Proof It Works - The Transamorous Network

July 21, 2020July 21, 2020

Why I must match my ideal transgender partner

2X1 2 — Photo by JOSHUA COLEMAN on Unsplash

I have high standards. Some standards I hold even I don’t meet…yet.

I’m heading in that direction though.

These standards I also call my ideal stories. I have ideal stories about me, about life, about partners, that create my reality. I know, for example, that I am moving into greater financial abundance. I know abundance is more than financial or material, and so I already see evidence of “abundance” surrounding me already.

I am surrounded by beauty. That’s another story. I see beauty everywhere. Every morning I’m astounded by the beauty that is where I live. When the sun shines through my windows, it plays beautifully with shadows creating visual feasts for my eyes.

I know there are successful, independent, smart and beautiful trans women coming my way. This are my ideal stories too. These women (and yes, there are more than one) are all interested I me for what I represent to them. And so they find me as I find them: a perfect match.

I know I have created a life in beautiful California, my birth state. That’s another ideal story. I know I’m returning there with ease, grace and with so much financial abundance I can live in that state anywhere I choose.

And I know my days are filled with fun and play, with my clients, with my companies and with people working with me to influence better into the world.

These are some of my ideal stories.

Evidence abounds if you know how to see it

Some would say, “well where’s the evidence your stories are creating the reality you claim?”

My answer is, evidence abounds. But unless the person knows where to look and how to look, they can’t see the evidence. It also takes a while because, physical reality isn’t a magical reality. Things take time to turn from one thing to another. So evidence of my ideal stories “coming true” includes seeing old stories fading away.

Evidence combines old story evidence fading and ideal story evidence showing up.

For example, though I haven’t sought them out, I now am social media friends with quite successful trans women. I wrote before about transgender women I’ve met recently who are military company commanders, business owners and radio personalities. Recently, I’ve had the pleasure of interacting with financially successful, smart, witty trans women entrepreneurs from Europe and the United States too.

I know these conversations, these acquaintances evidence me moving towards high standards I have about life, my own prosperity and what I want in a partner. I also know tipping point is coming. I both feel it and see it.

I know soon my life experience will 100 percent match my ideal stories. The more my current life transforms to that, the more high-quality, beautiful, smart and successful trans women will show up.

In other words, I’m seeing results showing what I’m doing pays off. And I’m eager for more evidence. I’m not addicted to the final outcome though. Nor am I concerned about proving anything to anyone. I know, in time, evidence will be so great others will know it too.

2X1 3 — Everyone deserves love in their life. Ideal love shows up when individuals match what they think is ideal. (Photo by JOSHUA COLEMAN on Unsplash)

Everyone deserves lives they love

Humans are supposed to have lives they love. I know this. I also know the trouble plaguing most humans is, they aren’t willing to allow the Universe to deliver lives they love. Instead, they try making that life happen through action, especially in romance.

Dating sites make tons of money off people trying to do what the Universe is doing for them, so they get in the way, blocking a natural process. I encourage my clients away from dating sites for several reasons. The biggest reason is, it’s more fun meeting one’s ideal match by first becoming a match to one’s ideal stories.

Every relationship someone gets into is a match to that person at the time. Knowing this, I prefer waiting until I become a match to my ideal partner so that my relationships are relationships with that kind of person instead of, say, someone who matches where I am right now.

Where I am right now isn’t bad. But I know where I’m going is going to be way better. So I’m willing to wait. In the meantime, trans women I meet are getting better and better in both quality and quantity, matching all the other changes indicating progress toward my high standards.

In the meantime, I’m happy being with myself, improving my stories, then watching as the world I create transforms to match my ideal stories, stories which will unequivocally create the life of my dreams.

Being happy, I don’t need patience. I don’t need proof because I see it everywhere. That’s why I’m not impatient. It’s a great place to be, seeing the world of my dreams emerge from my world right now, even while some people struggle against the world of what is.

The trans women I’m meeting are evidence, yes. But so is everything else. My life is great. I love what I’m becoming. I love who I am. I love what I have. I’m becoming a match to my ideal partner and so my ideal partner is coming to me.

May 26, 2020May 26, 2020

How to differentiate between trans-attraction and transamory

We get a lot of letters and comments at The Transamorous Network. So far, though, nothing like this…

Last week Jim Venturini contacted us. He’s followed us for many years, but recently accepted wholeheartedly his transamory. He contacted us not only to tell his success story, he also wants to reach others like him, who struggle, as he once had, with trans-attraction.

That’s the difference between a trans-attracted man and a transamorous one. Trans-attracted men can be nearly anywhere along the journey. The Transamorous man is in one place and one place only: not only do they love trans women, love them openly and see them for all of who and what they are, they’re also out loud supporters.

But they’re not just supporters of trans woman. They’re also supporters of trans-attracted men. They’ve been there, they know what it’s like. They recognize how hard it was and want to help other men have it better. They recognize how they too once fetishized trans women and want to help stop that.

It’s cool hearing Jim’s story. Rather than us telling it, here’s Jim telling it in his own words via a IM session he had with us. See if you can tell the difference.

Whether you’re trans-attracted and feeling shame and embarrassment, there are lots of men like you out there feeling the same way. Not only are you not alone, YOU DON’T HAVE TO FEEL THAT WAY. We can help you embrace all you are then become successful at finding your partner.

If you’re a trans woman and thinking after reading this that Jim is a unicorn, think again. Not only are there tens of thousands (and more!) of men like him out there, the biggest thing to know is, you don’t need that many! You just have desire for one, likely. You can have the love you want. Telling the right stories is where it starts. We can help you too!

May 12, 2020

Transgender woman gets her wishes

This transgender woman who lives in rural America got her dream job, a ton of boys and more…it’s all so fun…and with little effort on her part, she says. Hear it in her own (unscripted) words.

At The Transamorous Network, we work with our clients so they get the love they want, the jobs they want, the love they want. But the most important thing we do with our clients is show them how to find and maintain joyful lives. That comes from telling the right stories. And when a person does that, no barrier stands between the person and their desiress.

We guarantee you’ll find the love of your life. Where you live, what you look like, what you are, doesn’t matter. We guarantee it because we know it works. So do our clients, such as “Joslin” here. Want that dream girl or guy? Get your stories right. We’ll show you how.

March 30, 2020

How I created $10,000

Untitled_Artwork 5

Life is delightful.

Last month, in cahoots with Inner Being, I realized $10,000 in project funding. Rendezvousing with those funds came surprisingly and delightfully, which is how “right timing” always feels.

Right timing happens when I tell the right stories about what I want consistently enough that my reality matches stories I tell. This works with creating money, apartments, partners, or even intangibles such as happiness, well being and freedom. Here’s how to do it:

• • •

Between jobs last month and with COVID-19 shutting down job opportunities, I slowed down looking for work. In that space, I realized what I wanted more than a job paying the bills, was my projects paying the bills.

But current stories about my projects funding my living created ongoing nows consistent with those stories. That’s why I needed work. I didn’t believe my projects could pay my bills.

So that’s the reality I got.

Earlier last month though, I decided I would allow current stories a path out of my awareness. Doing that, I knew they would no longer influence my reality. Do that long enough, I knew, and stories consistent with my desires would become my reality.

That’s what I started two weeks ago. On Day one, determination reigned. By Day 12, old stories re-asserted themselves. All stories, beliefs or thoughts enjoy leaning toward their fullest expression. Believe it or not, stories are living things as all thoughts are. They revel in expression.

Once in my head, it can be hard getting them out. Unless I know what to do, that is, which I do, so it’s not hard. It’s easy.

The withdraw

My old stories reveled in my then present reality. The more I looked for work, the stronger their momentum. Their revelry felt like pressure, fear and anxiety inside me. That’s because their revelry in me drew to me thoughts like these:

I gotta get a job. My savings is running out
I should take whatever I can get
If I don’t take this job, there may not be others

Sense scarcity consciousness in those?

But then I reminded myself that I create my reality. Not these stories. I can choose stories I tell. I’ll choose stories that feel good and know by my good feelings, realities consistent with my positive stories will become my reality.

Thoughts that feel good sounded like this:

I don’t need to take any of these jobs I feel “blah” about
There are plenty of jobs available for me
My Inner Being knows the best job for me
I’ll wait for that best job

But then, while thinking those thoughts, other more positive thoughts came to me:

I don’t want a job!
I really enjoy working on my projects
Why can’t my projects support my living?
They can!
I want that reality!
Working on my projects full time feels fun!

That was around Day six. Between Day six and Day 12, old story constellations reasserted themselves several times each day. They (those thoughts) would pop into my head from time to time vying with my new, emerging stories. This is how it goes. It’s what changing your reality looks like.

Thankfully, I trained myself into monitoring my feelings. Any time I felt bad, I knew old stories popped up, even if I didn’t know what stories I told at that time.

Sometimes I knew. I felt and heard the thought. Other times, I didn’t.

No matter. Anytime I felt negative emotion, I pulled my attention back into the now, then focused on the positive thought-set. Something interesting: Negative emotion usually came when I let my attention slip into the future. That’s a no-no because when there I easily slip into trying to figure out the “how” and the “when” about what I want: How will my projects sustain me? When will that happen? Will it happen before I run out of money?

Those thoughts create fear and worry. So I know they don’t lean toward my desired reality that’s becoming my now. Instead, they lean the other way.

Any time I couldn’t shift my thinking because old story momentum had too much strength, I would take a nap, or go do something I enjoy: watch a favorite movie, or go on a walk.

By Day 14, I had done a lot of all that. I felt really good.

The morning of Day 14, I had wonderful dreams and epiphanies I wrote about in my journal. Then, one of my Positively Focused clients sent a message on WhatsApp. He’s not only a client, he’s keen about Copiosis, my other project. He’s given money to that organization before.

It just so happened, I launched a Copiosis social media advertising strategy earlier that week. So I had plenty to show him. The progress excited him. In his excitement he told he would give me more money to run that organization. Then he said use the rest of his gift to fund my living expenses so I could work full time on my projects.

How much was “the rest”? Nine thousand, five hundred and eighty dollars! I walked right into my desired reality!

Here’s the thing about all this. The money is great. Now I don’t need a job. It will fund my living expenses for most of the rest of the year. More money is coming, I’m sure.

But what’s more thrilling is what I experienced on the way to this money. The deliberate focus. Telling the right stories. Clarity coming from that. Positive, wonderful, ecstatic feelings coming from clarity.

Every moment I stayed in the present moment, I enjoyed throughly. In other words, most of that time I was happy. I’m happy still.

Those times I didn’t I stay in the Moment of Becoming, I see as beneficial too. Without them, I wouldn’t know I was heading away from what I wanted. So even those times benefitted me.

Getting the $10K is great. But desire fulfillment lasts hardly as long as anticipation, the joyful expectations, the pleasure that is knowing desire fulfillment is on its way. Seeing the signs as I move toward desire fulfillment sweetens the journey.

Since I’m eternal, new desires will always spring up. So I’ll always be on the way to a new desire.

How does all this relate to finding a partner? Your reality springs from stories you’re telling. Old story momentum creates your reality just as my old story momentum created my “I need a job” reality. Change your stories and in a little while, you’ll find yourself in new realities. Realities filled with abundant relationship options, no matter how unlikely you think your relationship options are.

Life gets mostly lived on a journey towards someplace. Every time I arrive, arrival births new desires. Which is why I know this: Life is about the journey. Not the destination. Settle into that truth. Not only will you have more fun, you’ll get what you want fast.

March 16, 2020March 16, 2020

How to keep your heart from breaking

No_More_Broken_Hearts — Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash

What is a broken heart? A broken heart is a mindset.

Society romanticizes broken hearts. Movies get made. Songs get sung. Getting hurt happens, right?

Not necessarily.

No one need ever experience a broken heart. Put your heart in the right place. It will never break again.

My recent relationship taught me that. 😂👍🏾❤️

· · ·

Lauren and I got acquainted when she contacted me online.

Mutual affection grew fast, as we had a lot in common. She’s trans. I’m Transamorous. We both shared art, love of music, philosophy, food and more.

But as intimacy grew, she got more nervous. The closer we got, the more uncomfortable she got.

I relish love. I relish love because I am love. Connected to my Inner Being, expressing unconditional love flows like breathing. So, naturally, I shared spontaneous appreciation for Lauren. I appreciated Lauren’s existence, her talent, and her strengths, especially strengths she developed as she’s accepted being trans.

For a while she appreciated all that.

Then it got too much for her.

Relationships are nice-to-haves

I know if I’m patient, the Universe will show me everything I want. It will also show me reasons why I may not want what I have.

As my Broader Perspective connection strengthens, I desire human affection less. Connection to Broader Perspective showers me with an incredible, unconditional love. A love so deep and satisfying, relationships with other people get put in their proper place: as nice-to-haves, not as must haves.

There’s no forlornness when I’m not in a relationship because my Inner Being relationship dominates. It (my Inner Being) always floods me, its love so strong and overflowing and present, I never feel alone. I feel loved.

So I never feel yearning or that I’m missing out on love. My Broader Perspective’s unconditional love is enough. As it pores through me, I become that. Pure love.

So why seek relationships with people when I become that which people crave from relationships?

Good question.

Thoughts make reality

My perspectives on human relationships changed since discovering my Inner Being. I yearned for them before. I felt incomplete without one. But yearning creates problems. In yearning I sow seeds of loss. Here’s how that works

When I yearn for something, then get it, I fear I’m going to lose that for which I’ve yearned. Holding tight to what I’ve got for fear of losing it guarantees I will lose it. Holding something tight like that emphasizes its loss. Reality springs from thoughts.

Tightness in my body born of fear is reality. Physical sensations are real, right? So my thoughts about losing someone creates an incipient reality: a feeling. In this case “tightness”.

In that reality, my behavior reflects my fear. I say things consistent with fear. I interpret what I see from fear. I may even start checking out relationship options. I hedge my bets.

Meanwhile my partner knows what’s up. They may not know it in their awareness, yet they still know. That’s why a partner might check your phone or email. A hunch will push through into their awareness. There are no secrets. We’re all one.

Unchecked, my fear creates even more real, realities. This is called momentum. My partner may find my bet hedging, then get insecure. Before long tension grows. Fights happen. Mistrust grows. They might start bet-hedging. Then the breakup comes.

Untitled_Artwork 4 — Reality springs from Inner Reality. It starts with thoughts, which draw themselves to perceivers “tuned in” to those thought frequencies. The rest happens automatically so long as perceivers stay tuned in. So reality perpetuates, thus creating eternity.

Thoughts come from somewhere

Inner reality is real. Where do you think thoughts come from? Thought is a physical reality.

Thoughts drive perception. Perception is reality too. Perception then drives behaviors. Behaviors are reality. Behaviors influence others and their behavior. Others cooperate with me helping create my reality. They act consistent with my thoughts.

So behaviors always match Inner Reality. Since reality springs from behavior, and behavior springs from perception, and perception springs from thoughts and thoughts come from Inner Reality, then my Inner Reality must become one’s physical reality starting with my thoughts.

That’s how it works.

I know how to create realities I want. My emotions guide me. The better I feel, the more I know my becoming reality includes my fulfilled desires. That’s because positive thoughts must become positive realities.

Strong connection with my Inner Being short circuits yearning, fear and insecurity, replacing them with appreciation and love. My job: staying there as best I can. I don’t always. But doing that consistent enough creates realities consistent with appreciation and love.

So if a partner chooses something other than a relationship with me, I see the former relationship in its proper perspective: a nice-to-have. Not so significant that I create realities consistent with painful loss. Were I to do that, I would experience a broken heart. For a broken heart is a physical reality (an emotion) triggered by thoughts consistent with “broken heart realities”.

No_More_Broken_Hearts 4 — Even when you’re alone, you’re not. Love literally surrounds and moves through and in and out of you. (Photo by Greg Rakozy on Unsplash)

Love happens best when alone

Human love can’t match Inner Being unconditional love. Moreover, another person can’t match all that my Inner Being gives me in its love for me. It literally gives me everything I want in wonderful, surprising ways and in perfect timing. I write about these on my other blog Positively Focused.

Human relationships always come up short compared to that. That doesn’t make human relationships bad. They are what they are.

Love doesn’t come from another person. Love happens when, while with a person, I tune into thoughts that connect me with my Inner Being. It’s my Inner Being connection that triggers love. Not being in relationship. Which means, I can feel love outside relationship.

This puts relationships in a less triggering perspective. I conjure love at will. So if a relationship ends, it’s not the end of my love, or my world. And my heart breaks no more.

Untitled_Artwork 5 — You’ll find no more broken hearts when you re-discover your relationship with you.

So when Lauren called distraught and in crisis about our relationship, I took it in stride. Despite all we had in common, despite being with someone who loved her, she focused on things she thought we didn’t share. Real things for her. Perception is reality. Her perception saw broken hearts in our future. That scared her.

She said long distance relationships were something she didn’t do. Yet, she was doing one.
She said I put too many expectations on her. I put no expectations on her. I only wanted to love her.
She said me telling her I loved her filled her with anxiety. A strange connection I thought, feeling anxiety when someone loves you.
She said our relationship would fail.

I found it strange that the more I showered her with love the less she enjoyed us. I found it strange until she told me how people in her past said they loved her, but their behavior said otherwise. She doesn’t know that thoughts create reality. She doesn’t know other people act out what you’re thinking. They do that so your thoughts are “made real” for your examination. They’re made real so you can do something about them.

For me our relationship already succeeded and had no other choice but to succeed going forward. Where she saw “red flags”, I saw adventure and opportunity.

As I said, when one gets connected to one’s Inner Being, it will show that person why they may not want what they have. In her objections, Lauren showed me why Lauren may not be something I want. She wasn’t consistent with my “love vibration”. So she took herself out of my reality, leaving me free to love and be loved.

For me, relationship success looks like a relationship through which two parties are better off because of it. That means two find greater harmony with their Inner Beings by experiencing life with one another.

That’s what happened for me. And so where is the case for failure, or a broken heart?

It’s easy to never have a broken heart again. It starts with prioritizing the one relationship that will never end, the one relationship through which I get everything I want, no matter what that is, and then some. That’s the relationship between me and me.

Standing there, I never lose love. Or anything else. It’s all gain. And my heart remains whole.