Transgender, Trans-Attracted…And…Over 50

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Once when visiting The Philippines, I spied a man –– probably in his sixties –– who was walking hand-in-hand with a woman. Not only was this woman less than half his size (and a quarter his girth), she was clearly a quarter his age.

Now I don’t have any issue with people dating whoever they want. That’s not the point.

The point is, while some transgender women may think all trans-attracted men are looking for relationships with young transgender women –– significantly younger –– there are trans-attracted and transamorous men out there who would prefer a transgender woman from the same generation.

And, guys, there are transgender women of mature age looking for guys their age too.

I know for sure this is the case, because both groups are writing me emails.

And while it’s probably ego-boosting, guys, to think about being with a very young transgender woman for the sex appeal perhaps, or the beauty maybe, listen up.  A long term, meaningful relationship that isn’t based on some kind of unstated, commercial exchange, is more likely with someone who has some life experience. Someone with common beliefs, and, likely, common desires.

In other words: someone whose stories match yours.

It’s highly unlikely a 58 year old’s and a 20 year old’s stories are going to match.

Unless, again, a commercial exchange is the story bringing two together. After all, there are plenty of older men out there willing to pay for the company of a younger woman. Including a transgender woman.

Happens all the time, right?


I’ve commented on social media accounts featuring transgender women asking moderators how come they don’t feature older transgender women.

I haven’t got a response from any of them.


I speculate mature, senior transgender women are likely too busy living their lives to post as regularly as young ones do on social media. Perhaps young transgender women who are prominent on social media find telling their stories on social media as natural. About as natural as, say a senior transgender woman sharing her stories in person.


Whatever the case, middle-age and senior transgender women’s and trans-attracted men’s relative absence online may cause these groups to think their matches aren’t out there, when, actually, there are lots of women in that age range. And guys too.

Interestingly, research by UCLA’s Williams Institute found that there are almost as many elderly transgender people as young. The study estimated that 0.5% (or one in every 200) of Americans aged 65 or over identified as transgender, compared to 0.7% among 13- to 24-year-olds.

So there are bound to be transgender women of all ages in your town.

Same goes with trans-attracted/transamorous men.

And remember, guys (and gals), you only need one.

It’s not surprising older men (and many older transgender women) who write us ask “is there anyone out there for me?”

That’s why we don’t encourage online dating, cruising social media or trying to find your partner anywhere other than in your hometown. Or at least nearby. But always in person. Because online dating can be brutal to one’s positive stories.

CNN recently featured a story about a person who is photographing and chronicling the joys and struggles of senior-age transgender people (yes transgender men as well). I loved stumbling onto this article because it confirmed for me there are transgender people of all ages out there.

You don’t have to settle. You can have what you want.

Online dating by any other name still sucks

Online dating: for most of us it doesn’t work. Especially for trans-attracted guys, you’re going to have a hard time online. (Photo by Thomas Lefebvre)

A few weeks back, a new dating website for transgender people launched. It was meant to combat discrimination transgender people experience in online dating and dating apps such as Tinder. This new one was heralded as the place for transgender people to meet online.

Its release was timely. Especially with the demise of Craigslist personals. Business killed off the free (and scuzzy) hook-up section of Craigslist; the organization was potentially at great risk of violating new anti-human trafficking laws. So this new site promised to offer what Craigslist no longer could, what Tinder refused to and what other sites have struggled to provide: a level playing field for transgender people to find relationship.

Whatever form that relationship takes.

“Life has been so hard for trans people because they have to overcome the social stigma of being transgender. When it comes to dating, it’s even harder for them. They need a comfortable place to meet and date with other trans people without judgement. So we created Transdr – a Tinder alternative for the trans community.”

So said Sean Kennedy, the co-founder of Transdr, this new app promising a safe place for transgender people to do whatever they look for in online dating. One look at the site and the problems with Transdr are GLARINGLY obvious. A for intent. F for execution.

But we don’t care about their intent or execution. While online dating has proven successful for some, it presents so much frustration for many other people.

According to online dating literature, dating services can’t really improve relationship outcomes. On dating sites like, which allow users to make their own dating decisions, daters have difficulty meeting the right partners. Studies show that they are unable to make successful selections: more often than not, you’re just as likely to be successful in real life as you are online.

But there’s another way. An easier way. A more fun way. We talk about that way all day long her on The Transamorous Network. It’s actually the ONLY way people meet anyway, whether they are online or not. But that’s another story.

A former online dating user wrote us recently. We think he accurately describes experiences people (mostly men) have with online dating:

“…the only ones who win online are the websites with bogus profiles. The websites who take a unique part of society and spin it for their financial benefit and it simply pisses me off. After many years I certainly know who I am attracted to and who I wish to spend time with, knowing that there is some parasite out there focused on ripping me with many others off simply tightens the jaw….I am merely fed up with being ripped off. Thanks for your viewpoint on life for me will get better one way or the other.”

Do you feel like this guy? Wanna be different? Better do something different. We offer a different approach at The Transamorous Network. One that works. Guaranteed.