There’s nothing better than feeling happy. Feeling happy is the start of all you want. It’s also the end of all you want: All you do you, do because you think you’ll feel better doing it. “Feel better” means getting closer and closer to feeling happy. So why not take the shortcut?
I recently conversed with a transamorous man who recently met a transwoman. He loves transwomen (obviously) but, while he is open to transwomen about his attraction, he’s not yet out to others. In other words, he’s not living an authentic, out-loud life.
I recently also had a conversation with a married transgender woman, a beautiful person from the EU. She just recently married and, to my surprise, the family of her husband (a cis man) doesn’t know she is transgender.
Now, I’ve spoken to so many transamorous men who are living their lives out loud, I am absolutely convinced there is power, joy and freedom in living transamorously, out loud. Gone is the fear. Gone is the stress. Got is the hiding. Gone is the drama.
And you know, what you fear being discovered is actually already known by others. They may not know the specifics. But they know. You think you’re hiding your attraction, but others pick up on your insecurity. Not only that, the women you find yourself attracted to also pick on it.
Sadly enough, when you’re living in the closet about your trans attraction, insecure about what others might think or say about you, you bring into your life perfect-match transwomen: transwomen who, like you, are equally as insecure. I guess that’s not so sad because you create your reality. Meaning, you can bring into your life dream-trans-women. But to do that, you first have to come to terms with yourself.
So if only for the reason of meeting better matches, it behooves you to learn to accept who and what you are and live your life out loud. It’s 2018 for goodness sakes! The world is in upheaval in the face of the transgender movement. Now is the perfect time to declare who you are.
It’s an interesting question. This articlearticle takes a good, long look at that question. It begins with recounting the murder of a transwoman, so be forewarned…
The article’s main message is, you’re transphobic if you think a person who is trans needs to tell potential suitors that fact before they engage in a relationship. The argument goes that a person who is not attracted to transwomen will want to know ahead of time who they are getting involved with. Because if that person is transgender, there is a possibility the cis-person (or other variety of human) won’t choose to be with that person.
I guess the same argument could be made for being racist: if somehow black people could conceal their blackness, racists would want to know ahead of time whether the person they find themselves interested in is black, so they can check their interest.
Sounds dumb, right? I mean, in order for a person to want to be sure they aren’t interested in said black person is because they are somehow interested in them, right? Interestingly, we don’t have to worry about that because black people can’t conceal their blackness. Most anyway. As a result, people who make their partner choices based on skin color alone can merrily avoid all us niggers. lol.
Not so with transgender people apparently.
Which is the point, I think, of the article. Not that all transgender people conceal their trans ness…many actually do. Intentionally and unintentionally. But that’s not the point I’m making. I’m saying it’s quite possible that a person who is scared of being with a transgender person can easily find themselves attracted to a transgender person before discovering the person is indeed trans. I mean have you seen Dusty Rose? This of course has happened in many of the trans murder cases in recent years.
But being scared of a person because they are trans is an interesting thing.
The author puts it more plainly:
None of this means it is transphobic to not be attracted to individual trans people. Nor is it transphobic to not be attracted to specific genitals. But it is transphobic to claim to not be attracted to all trans, people. For example, there is a difference between saying you won’t go out with someone for having a penis and saying you won’t go out with someone because they’re trans.
It’s similar to someone saying they aren’t attracted to all black people. So is it a preference? Or is it phobia/racism?
Incidentally, many, many transwomen are racist if held to this same definition. Couldn’t a transwoman’s lack of interest in black men – because of their skin color – or some other aspect of their physical disposition, something they can’t help bing, be interpeted the same way?
You better believe it.
“Oh, but THAT’S a preference,” some will say….Not according to many, many, many, many people. But not everyone. Some think it’s just prejudice. Others do think it’s a preference. So how is not wanting to be with a transwoman, even if a person is initially attracted to such a person, not a preference then? I think it depends on the story.
That’s Dusty Rose. And yes, she’s fine, period
After all, there are a LOT of black people, men too, who are loving, caring people. Just as there are probably similar such people among transwomen.
Here’s a great definition of racism: “people making negative assessments of large groups of individuals that they’ve never met, based solely on the color of their skin.” Replace “based solely on the color of their skin” with “based solely on their status outside the heteronormative binary”, and we start coming to some interesting parallels.
Suffice it to say this is an great example of why I wrote the post recently on why it’s so hard to be the “woke” police. Everyone has a picadillo or two. You’re bound to have yours exposed when you start exposing others. So it’s tough to call people racist or transphobic, especially in the grey areas. If a person is calling people racist slurs, or anti-trans slurs, or demeaning a person, or a group of people in either category on the basis of that alone, that’s one thing. But it gets really slippery when a person starts trying to parse out examples that could be just preference.
It’s far better – if you’re wanting to be happy – to leave all that shit to other people. It’s far better to create stories which create the best reality circumstances for your life and let other people live. If that means sometimes (in the early stages) meeting a dick, or a racist or a transphobe or two, so be it. In the end, those people won’t be able to find you….if you’re telling the right stories.
It was only a matter of time before medical advances made womb transplantation a possibility. This technology already has been pioneered in cisgender women. It becoming available to trans women was a foregone conclusion.
While it may be some time before it is perfected. I am certain it will be. After all, as I’ve said many times, All That Is seeks to express itself in as many varied ways as possible in its effort to explore its expansion and creativity. So no wonder some trans women would ask for, and receive technologies making it possible for them to birth children.
And, of course, there are souls waiting to come into the world in exactly this manner.
Prepare for a massive backlash of ethical and moral arguments, particularly from those trapped in perspectives which see only “man” and “woman”. Those words and concepts are increasingly being blown out of the water as All That Is exerts its true nature upon human narrow-mindedness: humanity, as everything else, is an expression of All That Is. That means there never was a hard distinction between the two genders….and that includes the two sexes. I would not be surprised, for example, for a gay male couple, in the future using this technology to “birth” a child between them.
Stranger things have and will happen.
And this is just the beginning. We are in momentous times. Expect the unexpected. But just know, everything is always working out. Even when you think it’s not.
It’s one of the many reasons why I frequently draw parallels between transgender equality and the civil rights movement of the 60s. There are so many common struggles, events, tactics and strategies being used in the transgender equality movement that almost identical to those used to bring civil rights to black people.
You may remember Sarah McBride. She made history by becoming the first transgender woman to address a major political party when she spoke at the Democratic National Convention. Her new memoir is called Tomorrow Will Be Different: Love, Loss, and the Fight for Trans Equality.
We also had a small cameo in her illustrious life, featuring her on our YouTube show this year.
I’m not surprised McBride got the Obama-era VP to write the forward for her memoir, just as I’m not surprised at the parallels between this modern-day civil rights issue and the one from the bygone era. I’m just happy to be doing my part with The Transamorous Network to make it possible for transgender people everywhere to get the rights they deserve.
Kudos Sarah. And thanks to Biden for recognizing the plight of transgender Americans.
The number of transgender people running for office recently has skyrocketed. That’s such wonderful news, because it more representation in our “lawmaking halls” will mean more legislation favorable toward transgender people.
Here’s an awesome perspective on this, which was excerpted from this report:
The reason behind this appears to be that simply knowing someone who is LGBTQ makes people more likely to support LGBTQ rights.
“Being visible and present continues to change hearts and minds, and humanize us and our issues,” Aisha C. Moodie-Mills, President and CEO of the Victory Fund, told NBC OUT.
According to Reynolds, “When LGBTQ people come out, they become your daughter, uncle, friend, work colleague. They become humanized, normalized. We know that the number of people who support marriage equality tracks the number of people who say they know someone who is gay.”
Check out this great graph. It shows the increasing number of transgender people running for office and the number elected. These data are from 2015. They don’t include this year or last. What this tells me is, the future is bright. Very bright. That’s cause to celebrate.
Now, if you frequent our content, you know that focusing on news like this, creates more awareness of similar news. As you focus on more of that kind of news, you feel better. As you feel better (whether you believe it or not) you are creating by virtue of feeling better, more experiences of connecting with more similar kinds of news. That means you create more of this kind of progress in physical reality.
If instead you focus on news that is depressing, negative, and disempowering, the same holds true. You feel worse. As you feel worse you are creating through your negative feelings more experiences of connection with similar kinds of news. That means you create more of this kind of (negative) progress in your physical reality.
And this is where your freedom comes in: you are free to create whatever “reality” you want to experience. The choice it completely yours. So why not create what you want, instead of what you don’t?
It’s an interesting question. This 
It was only a matter of time before medical advances made 
