Gotta love the moms (and dads)

It’s not impossible.

It may be hard to read this post if you’re transgender and your family has disowned you, or you’re transamorous and in the closet because you’re afraid your family may reject you. But I’m telling you that focusing on the following instead of the rejection you feel or your fears can produce a miracle for you.

There are increasing numbers of parents realizing their transgender children deserve their love, attention and affection. I was going to write this just about moms, because I see more and more stories of them coming to this realization. However, recently, like in the last two weeks, I’ve come across more stories of dads doing the same thing. The latest and probably highest-profile is Warren Beatty’s  adoration of his son. But I’ve seen others.

If you have been rejected by your family, it may bring no solace to know that your experience and your desire for your family’s acceptance has paved the way for these new emerging transgender children to be born to loving, accepting parents. But that is exactly what is happening. That the parents are stepping up to being loving accepting parents can have an effect on your relationship with your parents. The reason why is because your relationshp with your parents is having an effect on their relationship with theirs. I can assure you your parents can become loving and accepting of you. If that is what you want. So long as you focus on the fact that they are not loving and accepting, however, they cannot become the loving and accepting people you want them to become.

Nothing stays the same. Everything is always changing. It just looks like things are staying the same because we humans tend to focus on what is, thus creating more of that instead of using the constantly changing nature of reality to create what we want. The transgender community can go so much farther focusing on what is going right, that spending so much energy focusing on what is going wrong. This includes transamorous men. The more we focus on all the great things happening in our lives and the world, the lower the probability that you will experience the fears and shame you harbor about your attraction, fears and shame that keep you in the closet.

We’re all connected. Meaning, these young transpeople coming into the world are riding high on the fulfillment of your desires for parental love and acceptance. You can have that same experience. But you have to get out of your own way first. We can show you how to do that.

While you’re thinking about that, check out these awesome dads who have realized their transgender children deserve their love.




Why I really like Transparent

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The cast of Amazon’s Transparent

It’s because the transwomen on there seem real, albeit in concentrated form. Unlike the L word and other shows intending to showcase LGBTQ and other minority communities, transwomen in Transparent aren’t super hot, gorgeous, waifs superfeminized and successful. They are trying to make their lives work for them against many odds while doing the best with what they have as far as their bodies and brains take them.

Even the cis-characters are tapestries of the human condition. Sometimes extremely so. In fact, Transparent is a kind of amplified version of reality – like all fantasy that is TV. It concentrates problems characters face to concentrate drama thereby enhancing viewership. It’s engaging if you don’t take it too seriously.

As a transamorous male, I enjoy seeing a more accurate portrayals of transwomen to the degree Transparent can portray them. It is fantasy though. It will never accurately portray what every single transperson’s experience is no more than the Huxtables on The Cosby Show could for all blacks. The trans spectrum, like the human one, is broad. Which means there are many successful transwomen working in the everyday work world, doing things ordinary people do, living relatively invisible lives. To watch this show then believe you know something about a transperson may be a fair assumption, but a dangerous one. Still, it’s a good start if you’re just getting your feet wet.

I don’t love transparent because of it’s accurate portrayal of transpeople. I love it because it’s good entertainment about a subject I care deeply about.