Category: News

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Life’s gonna suck under Trump. Or is it?

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What’s happening here?

I know. Pretty much everyone in the LGBT community hates Trump. Except maybe Caitlyn Jenner. While the rest of us worry about the terrible things his administration is going to do to the transgender community, let’s look at some of the real-world things happening that are making being transgender in America better.

BTW, we at The Transamorous Network are no fans of Trump or any other president. We can do far better without a president. Or a government. But that’s another story. Let’s instead look at some of the great things happening, many of which are because Trump is in office.

  • More than twenty 20 transgender people are now running for various government seats. These people are running for everything from city mayor to US Congress.
  • Gov. Christie, a republican, recently signed several pieces of legislation protecting transgender rights, insuring, among other things, that New York doesn’t go the way of Texas.
  • Speaking of Texas, the Bathroom Bill debate wages on, this time with many small businesses joining in to oppose the Texas Governor’s plans to “protect women and children”. Many Fortune 500 companies already have threatened Texas with economic hardship by refusing to do business with the state. California recently banned the use of state money to travel or do business in Texas.
  • The CEO of the state’s board of tourism recently ran the numbers:

“The bathroom bill debate has already cost the state $66 million in convention business. The state could lose more than $1 billion in additional convention business should Texas lawmakers pass the bill. San Antonio hotels have lost 43,623 booked hotel room-nights from convention groups that canceled because of the bathroom bill debate. San Antonio has already lost three conventions valued at $3.1 million because of the debate. Another 15 convention groups have threatened to cancel their events should a bathroom bill become law, taking with them $41 million in local spending.”

  • Newsweek recently reported that the Trump Administration’s Attorney General Jeff Sessions ordered his prosecutors to review the case files on murders of transgender people to make sure there’s not a serial killer or hate group carrying out the attacks, he said in a speech Thursday morning. He also said he told his prosecutors to work with the FBI and U.S. attorney offices around the country to figure out how they can help local law enforcement investigating the murders. “We have and will continue to enforce hate crime laws aggressively and appropriately where transgendered individuals are victims,” the attorney general said.

The point isn’t to say people aren’t scared and worried about themselves or people they know. As we always say here at The Transamorous Network, the future is uncertain, but the probability of the future happening that you focus on increases the more you focus on it. Read that sentence again. It’s important.

And that’s why here at The Transamorous Network we strive to get you to focus on positive outcomes about the future and positive aspects about what is. For the future is borne of your thoughts.

So think positive ones.

 

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How “evil” works in your favor

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White supremacist, terrorist and murderer James Alex Fields Jr. arrested for his deadly participation in violence in Virginia.

It’s just so freaking interesting how things are progressing in the United States right now. As we watch our highest office in the land usurped by a racist, emboldening white supremacists to come out of the shadows, I wouldn’t blame transgender people for feeling fearful and worried. Or people of color.

And yet, it is undeniable that tremendous good is resulting from all this.

Before we look at that, let’s look at some facts. First, we here at the network already shared (via our Facebook Program IN YOUR FACE) how Trump’s infamous tweet about banning transgender people from the military was really a brilliantly-played smokescreen he laid to mask the FBI raid of his campaign chief’s house in the pre-dawn hours. This raid happened at nearly the exact same time Trump turned to twitter. Interestingly, as we said and you probably know, the entire world focused on the tweets. Including the transgender community. Meanwhile, few media reported at the time about the FBI raid, which would have further eroded Trump’s credibility.

Were you among the bamboozled? We weren’t!

We had been saying all along that tweet was NOT about banning transgender people from the military. It’s NEVER about what it’s about.

Then, we saw how Secretary of Defense James Mattis came out in the news essentially saying there may be no transgender ban. In fact, the White House has yet to offer a policy on the issue. It may, it may not. If it does, Mattis will take the responsible action, which I read to mean he’s going to do the right thing, which is not what the president wants.

Next we saw massive violence erupt in Virginia prompted by white supremacists who showed up to protest the removal of a confederate statue. The president then made a series of speeches about the event that were breathtaking…and not in a good way.

On the heels of all that, not one, not two, but several US cities are acting to remove prominent confederate statues from parks and buildings, the leaders of these cities acknowledging they represent symbols of white supremacy and have no place in United States public places. Many of those cities are in Southern states!

Following all that, the heads of all branches of the US Military came out stridently against white supremacy. This is a direct contradiction of their commander-in-chief. THAT alone is remarkable in US history.

One has to wonder: What the heck is next?

Stories create reality. Stories are powerful. It doesn’t matter if your stories focus on what you don’t want, or what you do want, they will faithfully create either. We pointed out in that same IN YOUR FACE episode that Neo-nazis, skinheads, and other white supremacists have some of the most focused, powerful stories….. Their focus is on how terrible and subhuman people of color are. The want a white nation. But they don’t focus on that. They focus on how terrible people of color, gay people, jews, transgender people and other minorities are. They decry how everything and everyone is against white race. All the while they don’t realize their stories are faithfully delivering what they focus on: bringing them more people of color, more binary and trans people, more whites who fight for people of color and equality, more jews doing the same. More gay people. And now, the removal of their cultural symbols.

Yes, the things happening over the last few weeks…since Trump came into the White House actually, can be seen as a kind of evil. But the acts of “evil” are always focused on pushing against good. And whatever your stories push against, you get more of. So it’s inevitable that evil will produce good. That’s what we’re seeing in our nation today.

What does this mean for us trans-attracted men and transwomen? It means look around you: the world is showing you demonstration after demonstration of the power of stories. It’s also showing you that everything eventually serves good. The same can be said for your life: Your life is predisposed to you experiencing good. It is showing you that what you focus on you get. So you can experience the life you always wanted, the love you always wanted, anything you’ve wanted. But you have to tell stories that support what you want, not what you don’t want. Which means you have to focus on that which you’re wanting.

But even if you don’t focus on positive stories, you will, eventually, have all you’re wanting.  For many that may not happen in this lifetime. But it will happen.

Since the choice is yours, why wait?

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When poll numbers tell us nothing

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Click to enlarge if you want.

In the wake of Trump’s momentous tweet last month, those with an anti-transgender agenda pointed to polls demonstrating that Americans agree with the president’s claim that the military would be better off without transgender people serving in it.

Those poll NUMBERS indeed seem to support that statement. One poll conducted in late June showed that 31 percent of Americans said it was bad for the military to have transgender people serving. Only 21 percent said it was good and 38 percent said they had no idea.

Another poll, much more widely, shared said 44 percent of “likely voters” agreed with Trump’s tweet, while 45 percent disagree, showing the country pretty evenly split.

Let’s go back to college and talk about polling and survey methods. If you recall, your professor harped on question formation. How you formulate your question means everything in survey research.  The questions you ask, if they aren’t considered thoughtfully, will result in your survey measuring the wrong opinion.

Let’s go back and look at those polls cited above. The first one asked:

“The U.S. Department of Defense now allows transgender people, those who identify with and want to live as the opposite sex, to serve openly in the military. Is this decision good for the military, bad for the military or does it have no impact?”

The majority of Americans have no educated opinion on this matter! How on earth does the average American know anything about this? They don’t! it’s the wrong question because people’s opinion on this matter is irrelevant: they aren’t qualified to have an opinion.

The other poll asked survey respondents to “agree”, “disagree” or select “undecided” to the following statement, which you should recognize because it’s what Trump tweeted:

“Our military must be focused on decisive and overwhelming victory and cannot be burdened with the tremendous medical costs and disruption that transgender in the military would entail.”

Now this is a more “valid” question because anyone can have an opinion about what someone says or does. A person needs no qualifications to judge this. But this is still not the right question! Who cares if people agree with the president? This is not a presidential issue, it’s a policy issue. You have to ask the right question.

On July 26 Reuters released polling results which tell a completely different story. Reuter’s poll shows that nearly two-thirds of Americans believe transgender people should be in the military. How could this poll show such an overwhelming majority of people supporting transgender service people when the other two did not?

It asked a different question:

“Transgender people should be allowed to serve in the military.”

Only 27 percent of people responded “they should not be allowed” and the rest of respondents didn’t know how to answer the question. That latter group is likely more qualified to have that opinion because most people in America don’t know what it’s like to serve in the military because they haven’t served themselves.

It’s interesting how numbers can always be used to argue for a specific agenda. That’s why it’s so important to look beyond the numbers. For clues always exist which clarify just what the numbers are saying. In this case, what they’re saying is: you gotta ask the right question.

 

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BREAKING: Dear Donald: There already are transgender servicemembers

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Ex-Navy SEAL Kristin Beck: Was she any less lethal a Navy Seal?

This morning President Trump announced via twitter that no people who happen to be transgender will be allowed to serve in the military citing the need for our armed forces to be “…focused on decisive and overwhelming…..victory…and [therefore] cannot be burdened with the tremendous medical costs and disruption that transgender [sic] in the military would entail.”

This is a strange decision, and an interesting way of announcing a major military policy reversal, but that’s beside the point. The main point: there already ARE and have been transgender armed service members. They serve everywhere, including the Navy’s elite special warfare combat crew, which works along with Navy Seals. It should also be noted that a former Navy Seal also has come out as transgender. Our armed forces are lethal. Even with transgender service members in it.

It seems this action may be less about military lethality, and even less about being transgender. It may have far more to do with politics in our opinion. Or maybe race: The right has avowed to reverse all decisions the first black President of the United States made during his two-term presidency.

Before the transgender community gets up in arms, or worried, check your stories. Those who follow our content know this is a crucial moment in time-space reality. You must respond in a way that creates future realities you’re wanting to see, not the ones your fear-based stories will create. So create interpretations of this situation that give you positive feelings. Not feelings of worry, anger, frustration or powerlessness.

  • “This is ok. Things change.”
  • “There will be another president. This will not stand.”
  • “I’m happy to know that in the long line of time, justice always prevails.”

You can’t go from feeling despair, powerless or grief, to feeling happy, joyful and optimistic. That’s too far of an emotional jump. But you can make your way from that really negative story to one of “less negativity”:

  • If you’re feeling powerless, and you can get yourself to feelings of anger or desire for revenge, you have improved your story. A story generating feelings of powerlessness sounds like this, for example: “Transgender people will never be respected in this world” or, “Transgender people will always be denied their rights.” You can move from powerlessness to anger or revenge with this kind of story, for example: “That motherfucker Trump is a fucking DICK!!!!” or, “I’m glad I’m not in the military, because if I was, I would get medieval on those cis-het-white PRICKS!!!!!!”
  • If you can move from anger to worry or frustration, you have improved your story. For example, you can move from the anger-inducing stories above to these: “I’m concerned about what my friend, who is in the service and trans, will do. I guess I’ll call him and see how he’s doing.” Or: (if you’re in the military) “This sucks. I’ve just come out to my Guard command. Now I gotta wait and see how this is going to affect me. But I know I have friends here. So I’m good. Just frustrated. It’s all going to work out.”
  • If you can go from frustration to pessimism, you have improved your story. For example, you can relatively easily get from the above stories to the following: “I’m not sure this is going to turn out well, but we’ll see.” Or: “This means people in the military who are transgender are going to have to be discharged. That’s not good.”
  • And if you can go from pessimism to boredom, contentment or hopefulness, you have improved your story. For example: “Ok. I’m glad I’m not in the military so I don’t have to worry about this. Trump sucks, but at least this doesn’t effect me.” Or: “You know, hopefully in four years (or less, if he gets impeached), we won’t have to deal with this silliness.”

These kinds of things take time to unfold. Just because the Trump Administration made this decision today doesn’t mean it will remain in place forever. In the meantime, transgender people will still serve. They will, for the time being, have to do it the way they had before President Obama allowed them to serve openly. But they will do it nonetheless.

Remember this: if one president can decree it perfectly acceptable to serve in the military and be transgender, so can another. Just like with healthcare*, the cat is out of the bag. Transgender servicemen have tasted the sweet life of serving “out”. They won’t for long allow that sweet life to be denied. And neither will their allies, friends and families. Including those transgender community members who succeed in taking political office in the future.

Chin up. Life is great. All is going well.

 

*Today, while the right continues to “repeal and replace ‘Obamacare’”,  two-thirds of Americans believe healthcare is a right and that government should ensure healthcare coverage.

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Freedom and being trans…or not

The detransitionersA Seattle weekly magazine focused recently on a transgender story few want to talk about.

That is, unless your agenda includes seeing transgender people as a big problem.

The topic: detransition.

According to the article, this topic riles all fringe elements of communities affected by people who come out as Trans. The Alt-Right, radical feminists, even people I would call radical trans-activists seem to bristle at the possibility that people sometimes don’t know either what they want, or who, or what they are.

But that is life.

Some people grok their identity early on. Others take years. Others change their mind. Someone who changes their mind doesn’t invalidate decisions others have made who haven’t changed their mind.

Which is interesting because the anecdotal examples in the “take caution” perspective towards becoming transgender point to destransitioners as more than exceptions. They are examples that some people (maybe a lot according to these people) don’t know what they are doing and are therefore being harmed or unduly influenced by society, peer pressure, what they call a trend or worse.

But the article quotes Ami Kaplan, a therapist in New York who has worked with transgender, gender variant, and genderqueer clients for more than 20 years as saying that after two decades in practice, she knows of only one client who fully transitioned and then later detransitioned. Twenty years of practice seems to me to be a strong body of evidence.

In some cases, the transgender community may not be helping the issue. A few people, such as a person quoted in the article, claim that some medical practitioners, fearful of being seen as a gatekeeper, “lean toward wanting to help people transition.”  This fear obviously is coming from clinician’s concern about how the transgender community sees them. And, that probably has to do with their livelihood: if they make a living serving the community, certainly being seen as a gatekeeper could have income-limiting effects.

Says one detransitioner:

“I didn’t really feel like I could talk to my counselors about detransitioning in the way that I wanted,” she said, “because they have specific political views, and I felt like if I said I had these criticisms of the whole concept of transitioning, they would have thought I was being brainwashed by transphobic bigots or whatever.”

 

The world is a big place. There are a lot of people in it. That means a lot of stories. This article has a lot to say to those open-minded enough to read it. Ultimately freedom-to-be seems to be the key here: while our society pushes against us in so many ways, ultimately, people must come to the point where “I am free to choose” is the guiding light of their life experience.

Read the full article. It’s worth it.