Category: Self improvement

Editor’s note: The Transamorous Network publishes across several platforms. Medium.com is one of those. This story describes what happened when Medium’s lawyers contacted us about last week’s post.

When I noticed the email from their lawyers, a lump formed in my throat. Only for a second though. That’s because I know what I know: I create my reality. So what was about to happen was going to be more of what’s come before: really good stuff.

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

I write posts for The Transamorous Network to inspire transgender women and trans-attracted men towards getting what they want. In doing that, I’m doing my part to bring both communities together. They’re really one community. But because both sides vilify one another, they look like two communities. They’re not, however.

Most posts tell how my clients’ lives become happier after practicing what I offer. Their lives become happier when clients learn how stories create reality. Then they learn how to use that knowledge to deliberately create lives in which everything they want happens.

But I sometimes share about my life. For me, life is a living laboratory. I want to see how good life can get. If we all create our reality, I dare to create something never seen before. So I’m pushing this practice to its extremes. I practice what I preach, in other words.

As a result, some posts I write share what’s happening with me. That’s what I shared in a recent post. A post I’ve since deleted.

I deleted it after engaging with Medium.com’s lawyers. They didn’t tell me to delete it. I deleted it on my own.

But again, I’m getting ahead of myself.

My evidence gets me in trouble

Last week I posted a story about a transgender woman who was outing trans-attracted men around the country. She would date them briefly. Then she’d send letters to family members or wives outing the men. I didn’t know who this woman was. I wanted to know her, though.

So I set my intention to discover her. The post described how that happened. It happened in this incredible way. One I couldn’t have planned, because it involved people I didn’t even know.

Previous posts about this unfolding warned men to look out for her and avoid her. There’s a vigilante out there, I told my trans-attracted readers. So when my intention fulfilled itself, by bringing me her identity, I saw it as my role to help men avoid getting into trouble. I therefore included the woman’s first name. I also included pictures of her.

While the story was still published, I received positive reactions. One comment on Medium.com caught my attention though. A transgender woman wrote disapprovingly about me including the woman’s picture.

Now, again, I practice what I share with my clients extensively in my own life. One area I’ve intended deliberately is connecting with people who appreciate what I share. Especially people who are respectful and kind. So it didn’t surprise me, nor did I miss how gentle and kind this trans woman expressed her disapproval. She was firm, but she made a request that I remove the perpetrator’s picture and thanked me in advance. She would check back, she said, and if the picture remained, she would report the post to Medium.com for violating their terms.

Here’s her comment:

Calling the moderation police

I replied to the trans woman with equal gentleness. Here’s what I wrote:

I think this surprised the commenter. She replied with another really kind comment. It included more detail for why she wrote her first comment. Her rationale made a lot of sense. Much of it I agreed with. Here’s what she wrote:

And, in full transparency, here’s how I responded. We see the world very similarly. Yet, there’s a fair distinction too. Neither is right or wrong.

My message to the moderators got a relatively immediate reply. It said they hadn’t read the post yet, but would. Based on my initial inquiry, they asked if I owned rights to the photos. I did not.

I prepared to remove the photos because of the rights claim. But I also wanted to hear what they thought after reading the post. With all this attention on it, I forgot what the post really was about. It wasn’t about targeting this transgender woman. Instead, it mainly described how my intention delightfully fulfilled itself. And how I resolved the mystery with no effort on my part.

That’s something I promise awaits anyone who learns what I offer: The ability to manifest anything they want with no effort. Including fantastic love lives.

A perspective-transforming email

The next morning, I got an email from “legal@medium.com”. It wasn’t at all what I expected. Instead of saying whether the post violated their terms, it was an appeal employing the Socratic Method. It caught me by surprise. I’ll append a screen shot of the response at the end of this story, followed by their very kind followup.

The email went straight to the matter. It felt like a better version of me was talking to myself. The writer after laying out their perspective asked a question. Upon reading their argument, all I could do is agree: I may or may not have violated the terms. But that wasn’t the point. The question was, do I align with Medium.com’s goal?

Of course I do align with it. But what happened next was transformative.

I felt two powerful emotions after reading their appeal. One was embarrassment. The other: shame. I knew everything the appeal offered. Why didn’t that knowledge keep me from posting those photos?

I’ll answer that in a bit.

Meanwhile, something remarkable happened. Because of what I practice, I knew what “embarrassment” and “shame” were telling me. In that split-second I felt those emotions, I used them to discover really disempowering stories. Stories I wouldn’t have been able to do anything about had this not happened.

In other words, the emotions were good. Not because I should be embarrassed and ashamed. But because they offered tremendous transformation.

The goodness in “bad” situations

My Broader Perspective knew this was a transformative opportunity. One that would benefit me hugely going forward. But stories active in me said “You did something wrong.” “You’re a bad person.”, “You’re a hypocrite.”

Everything happening in life offers extreme value. I wanted to write, just now, “everything happening in life is good“. But the word “good”, for us humans, fouls up our minds. That’s because our concept of “good” is highly restricted.

So “value” is a better word. Everything happening holds great value.

But, humans are free to create any interpretation they want about what’s happening. Interpreting what’s happening as anything other than valuable, however, creates realities matching that “off” interpretation.

This explains why it’s very hard, if not impossible, to find a lover if we believe one doesn’t exist. Or if we believe the target of our affection will never want us. Or if we don’t believe we’re good enough to have that love. Our beliefs are the place from which our reality springs.

Life works that way so we can “true” up our stories/beliefs/interpretations so they match what’s really happening. In doing that, we align ourselves with our unfolding desires. Our life then fills with what we want. It does that with no effort on our part. So when life “goes wrong” or seems “bad”, it’s good. Life is showing us something important so we can do something about it.

The gifts begin rolling in

What you just read comprises the foundation for The Transamorous Network practice. Clients and I take a journey towards getting all we want, effortlessly. It is possible. But that experience requires removing many, many beliefs we have. Many we have created ourselves, but many others we’ve adopted from the world around us. Including other people.

Shame and embarrassment pointed to beliefs of the latter variety. For me, they got started in childhood, with parents, teachers and others doing what they thought was “educating” me. Later, workplace “performance reviews” perpetuated such beliefs. Friendships and lovers perpetuated them too. Registering lovers’ and friends’ disapproval in me often amplified similar beliefs.

But I’m not that child who needed education. I never was. Nor was I what supervisors, past friends or lovers saw. Instead, I’m an eternal, wise, rambunctious being. An eternal being that enjoys total freedom as part of All That Is. An eternal being on a glorious adventure of life in physical reality!

I no longer need to hold onto those bogus stories! But I can’t release them unless I know they’re there. This whole experience showed me where they were!

For ALL it’s worth

That was the first gift of this whole encounter: Recognition and acknowledgment. From there, I saw the transgender woman who commented, and the Medium.com legal team member, were helping me realize something important. They showed me the dominant self-image I hold.

Both people were kind and respectful, loving even. The legal team member, especially, communicated in a way I deeply appreciated. But both reflect back to me my own inner self-concept (a story). One that says “I want to be someone who is decent, loving and kind to all people.”

I hadn’t been a loving person with the perpetrator, I thought. But then I realized the next major benefit this experience offered. It offered the opportunity to serve her in the way the legal person and the commenter served me.

Understanding how this unfolded requires acknowledging the complexity inherent in life experience. But it’s so good to tell. It’s good to tell because it shows how we all are one. We’re all helping one another expand into more of the decent, loving, eternal beings we all are.

Remember the question I posed earlier?

I knew everything the legal team member offered. Why didn’t that knowledge keep me from posting those photos?

The following section answers that question.

One of many benefits

We’re all connected. We’re also all moving through the exact same process: We’re expanding into the fuller nature of who/what we are. Each of us exist in unique “locations” on this expansionary process. But we all help one another as we help ourselves.

Abraham calls this “helping” aspect of life “cooperative components.” In other words, people act as cooperative components to others’ individual expansion. They reflect back to us what we need to expand. Life experience generally does this too. It’s the major “purpose” of life experience. It doesn’t matter that we often are oblivious to these cooperative components. They’re helping anyway.

So Úmi, the woman I “outed” in the deleted post, is undergoing her expansion, as am I. As are you. Úmi has experienced a lot of troubling and traumatic situations. Especially at the hands of men. Of course, she’s creating those. She creates them through stories she tells. As she tells them, she creates situations which reflect those stories back to her.

Úmi, then, is creating experiences with men which reflect her own inner conflicts about her life, who she believes she is and a host of other subjects. Attacking men, their wives and families is a lashing out at that reality. The reality is there to have her see what’s happening inside her, though. She doesn’t know this, of course, so she blames her situation for how she feels. Meeting The Transamorous Network and using it as a tool caused me to rendezvous with her and her stories. I became, therefore, a cooperative component of her expansion.

So me including her photos in the story was a reflection of what she was doing to these men: outing them to loved ones. My act served as a cooperative component to Úmi’s personal expansion.

Multi-layered beneficial expansion

In a crude sense, she got a taste of her own medicine. Me exposing her the way I did served her. But it also served me in the way I described throughout this post, with cooperative components simultaneously showing beliefs in me I must release. I must release them to move forward in my process. In the same way, Úmi must release stories holding her back. Or face increasingly intense experiences until she eventually does release them.

Nothing goes wrong in life. It all serves, moving all of us into greater levels of appreciation and love, especially self-love. Along the way, if we’re aware, we can deliberately shape the process. And in shaping it, we can experience joyful, fulfilling lives. Lives, again, where desires fulfill themselves with little effort on our parts.

So this entire experience was one of profound movement through stories I had. Stories whose time was up. Stories I was ready to release. The experince was totally consistent with many other experiences happening these days.

Looking back, I appreciate everything that happened. Especially the trans woman who commented on the story. I even appreciate Úmi, the woman who terrorized those men, their wives and families.

I equally appreciate the Medium legal team member, who, at the end suggested I could repost the story and just leave out the part that targets the woman.

Good idea. I think I’ll do that.

Now, as promised, here’s Medium’s response email, followed by my and their replies.