused. It’s worth it. It’s fun and it’s everyone’s birthright. Even for trans and trans-attracted people.
Not living one’s birthright, in my opinion, is living. But just barely. Wanting that ideal woman in your bed is no fun if all you have is an empty bed.
Anita Noelle Green accomplished a lot in her short time on the planet. She’s run for political office, participated in many pageants, runs a gamer enterprise and moved from her home town in Montana to resettle in Portland. We interviewed Anita in her home before COVID. Spend some time with her today as she talks about her life, being trans, coming out as trans and wanting to live a life worth living. Watch the interview in two parts here, or on our YouTube Channel.
