Why Triggers words trigger

Trigger WordsThere is nothing in your life more important than allowing your joy to flow. When you are connected with that flowing positive emotion, you not only feel better, your entire life literally shifts to align with that positive feeling.  Don’t believe what you’re reading. Try it in your life and see for yourself. Use our Guides to assist. You’ll soon see how miraculous living your life this way is. While it’s not easy at first, consistently living from that place, the more you can, the better your life gets. The better your life gets, the closer you come to realizing your dreams, including your ideal partner. As more of your life goes the way that pleases you, it gets easier as proof is powerful reinforcement.

Whether you’re a transamorous man, or a transperson, your joy is your access to all you desire. Including freeing yourself from being triggered by anything or anyone.

Now, we talk a lot about knee-jerk reactions in our Guides. Most people’s knee-jerk reactions create their reality.  They don’t know what is happening, nor do they have the information you’re reading, so they don’t know where their future comes from. In a knee-jerk reaction, a person experiences an event and the event (based on past experience) triggers an emotional response. In knee-jerk reactions, the human being is literally asleep at the switch: they have given up their choose-ability, allowing their life experience to run on a kind of automatic pilot.

Most people live most of their life moments in this mode, instead of a consciously-creative mode, where they are consciously creating their future aligned with what they want and as a result living lives happily ever after.

The more intense the emotional reaction, the more oomph is infused into the creation process whether the triggered emotion is positive or negative. It’s easier for positive emotions to bring positive results than it is for negative ones to bring negative results because the universe is pre-disposed for creating positive outcomes. That said, even if you’re not wanting whatever is happening, if you’re focused on it, and having a negative emotional response to it, you’re infusing your future with more of that thing you don’t want.  The more times you focus on that thing, the more “regular” the knee-jerk pattern becomes, to the point it becomes automatic: You have an experience that reminds you of the past. Instantly, you’re having an emotional reaction and that experience determines your future. Over the course of many experiences, the past becomes irrelevant: you just have emotional reactions to events which appear (even in the slightest) familiar.


Whether you’re a transamorous man, or a transperson, your joy is your access to all you desire. Including freeing yourself from being triggered by anything or anyone.


Trigger words are an external “event” which you have created through your unconscious living as a way to make you conscious again and as a result find more joy and empowerment.  How’s that for a new way of seeing things?  The purpose of trigger words is to let you know something needs attention. You put them in your life. When someone clocks you, and you feel ashamed, exposed, angry or humiliated, those strong emotions are an indicator that you have unfinished business regarding how you think and feel about who and what you are. The person who utters the trigger word is your ally in the process. When you are unconscious, you don’t realize this.

Someone calling you “sir”, calling you a man or using the wrong gender pronouns is a huge opportunity you have put along your path. Used as the positive experience you meant them to be, they become springboards to greater empowerment, freedom and joy. When you react with intense negative emotion, however, you squander the opportunity…for now. For if you do react negatively, instantly, a new opportunity is “put” in your “future”. So you can have another go at it. The great thing about trigger words and the seemingly endless stream of such events “apparent” in your future is, sooner or later, you’re going to figure it out that these events are meant to empower you, not disempower you.

You create your reality.

If you’re a transamorous man trying to find a transwoman, triggers can look different. They serve the same function though. If you’re living your life in secret, afraid of what people might say if you’re found out, that fear, shame and self-reproach are triggered responses to the life you’re living. In your case, the trigger word is really a trigger life: a life lived in secret.  Your emotional response to that secret life is a clue you’ve put into your reality. Shame, fear, self-reproach are indicators saying, “there’s something you need to address, the addressing of which will increase your freedom and joy.” Literally.  For the moment you stop allowing your external reality to dictate how you live and feel, you become more free to be who you are.  And in that greater freedom, you will encounter all manner of transwomen as there will be no discord between what you are and what you want and what the universe is showing you.  In the meantime, your negative emotions: shame, embarrassment, self-reproach, are creating a reality wherein you’re invisible to the transwomen who are looking for guys like you. This is one of the many reasons why it seems to you that quality transwomen are hard to find. They are hard to find when you’re not allowing the universe to put you in places where they are because you’re resisting your desire with all these negative emotions and creating future realities where you’re alone with your natural desire and your shame for having that desire.

Living from a joyful place ultimately means caring so much about how you feel that you’re not willing to allow knee-jerk reactions to happen.  Being able to live from a joyful place first requires that you understand that you are creating your reality ongoingly. Then it takes some practice. It’s not easy, but you can live a life where you’re no longer being triggered by something that happens to you, particularly what another person does or what another person says. When you’re living your life from that place, oh how beautiful life becomes…

If your life is not all you want it to be, come to peace with where you’re at. If you’re triggered because your mom continues to call you her son, or if you’re in a constantly triggered state of shame, fearful someone might call you fag because you want to be with a transwoman, that is where you’re at. You have to start where you’re at. Trying too hard to be where you’re not only creates more resistance. Instead, start by observing what happens when you’re triggered. Stop talking to your friends about the last time someone clocked you. Stop listening to others talk about their similar negative experiences. Soften your reactions and discover the infinite alternative ways you can respond to these beneficial, purposely-intended events. That is your access to the joyful life experience you intended when you chose to come here.

It doesn’t get any better than this

IMG_0006When you realize you are the creator of your life, as well as the person through which your life is “made”, you come to find, watching how your life gradually shifts to match your desires, that there is nothing you can’t do. Nothing you can’t be. Nothing you can’t have.

How cool is that?

Because we know we create our reality, we are living an adventurous life, tackling adventurous goals. One of those goals is creating a new system were everyone’s needs (food, clothing, shelter, education and healthcare) are provided to all at no cost. We started this project with an intention (our story), a focused desire to make it happen. When the idea came, we were thrilled with it (the first evidence of physical reality matching our desire). From there we began listening to our inner being for clues on what action to take, taking only that action that felt inspired.

That was three years ago. Today, we have a world-wide movement. Thousands of people around the world (on nearly every continent except South America, Africa, and the poles) are working to make the idea a reality. In two weeks we’ll be on the radio (for the third time) being interviewed about the work. We’ve been flown to Greece to give a speech about the work, we even have people giving us money to make sure the work happens. The number of people giving us money has quadrupled in the last six months. And this is just the beginning.

There is nothing you can’t have. You can have anything you want in your life. It’s your life! Life is supposed to be fun. You are supposed to live a happy life where all your dreams are fulfilled. If you’re a Transamorous Man and you live your desire for a Transgender partner in the shadows of gay bars or in back alleys or hotel rooms or Craigslist, you’re doing your desire a disservice. Why are you doing that? What do you fear? You create your reality. The only thing you have to fear is the stories that cause you to feel fear because they are creating your reality. Change those stories, then take inspired action and your life experience will shift. You will meet wonderful transpeople, in the open. People won’t care about your choices in a partner and you can get on with living your life in full.

If you’re a Transwoman and you’re wanting a man to love you for you, you can have that. Perhaps your stories have you looking for love in the wrong places. Perhaps your stories have you creating rendezvous with men who suck (and not in the good way) or no men at all. Perhaps you felt you had to choose a woman because you believe (the story) that you won’t find a man who will love you for who you are. Change your stories and your life will change as will your opportunities.

When you realize no one can intrude into your life experience unless you allow them to (through your thoughts, your focus), when you realize every experience you have is a result of the thoughts you think, once you get over the resistance to those facts, you become truly invincible, impervious to negative outcomes. It doesn’t get any better than that! Well it does, but, you know what we’re saying.

Some my argue “well no one would intentionally creates negative situations in their life. That’s crazy.” And we say, oh? Is it so crazy to create negative situations when those situations, over time, become the spring board, the focusing mechanism of something better? What if those negative situations sharpen that person’s understanding of what they really want? Are those situations then really negative?

There is life to live. Joyful, pleasurable, wish-fulfilled life to live. All you have to do is see the world and yourself differently. Then live it from that place. We can help

Find joy in your self-acceptance

Live your life in joyWhether you’re in the closet or not, trans, transamorous or just know someone who is, the Transamorous Network’s first product offering can literally save a life (although that’s not why I created it). The Man’s Guide to Finding Your Transgender Partner,  published just this week, is a tested and validated approach for not only your personal happiness, but for finding lasting love as a transamorous guy.

I’ve created the guide based on my personal experience wading through my own feelings, then successfully coming to acceptance and love of those feelings, then believing in myself (and my transamory) enough to act on them. The process I outline in this guide not only will connect you with the transperson of your desires (guaranteed), it will also help you find peace with who you are as a transamorous person.

Skies the limit from there.

The guide offers background on the important role transamorous men play in the unfolding of human society and why now is YOUR TIME to stand up and own who you are. It then offers step-by-step instructions using a unique time-tested and proven approach for creating a life of greatest happiness, a life which includes living with the transgender partner you’ve been looking for.

Interestingly, the Man’s Guide helps transwomen find their partner too, although it wasn’t created for that purpose. I’m working on a separate guide for that.

At almost 150 pages, the guide goes into great detail guiding you on a path specifically designed for you to step into your authentic being. Interestingly, it’s approach also addresses many complaints transwomen have about us. So it is an excellent guide for transwomen to buy and share with their potential partners.

A workbook with four worksheets accompanies the guide (at a small extra cost). Use it to clarify your desires, and the powerful stories you have created which shape every experience in your life, including your experiences with transwomen. These stories, the stories about you, about transwomen and more, are the biggest thing determining whether you will end up meeting your transgender partner, or miss her entirely.

In the guide:

  • I explain why it’s so difficult to find transgender women in your area – if you’re having trouble
  • If you’re not happy with the transwomen you’re finding, I explain that too
  • I explain why you are your own worst enemy in finding your transgender partner
  • I show you the step by step process you can use to have the transpartner of your dreams…guaranteed

It doesn’t matter if you’re in the closet and single, in the closet and married, or out proud and looking, the Man’s Guide to Finding Your Transgender Partner can work for you.

I’m looking forward to sharing this gem with men like me who strongly desire a romantic relationship with a transgender partner, but are having difficulty finding that special person. Or the transamorous man who is in a relationship and facing difficulties. There’s no reason any more to stew in frustration, act out of your insecurities, or wonder why you just can’t find The One. This guide will show you how to claim your manhood, live your life in joy, and in so doing transform the world for transwomen everywhere.

Find out more here.