Feeling Good: The Best Way To Find Love

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Photo: Alex Iby

Make a habit of feeling good. It’s a sure way to find love. Especially if you’re transgender, or transamorous.

Feeling good eliminates drama too. It also makes improving your life easy.

Finding trouble finding love? Finding it difficult to accept your transamory? Or maybe you’ve accepted it privately. Now you want to “go public”. But something is stopping you.

Feeling good can help with all that. And a lot more.

We are all meant to be happy.

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Feeling good is happiness. Happiness includes prosperity and freedom, including financial freedom, time freedom and freedom of an easy love relationship. Everything you think as necessary to being happy, you can have.

You don’t have to deprive yourself. Or compromise. Especially in relationship.

You’re meant to be continually happy. If you’re not doing that, you’re making life harder than it needs to be.

It’s funny how we sometimes say “If I have that guy or girl I’m looking for as a partner I’ll be happy.” Or “He makes me happy.” Relationships don’t make a person happy.

Having that perfect partner in your life doesn’t make you happy. That relationship, no matter how wonderful, comes with button pushing, unmet expectations, and lots of growth opportunities.

Can you be happy in a relationship? Yes.

But not because of the relationship. You’re happy because you’re happy.

Happiness doesn’t come from having that new job, or that car or house you want, or that money you’re wanting either.

When you satisfy a want, you feel the satisfaction, sure. But notice: over time, that satisfaction fades as new wants come up and old satisfied ones get…well…old. 🙄

Relationships are like satisfied wants. They are meant to be fulfilled. And, just like you have satisfied wants, you’re supposed to have satisfying relationships.

GOTTA BE HAPPY BLOG
If it seems like “no duh”, then why are so many not happy?

It takes a while to get to lasting happiness. Not because it’s hard – it’s easy.

It takes a while though because you have to slow your old way of living’s influence. Thinking life is hard, that you must work hard, that relationships are hard, that “you don’t always get what you want”, that men are all X and women are all Y, these kinds of thoughts act against your happiness. You have to replace those stories with new ones. Then you have to make them as automatic as the stories you now tell yourself.

Once that happens….oh my.

So the trip is worth it.

So here’s how to start the journey to feeling good:

Step one: Appreciate, appreciate, appreciate. Write down how much you appreciate. Try expressing appreciation for things you take for granted, such as the device you’re reading this on, the shoes on your feet, soap, toothpaste. Start with simple things.

Step two: Pay attention to what you’re feeling. Your feelings tell you what kind of story you’re telling. Develop a habit of checking in with yourself throughout the day. We can help you develop these powerful habits. We’re really good at it.

Step three: Stop listening to the news. We know this is difficult for some people. But the more you listen to the news, particularly negative news about the transgender community, the more unhelpful stories you create and the more you reinforce your old stories. It’s hard being happy and listen to the news.

Besides, very little – actually almost nothing – in the news pertains to you.

Step four. Get out more. Take more walks. While you’re out there, practice step one above and notice things in the world you take for granted. Getting out in nature has huge mood enhancing benefits.

Step five. At the end of each day, acknowledge all the good that happened, including your success in doing these five steps.

Practice these five steps daily. Before you know it, you’ll find yourself well on the way to unshakeable happiness and freedom. Then, and only then you’ll get all you’re wanting. Including that relationship. And you’ll get it all with little effort. We guarantee it.

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