Those angry about increasing visibility of transgender people need to “get over it.”
Those aren’t my words. Although I agree with them. They are Robin Hammond’s Words. Who’s Robin Hammond? He’s the guy who took the National Geographic cover photo of transgender girl Avery Jackson. Though the issue hasn’t been published yet, National Geographic is being both hailed and hated for it.
It’s just another step in the eventual full embrace of transgender people worldwide.
I’ve seen a lot of responses to this photo. Which is beautiful by the way. Avery’s quote is so perfect. Since we focus on positive aspects the Transamorous Network, I’m not going to recount negative comments people and organizations have made about it. Instead, I’m going to quote Hammond’s reaction to them, which I think is gold:
“[Some people are] likely scared of change,” He said. “They saw a world where [being trans] didn’t exist and now they see it as a new thing. It’s sad for them because it leaves them closed off to people who are different to them.”
“The best thing about being a girl is now I don’t have to pretend to be a boy.”
– Avery Jackson
If you’re interested in reading more about Hammond and his remarks, you can read this article. Here’s National Geographic’s explanation for their exceptional cover.
First, there are no “problems”. Since you probably, like most people, believe there are, we need to unpack that. I’ll get back to the fact that there are no problems in a moment.
Having trouble finding love? Having trouble finding work? Tired of all those “crazy” transwomen you keep meeting; the gold-diggers, players, skeezers, cheaters? Tired of all the chasers, the guys who are in the closet, guys that want you to “top” them? Are you tired of hearing about people like you getting beaten and killed? Are you one of those people whose parents want nothing to do with you?
There’s a way out of all that. But first, you have to really look at where all these problems are coming from. I mean really look. If any of the problems above (or any other problem) is your experience, and that experience has you feeling sucky, there’s something you can do to relieve yourself of them. Yes, “them”, meaning, all of them. But it’s going to take some time and it’s going to take some work. The first task: understand the one thing all your problems share.
That thing is YOU.
There is no way to deny that you are the common denominator of all your problems. The plain fact is, if you weren’t here, you wouldn’t be experiencing your problems. If you didn’t exist, your problems – at least as you’re experiencing them – wouldn’t exist because your experience wouldn’t exist. Right?
Seems obvious, right?
This is so eye-rolling obvious, but I would bet, dear reader, that you haven’t stopped to think about how that obvious fact plays into your problem-experience. That you are the center of all your problems is why you are always meeting the same guys or girls in your search for love. It’s why you’re having a hard time finding that job you like. It’s why you’re stuck feeling like being trans is so hard.
If you didn’t exist, neither would your problems.
Since you are the common denominator of all your problems, doesn’t it stand to reason
No denying it honey. You’re the problem.
that the solution to these problems isn’t “out there” in your “reality”, it’s somehow “in there” in side “you”? There’s an old saying: when you point a finger in blame, there are three fingers pointing back at you. Your problems aren’t the problem. You are.
This is not some “positive self-help” meme. It’s basic reality. This also is the fundamental truth about our work here. We want you to have a fabulously fun, happy and exciting life where you experience all you want and NONE OF WHAT YOU DON’T WANT. You can’t have that life though if you’re blaming your reality for all the problems you see in it. Because the more you point the finger at your reality, the more problems you sow in that reality. The way out of your problems is to realize there are no problems.
And that is no Matrix movie bullshit. It is the most accurate statement about your world.
Now you and your friends might be like “this is such bullshit, you’re blaming the victim.” We actually had a person write us recently on our YouTube channel and make that claim. The problem with that statement is, it denies the common denominator of the problem. If the victim didn’t exist, there’d be no experience.
So the question then is, how do I (that’s you) have experiences that don’t look like problems?
There are no problems. Only clues.
First, what you think of are problems aren’t. What they are are clues showing you that you have your interpretation of your life experience all screwy. You are getting clues all the time, but you don’t usually pay attention to them, so the clues get bigger and bigger until they’re undeniable. Problem (lol) is you don’t see them as clues, you see them as problems. So instead of taking the clue, you look at it and complain about it. It’s like the pointing finger. It’s a simple clue, a symbol, indicating to every human being with hands that when you look out in the world and blame something out there, there is more evidence (three fingers as opposed to one) that the Source of the problem is the person pointing the finger.
Clues you interpret as problems get bigger and bigger until you do something about them. The biggest thing you can “do” to “get the clue” is to look at the stories you’re telling yourself. Your stories are creating your life experience. The more persistent stories have more dominance in your reality-creation. So if you’re complaining all the time that the only transwomen you meet are trifling, that story is going to predominate meaning your life experience is going to only allow you to meet trifling transwomen. Your meeting trifling transwomen, and your disappointment about that repeat experience, is your clue that you have a story creating something you’re not wanting.
If you want a happy life, you have to tell happy stories about your life. But don’t expect miracles to happen over night, although it can happen that way. Old stories take time to subside. New ones take time to settle in. But the good news is, you are always able to change your stories at any time. Which means you are always able to start changing your life experience at any time too.
On Monday we’re launching our newest show. It’s about you, your deepest desires and how to have them become your reality. It’s called IN YOUR FACE and you can only watch it on Facebook.
We know you want pretty much what everyone else does. You want love in your life. It can be expressed many different ways. But love is a BIG desire in everyone’s life. You want to be loved, which in this case means accepted. Whether that’s a family, or a network of friends or a group of people who accepts you as you. You want fulfilling and meaningful things to invest your time into. Whether that’s a job or a hobby, a vocation or something you pursue for fun, you want to contribute to this world in a way that reflects the unique aspects of you. And you want money. Yes, it’s the nature of our world right now that money makes a lot of things possible. So we all want it. Many of us want a lot of it.
Men, you want a transgender partner you can call your own, on your own terms. You’re
There a lot of things people who will watch our new show don’t want too. These are reflections of what you do want. You don’t want skeezer men chasing you. You don’t want men who won’t introduce you to their friends. You don’t want to keep working in the sex industry just to afford hormone treatments. Men don’t want to be humiliated for their desire. They don’t want to be told they’re gay because of their attraction. Et cetera. Et cetera.
For all these reasons, the Transamorous Network introduces our newest show: IN YOUR FACE. Join us for a conversation about you, your deepest desires and our transgender community. We’ll be taking your questions and answering them live.
It’s IN YOUR FACE. Only on Facebook Live. IN YOUR FACE begins Monday, December 12 at 7:30 p.m. Pacific.
Information contained in this survey is not in your best interest.
If you’re transgender and wanting an empowered, happy life, if you’re wanting to change your life for the better, then pay no attention to this survey published today. I included a link, but suggest you not go read it.
If you’re not happy with “what is” in your life, you’re better off not paying attention to news about this survey or the survey results. There’s a lot of negative information in the survey, information confirming what is in “the transgender community”.
But the “transgender community” is not “your life”. Your life is an overwhelming flow of great things happening, things which indicate life is getting better and better for you. Focus on stories about those things and I guarantee your life will look nothing like the lives of people responding to this survey. Focusing stories in those survey data instead of the great things in your life, will blind you to the greatness in your life, the things you want more of, and give you more of what you’re not wanting. You’ll become a statistic in this survey.
So tell stories of what you’re wanting. Wanting a partner and don’t have one? Tell the story of how good it will feel to have a partner. In an unfortunate economic circumstances and wanting more money? Tell the story of how great it will feel to have more money. Homeless and want a place to live? Tell the story about how sleeping in your own bed will be such a relief. Unemployed and wanting work? Tell the story of doing something you love and earning income from that. Then feel the positive emotions of those stories.
You’re far better off focusing on anything other than this survey. Is the weather good where you live? Got a favorite movie or food? Got a pet you adore? Turn off the internet. Watch Nashville.
The survey results aren’t going to make you feel good. Feeling not-good is not in your best interest. Not while you’re unaware of what your feelings are telling you. I know, nearly everyone else is saying exactly the opposite. They are saying you should know this information because there are people suffering. They are saying more attention paid to these statistics will make a difference. But your circumstances won’t change because of this survey or the stories in it.
Only you can change your circumstances. Stories about struggle, pain and fear, disadvantage, poverty and violence DOES NOT serve you. It doesn’t matter what other transpeople are doing. It doesn’t matter what people are doing to those people. It only matters what stories you tell yourself.
Tell stories about the getting better in your life. And the rest of your life will follow suit.
Those angry about increasing visibility of transgender people need to “get over it.”
First, there are no “problems”. Since you probably, like most people, believe there are, we need to unpack that. I’ll get back to the fact that there are no problems in a moment.
On Monday we’re launching our newest show. It’s about you, your deepest desires and how to have them become your reality. It’s called IN YOUR FACE and you can only watch it on 
